התוכחה וגבולותיה
הדף מאת: מנחי עתי"ד / חל"ד מפעלים חינוכיים
במקורות אנו מוצאים עקרונות המנחים להוכיח אדם בצנעה וכן מקורות הקוראים להענישו בפומבי. מהו שביל הזהב? דף לימוד זה, של חלד, נכתב על מנת לעורר דיון בנושא התוכחה בחדר המורים ויכול לשמש צוותים חינוכיים שונים.
דיון
כמורים, אנו נדרשים מדי פעם להוכיח את תלמידינו במטרה להוביל אותם בדרך הישר. מה צריכים להיות גבולות התוכחה ככלי חינוכי: מתי נכון לגעור בתלמיד מול כולם? מתי נכון לעשות זאת בצנעה?
תוכחה ללא הלבנת פנים
מצוות תוכחה לישראל שאינו נוהג כשורה... ואמרו שם בספרא: יכול מוכיחו ופניו משתנות? תלמוד לומר: 'ולא תשא עליו חטא'. וזה מלמד שבתחילת התוכחה שראוי לאדם להוכיח בסתר ובלשון רכה ובדברי נחת, כדי שלא יתבייש.
The commandment of rebuke to an Israelite who does not behave properly: To rebuke an Israelite who does not behave properly - whether about things that are between a man and his fellow or between a man and the Omnipresent - as it is stated (Leviticus 19:17), "you shall surely rebuke your compatriot, and you shall not bear a sin for him." And they said in Sifra, Kedoshim 4:8, "From where [do we know] that if you rebuked him four or five times and he did not return, that you are obligated to go back and rebuke [him again]? [Hence] we learn to say, 'you shall surely rebuke.'" And they, may their memory be blessed, also said in the Gemara (Bava Metzia 31a), "'You shall surely rebuke' - even a hundred times." And they said in the Sifra, "Perhaps, he should rebuke and his face change [color]? [Hence] we learn to say, 'and you shall not bear a sin for him.'" And this teaches that at the beginning of the rebuke it is fitting for a person to rebuke privately, with soft expressions and calm words, so that he not be embarrassed. But there is no doubt that if he does not return with this, that we shame the sinner in public and publicize his sin and insult him, until he returns to the better.
דיון
- האם גם בתוכחה של תלמיד יש לעשות זאת "בארבע עיניים" כדי שלא לבייש אותו?
מה היתרונות של תוכחה מסוג זה?

- האם יש לדעתכם מצבים שנכון לשנות בהם מדרך זו ולגעור בתלמיד בפני חבריו?
מה המטרה של תוכחה מסוג זה?
למען יראו וייראו
וְהָאִישׁ אֲשֶׁר יַעֲשֶׂה בְזָדוֹן לְבִלְתִּי שְׁמֹעַ אֶל הַכֹּהֵן הָעֹמֵד לְשָׁרֶת שָׁם אֶת ה' אֱלוֹקיךָ אוֹ אֶל הַשֹּׁפֵט, וּמֵת הָאִישׁ הַהוּא וּבִעַרְתָּ הָרָע מִיִּשְׂרָאֵל. וְכָל הָעָם יִשְׁמְעוּ וְיִרָאוּ וְלֹא יְזִידוּן עוֹד.
And the man that doeth presumptuously, in not hearkening unto the priest that standeth to minister there before the LORD thy God, or unto the judge, even that man shall die; and thou shalt exterminate the evil from Israel. And all the people shall hear, and fear, and do no more presumptuously.
תנו רבנן: אין ממיתים אותו אלא בבית הדין הגדול שבירושלים, ומשמרין אותו עד הרגל וממיתין אותו שנאמר: וְכָל הָעָם יִשְׁמְעוּ וְיִרָאוּ, דברי רבי עקיבא.
אמר ליה רבי יהודה: וכי נאמר "יראו וייראו"? והלא לא נאמר אלא "ישמעו וייראו"?...
אלא ממיתין אותו מיד וכותבין ושולחין בכל המקומות: איש פלוני בן איש פלוני נתחייב מיתה בבית דין.
that the upper knot is mandated by Torah law, then fulfillment of the mitzva is already compromised from the outset when the additional string is tied together with the other threads. The Gemara challenges: If so, the status of phylacteries is also the same. If one crafts phylacteries of the head with four compartments, and he then brings another compartment and places it alongside them, these compartments with which he fulfills the mitzva stand alone and that additional compartment stands alone and does not compromise the fulfillment of the mitzva. And if one crafts phylacteries of the head with five compartments, the fulfillment of the mitzva is already compromised from the outset. The Gemara answers: But doesn’t Rabbi Zeira say: If there is an obstruction which creates an outer compartment of the phylacteries of the head that is not exposed to the air, the phylacteries of the head are unfit for use in the fulfillment of the mitzva? Therefore, adding a fifth compartment to the four compartments of the phylacteries of the head always compromises the fulfillment of the mitzva. MISHNA: One does not execute the rebellious elder, neither in the court that is in his city, nor in the court that is in Yavne, although that was the seat of the Sanhedrin after the destruction of the Second Temple. Rather, one takes him up to the High Court in Jerusalem. And they guard him in incarceration until the pilgrimage Festival, and the court executes him during the pilgrimage Festival, as it is stated: “And all the nation shall hear, and fear, and no longer sin intentionally” (Deuteronomy 17:13); this is the statement of Rabbi Akiva. Rabbi Yehuda says: One does not delay administering justice to this individual. Rather, the court executes him immediately, and the judges write reports and dispatch agents to all the places, informing them: So-and-so is liable to be punished with the court-imposed death penalty for disobeying the court. GEMARA: The Sages taught in a baraita (Tosefta 11:3): One does not execute the rebellious elder, neither in the court that is in his city, nor in the court that is in Yavne. Rather, one takes him up to the High Court that is in Jerusalem. And they guard him in incarceration until the pilgrimage Festival, and the court executes him during the pilgrimage Festival, as it is stated: “And all the nation shall hear, and fear” (Deuteronomy 17:13); this is the statement of Rabbi Akiva. Rabbi Yehuda said to Rabbi Akiva: Is it stated: And all the nation shall see and fear, which would indicate that the entire nation must actually witness his execution? But isn’t it stated only: “And all the nation shall hear and fear,” indicating that merely informing the people of the execution is sufficient? Why delay administering justice to this individual? Rather, the court executes him immediately, and the judges write reports and dispatch agents to all the places informing them: So-and-so was sentenced and found liable to be punished with execution in court. The Sages taught: There are four transgressors condemned to be executed whose verdicts require a proclamation to inform the public: One who instigates others to engage in idol worship, and the stubborn and rebellious son, and the rebellious elder, and conspiring witnesses. In all of these cases, it is written concerning them: “And all the nation” (Deuteronomy 17:13), or: “And all Israel” (Deuteronomy 13:12, 21:21), except with regard to conspiring witnesses, where it is written: “And those who remain shall hear and fear” (Deuteronomy 19:20), as not everyone is fit for providing testimony. Therefore, rather than saying that all of the nation or all of Israel must be informed, only those remaining who are not disqualified from providing testimony are those who must heed the verse: “Hear and fear and shall henceforth commit no more such evil in the midst of you” (Deuteronomy 19:20). MISHNA: The false prophet mentioned in the Torah includes one who prophesies that which he did not hear from God and one who prophesies that which was not said to him, even if it was said to another prophet. In those cases, his execution is at the hand of man, through strangulation imposed by the court. But with regard to one who suppresses his prophecy because he does not want to share it with the public, and one who contemptuously forgoes the statement of a prophet and refuses to heed it, and a prophet who violated his own statement and failed to perform that which he was commanded to do, his death is at the hand of Heaven, as it is stated: “And it shall come to pass, that whosoever shall not hearken unto My words that he shall speak in My name, I will exact it of him” (Deuteronomy 18:19). One who prophesies in the name of idol worship and says: This is what the idol said, even if he approximated the correct halakha in the name of the idol to deem ritually impure that which is ritually impure and to deem ritually pure that which is ritually pure, is executed by strangulation. In the case of one who engages in intercourse with a married woman once she entered her husband’s domain for the purposes of marriage, even if the marriage was not yet consummated, as she did not yet engage in intercourse with him, one who engages in intercourse with her is executed by strangulation. Before marriage, one who engages in intercourse with her is liable to be executed by stoning. And conspiring witnesses who testified that the daughter of a priest committed adultery are executed by strangulation, even though were she guilty, she would be executed by burning. And her paramour is also executed by strangulation, as in any case where one engages in intercourse with a married woman. As all those who are rendered conspiring witnesses are led to their deaths via the same mode of execution with which they conspired to have their victim executed, except for conspiring witnesses who testified that the daughter of a priest and her paramour committed adultery. In that case, although the priest’s daughter who commits adultery is executed by burning, the conspiring witnesses who sought to have her executed are executed by strangulation, as is the paramour whom they also conspired to have executed. GEMARA: The Sages taught in a baraita about the punishment of those who sin concerning prophecy: With regard to three of them, their execution is at the hand of man, and with regard to three of them, their execution is at the hand of Heaven. In the case of one who prophesies that which he did not hear from God, and one who prophesies that which was not stated to him, and one who prophesies in the name of idol worship, their execution is at the hand of man. In the case of one who suppresses his prophecy, and one who contemptuously forgoes the statement of a prophet, and a prophet who violated his own statement, their execution is at the hand of Heaven. The Gemara asks: From where are these matters derived? Rav Yehuda says that Rav says that it is derived from a verse, as the verse states: “But the prophet who shall sin intentionally to speak a word in My name that I have not commanded him to speak, or who shall speak in the name of other gods, that prophet shall die” (Deuteronomy 18:20). The Gemara analyzes the verse: “But the prophet who shall sin intentionally to speak a word in My name”; this is a reference to one who prophesies that which he did not hear. The verse then states: “That I have not commanded him,” from which it is inferred: But I did command another. This is a reference to one who prophesies that which was not stated to him. “Or who shall speak in the name of other gods”; this is a reference to one who prophesies in the name of idol worship. And it is written with regard to all of these: “That prophet shall die.” And every death stated in the Torah without specification is referring to nothing other than strangulation. One who suppresses his prophecy, and one who contemptuously forgoes the statement of a prophet, and a prophet who violated his own statement, their execution is at the hand of Heaven, as it is written: “And it shall come to pass, that whosoever shall not hearken [yishma] unto My words that he shall speak in My name, I will exact from him” (Deuteronomy 18:19). The reference is to one who forgoes the statement of a prophet. Read into the verse: Who shall not voice [yashmia]; the reference is to one who suppresses the prophecy. And read into the verse: Shall not heed [yishama]; the reference is to one who violated his own statement. And it is written with regard to all of these: “I will exact from him,” meaning he is liable to receive death at the hand of Heaven. § The mishna lists among those liable to be executed as a false prophet one who prophesies that which he did not hear. The Gemara comments: For example, Zedekiah, son of Chenaanah, who prophesied that Ahab should wage war against the kingdom of Aram and would be successful, as it is written: “And Zedekiah, son of Chenaanah, made for him horns of iron, and said: So says the Lord: With these shall you gore the Arameans, until they are consumed” (II Chronicles 18:10). The Gemara asks: What was Zedekiah, son of Chenaanah, to do? Why was he held responsible? After all, the spirit of Naboth misled him, as it is written: “And the Lord said: Who shall entice Ahab, that he may go up and fall at Ramoth Gilead…and there came forth the spirit, and stood before the Lord, and said: I will entice him. And He said…You shall entice him, and shall prevail also; go forth, and do so” (I Kings 22:20–22). Rav Yehuda says: What is the meaning of the apparently unnecessary term: “Go forth”? Could the Lord not have sufficed with telling the spirit: Do so? The term means: Go forth from My proximity. Since the spirit volunteered to engage in deceit, it was no longer fit to stand in proximity to God. What is the identity of the spirit that undertook to entice Ahab? Rabbi Yoḥanan says: It was the spirit of Naboth the Jezreelite, who was eager to take revenge upon Ahab. The Gemara comments: It was incumbent upon Zedekiah to discern between actual prophecies and false prophecies, in accordance with the statement of Rabbi Yitzḥak, as Rabbi Yitzḥak says: A prophetic vision relating to one and the same subject matter [sigenon] may appear to several prophets, but two prophets do not prophesy employing one and the same style of expression. An example of identical content expressed in different styles is the prophecy where Obadiah said: “The pride of your heart has beguiled you” (Obadiah 1:3), and Jeremiah said a similar message employing slightly different language: “Your terribleness has deceived you, even the pride of your heart” (Jeremiah 49:16). And with regard to these false prophets, from the fact that in their case all the prophets are saying their prophecies like each other, i.e., employing an identical style, conclude from it that they are saying nothing of substance and that it is a false prophecy. The Gemara asks: Perhaps Zedekiah, son of Chenaanah, did not know this statement of Rabbi Yitzḥak, and therefore should not have been held responsible? The Gemara answers: Jehoshaphat, king of Judea, was there, and he said to them that they were false prophets, as it is written: “But Jehoshaphat said: Is there not here besides a prophet of the Lord, that we might inquire of him?” (I Kings 22:7). Ahab said to him: But aren’t there all these prophets here? Why seek others? Jehoshaphat said to Ahab: This is the tradition that I received from the house of the father of my father, the house of David: A prophetic vision relating to one and the same subject matter may appear to several prophets, but two prophets do not prophesy employing one and the same style of expression. They are false prophets, as they employed the same language when stating their prophecy. § The mishna lists among those liable to be executed as false prophets one who prophesies that which was not stated to him. The Gemara comments: For example, Hananiah, son of Azzur, as Jeremiah was standing in the upper market in Jerusalem and saying: “So says the Lord of hosts: Behold, I will break the bow of Elam, the chief of their might” (Jeremiah 49:35). Hananiah raised an a fortiori inference himself: If, with regard to Elam, which came only to assist Babylonia, the Holy One, Blessed be He, said: “Behold, I will break the bow of Elam,” all the more so are the Chaldeans, i.e., the Babylonians, themselves, destined to fall. Hananiah came to the lower market and said: “So speaks the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, saying: I have broken the yoke of the king of Babylon” (Jeremiah 28:2). As a result, Hananiah, son of Azzur, was killed at the hand of Heaven (Jeremiah 28:16). Rav Pappa said to Abaye: Referring to this case as one who prophesies that which was not said to him is not precise, as not only was it not said to Hananiah, neither was this prophecy stated to another prophet. Abaye said to him: Since this matter can be inferred by means of an a fortiori inference, it is like a prophecy that was said to Jeremiah, as inferring matters a fortiori is a legitimate manner of derivation. It is Hananiah who misrepresented the prophecy, as it was not stated to him, i.e., to Hananiah, and then he presented the prophecy as though he heard it from God. The mishna lists among those liable to be executed as false prophets one who prophesies in the name of idol worship. The Gemara comments: For example, the prophets of the Baal (see I Kings, chapter 18). The mishna lists among those liable to receive death at the hand of Heaven one who suppresses his prophecy. The Gemara comments: For example, Jonah, son of Amittai (Jonah 1:1–3). The mishna also lists: And one who forgoes the statement of a prophet. The Gemara comments: For example,
דיון
- מדוע רואה התורה, ורואים חכמים לנכון, לפרסם ברבים את התנהגותו ועונשו של אותו אדם?
- מה הסכנה בדרך זו? מתי היא יכולה לפגוע בתלמיד ולא להועיל לו?
דיון
בחינה אישית
כיצד אתם מגיבים ביום-יום למקרים הבאים, וכיצד לדעתכם נכון היה להגיב?

גערה מול כל הכיתה תוכחה שקטה בצד

תלמיד דיבר אליכם
בחוצפה מול כל הכיתה

תלמידה העירה הערה
גזענית לחברתה בכיתה

תלמידה הפריעה
במהלך השיעור

בהפסקה שמעתם תלמיד
מקלל את חברו

קישורים לרקע והרחבה:
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דף מספר 4 בסדרה חדר מורים לומד, דפים נוספים בסדרה:
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