חתונה: עדוּת וקהל מסביב לאינטימיות של זוג

Before the giving of the Torah, it would be that if a man happened upon a woman in the marketplace and they wanted to marry each other, he would bring her into his house and consummate the marriage between them privately, and she would be his wife. Once the Torah was given, Israel was commanded that if a man wanted to marry a woman, he would acquire her first through witnesses, and afterwards she would be his wife, as it says, "When a man takes a woman and comes (sleeps with) to her..." (Deuteronomy 22:13).

A woman can only become engaged by her will. One who engages a woman against her will, she is not engaged. But a man who they forced until her engaged against his will she is engaged, but there are those who say she is not engaged and therefore it is in doubt. [Rema: If she originally said engage me and he threw engagement money into her arms and said to her: Behold you are betrothed to me, and she shook out her clothing while he was saying so to throw the money from her and said that she did not intend to get engaged and was only joking, even so she is engaged (Moharam, end of Sefer Nashim). They do not go after in the topic of engagement proofs that she did not intend to become engaged. If he took a woman's hand by force against her will and gave her engagement money and she does not throw the money away she is engaged, even though at the beginning it was by force and he gave it to her without saying anything, since at the beginning they were talking about engagement. If he owed her money and she told him, Give me my money: and when he gave them to her he said: Behold you are betrothed to me" and she threw the money away she is not engaged. One who marries without witnesses, even with one witness, is not married. And even if the two of them agree in the matter. And even if he married her in front of one witness and then married her in front of another witness, this one not in front of this one, she's not married. Rama: And some are stringent if he marries in front of one witness (Tur in the name of the Sma"g) if the two of them agree; but if one contradicts the witness, don't worry (so did the Rashba"tz explain according to the Sma"g). And in a situation of anchoring [she'll be an "agunah"] and pressure, [you can] rely on the lenient opinion. And there is no difference whether the witness says she was married in front of him alone, or if he says she was married in front of two and he alone saw, and the others say they didn't see (Beit Yosef, and similarly it's implied in the Responsa of the Rashb"a). And similarly if he marries in front of two, and one of them is a relative, it's as if he marries in front of one witness. And see later on Siman 47:3.