"Crying baby...ringing cellphone...Please don't spoil the music by adding your own soundtrack. Silence is Golden" - AMC's feature film introduction video, of blessed memory, 2002-2011. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OpmDnV9E20
Who knew I'd be learning that same lesson in rabbinical school? If there's one thing I will take away from my studies when I graduate in 2020, it will be the word "WAIT." You might be wondering, "wait for what?" (You probably aren't, though, but I'll tell you anyway.) WAIT stands for "Why Am I Talking?"
It's one of the most important - and underrated - tools leaders like Moishe House residents and MHWOW hosts have already or can develop.
-->the ability to quiet myself,
-->to recognize when I am uncomfortable and sensing the need to battle that feeling with filler words,
-->to convey a message without words
-->to contract myself in order to make space for someone else.
This week when a divinely-ordained fire kills two of Aaron the High Priest's sons after they offer unsolicited sacrificial offerings, Aaron is silent.
"Vayidom Aharon." His children are killed before his very eyes, and he neither has nor seeks any explanation for this tragedy. His reaction is silence. The boys' mother, Elisheva is nowhere to be found in this text, but I imagine that she, too, had no words.
But even without words, we know Aaron and Elisheva are feeling a level of pain that is nearly unfathomable. If they were your friends, family, or community members, how would you react? Would you feel the need to say the "right thing?" To make things better? Perhaps the best way to comfort those struggling is by meeting them where they are, and showing an open heart, compassionate eyes, and silent lips. And if you feel the need to say something, just remember one word: WAIT.