Vayetze ~ Jewish Thanks
To be Jewish is to give thanks, generally

(לה) וַתַּ֨הַר ע֜וֹד וַתֵּ֣לֶד בֵּ֗ן וַתֹּ֙אמֶר֙ הַפַּ֙עַם֙ אוֹדֶ֣ה אֶת־ה' עַל־כֵּ֛ן קָרְאָ֥ה שְׁמ֖וֹ יְהוּדָ֑ה וַֽתַּעֲמֹ֖ד מִלֶּֽדֶת׃

(35) And she conceived again, and bore a son; and she said: ‘This time will I praise (thank) the LORD.’ Therefore she called his name Judah; and she left off bearing.

ואמר ר"י משום ר"ש בן יוחי מיום שברא הקב"ה את עולמו לא היה אדם שהודה להקב"ה עד שבאתה לאה והודתו שנאמר (בראשית כט, לה) הפעם אודה את ה':
And Rabbi Yoḥanan said in the name of Rabbi Shimon ben Yoḥai: From the day the Holy One, Blessed be He, created the world, no one thanked the Holy One, Blessed be He, until Leah came and thanked Him, as it is stated: “And she became pregnant and gave birth to a son, and she said, ‘This time I will give thanks to God,’ and thus he was called Judah” (Genesis 29:35).

Same idea appears in a variety of sources, from Bereshit Rabbah to the Zohar. It gets inside the Talmud, but obviously the connection between Shimon Bar Yochai and our essence - being Jewish - and giving thanks is very old. This is the point of the sourcesheet.

Commentators such as Rashi and Radak will point to Leah's standing in the family as the source of gratitude: she has more than "her share" of children (Rashi) or she understands that she "got more than she requested".

Thanksgiving when things could go either way and go well

יב) אִ֣ם עַל־תּוֹדָה֮ יַקְרִיבֶנּוּ֒ וְהִקְרִ֣יב׀ עַל־זֶ֣בַח הַתּוֹדָ֗ה חַלּ֤וֹת מַצּוֹת֙ בְּלוּלֹ֣ת בַּשֶּׁ֔מֶן וּרְקִיקֵ֥י מַצּ֖וֹת מְשֻׁחִ֣ים בַּשָּׁ֑מֶן וְסֹ֣לֶת מֻרְבֶּ֔כֶת חַלֹּ֖ת בְּלוּלֹ֥ת בַּשָּֽׁמֶן׃ (יג) עַל־חַלֹּת֙ לֶ֣חֶם חָמֵ֔ץ יַקְרִ֖יב קָרְבָּנ֑וֹ עַל־זֶ֖בַח תּוֹדַ֥ת שְׁלָמָֽיו׃ (יד) וְהִקְרִ֨יב מִמֶּ֤נּוּ אֶחָד֙ מִכָּל־קָרְבָּ֔ן תְּרוּמָ֖ה לַה' לַכֹּהֵ֗ן הַזֹּרֵ֛ק אֶת־דַּ֥ם הַשְּׁלָמִ֖ים ל֥וֹ יִהְיֶֽה׃ (טו) וּבְשַׂ֗ר זֶ֚בַח תּוֹדַ֣ת שְׁלָמָ֔יו בְּי֥וֹם קָרְבָּנ֖וֹ יֵאָכֵ֑ל לֹֽא־יַנִּ֥יחַ מִמֶּ֖נּוּ עַד־בֹּֽקֶר׃

(12) If he offers it for thanksgiving, he shall offer together with the sacrifice of thanksgiving unleavened cakes with oil mixed in, unleavened wafers spread with oil, and cakes of choice flour with oil mixed in, well soaked. (13) This offering, with cakes of leavened bread added, he shall offer along with his thanksgiving sacrifice of well-being. (14) Out of this he shall offer one of each kind as a gift to the LORD; it shall go to the priest who dashes the blood of the offering of well-being. (15) And the flesh of his thanksgiving sacrifice of well-being shall be eaten on the day that it is offered; none of it shall be set aside until morning.

(א) אם על תודה יקריבנו. אם על דבר הודאה על נס שנעשה לו, כגון יורדי הים והולכי מדברות וחבושי בית האסורים וחולה שנתרפא שהם צריכין להודות שכתוב בהן (תהלים קז כא כב) יודו לה' חסדו ונפלאותיו לבני אדם ויזבחו זבחי תודה.

If [the thanksgiving offering] is done on account of being thankful for a miracle that happened to her/him; such as going down into the sea, or crossing a desert, or being set free from imprisonment, or recovering from a sickness, they need to do so with praise [to G-d], as it is written regarding these people, "...Praise G-d's overabundant goodness, for G-d's wonders done for people. Let people offer up thanksgiving offerings." (Ps 107:21-22)

(א) הַתּוֹדָה הָיְתָה בָאָה חָמֵשׁ סְאִין יְרוּשַׁלְמִיּוֹת, שֶׁהֵן ... עֶשְׂרִים עִשָּׂרוֹן, עֲשָׂרָה לֶחָמֵץ וַעֲשָׂרָה לַמַּצָּה. עֲשָׂרָה לֶחָמֵץ, עִשָּׂרוֹן לְחַלָּה. וַעֲשָׂרָה לַמַּצָּה, וּבַמַּצָּה שְׁלשָׁה מִינִין, חַלּוֹת וּרְקִיקִים וּרְבוּכָה. נִמְצְאוּ שְׁלשָׁה עֶשְׂרוֹנוֹת וּשְׁלִישׁ לְכָל מִין, שָׁלשׁ חַלּוֹת לְעִשָּׂרוֹן.

(1) The thanksgiving offering was brought from five se'im [specific unit of volume] of flour of the Jerusalem measure, which is ... twenty issaron, ten of which for leavened bread and ten for unleavened bread. Ten for the leavened [meant that] each loaf [was made from] a whole issaron [of flour]. The ten for the unleavened bread - and in the unleavened bread [there were] three varieties: loaves, wafers and deep-fried dumplings - therefore there were three and a third issaron for each variety, three loaves for every issaron.

Total: 10 loaves of leavened bread + 30 loaves of unleavened bread

(in three varieties)!

והענין דתכלית תודה שבא על הנס הוא כדי לספר חסדי ה׳ שגמל עליו . ומטעם זה ריבה הכתוב בלחם ומיעט בזמן אכילת תודה מכל שלמים. היינו כדי שיהי׳ מרבה ריעים לסעודה אחת ביום הקרבה ויהי׳ ספור הנס לפני רוב אנשים...

And the idea is the following: The purpose for bringing the thanksgiving sacrifice upon experiencing a miracle is in order to relate the kindness of God that was performed for [the one bringing the sacrifice]. It is for this reason that the Torah required great amounts of bread but then reduced the amount of time with which to eat it, in comparison to the other Shelamim sacrifices. This, in order to bring many friends together at one meal on the day of the sacrifice, at which the host will relate the miracle before them.

אמר רב יהודה אמר רב:

ארבעה צריכין להודות: יורדי הים הולכי מדברות ומי שהיה חולה ונתרפא ומי שהיה חבוש בבית האסורים ויצא ...

מאי מברך?

אמר רב יהודה: ברוך גומל חסדים טובים אביי אמר: וצריך לאודויי קמי עשרה דכתיב (תהלים קז, לב) וירוממוהו בקהל עם וגו'

Rav Yehuda said in the name of Rav:

Four people need to offer Thanksgiving: Those who travel across the sea, who cross the wilderness, who were sick and recovered, and were imprisoned and released. ...

The Gemara asks: What blessing does he recite?

Rav Yehuda said: Blessed is…Who bestows acts of loving-kindness.

Abaye said: And he must offer thanks before ten people, as it is written in the same chapter: “Let them exalt Him also in the congregation of the people and praise Him in the assembly of the elders” (Psalms 107:32), and congregation indicates a group of at least ten.

This type of thanksgiving - things could go either way, and went well ~ is to be done in community. In a large community, clearly: the feast is of 40 loaves of bread to be eaten in a day. This is the source of our birkat hagomel.

Extreme thanksgiving: the case of Yov
(כא) וַיֹּאמֶר֩ עָרֹ֨ם יצתי [יָצָ֜אתִי] מִבֶּ֣טֶן אִמִּ֗י וְעָרֹם֙ אָשׁ֣וּב שָׁ֔מָה ה' נָתַ֔ן וַה' לָקָ֑ח יְהִ֛י שֵׁ֥ם ה' מְבֹרָֽךְ׃
(21) And he said; Naked came I out of my mother’s womb, And naked shall I return thither; The LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; Blessed be the name of the LORD.

Here Yov is saying a wondrous thing: everything we have or not have is from God. So even losses are a moment of giving thanks. Easier said than done, but again, in Jewish thought a few non-Jews do come and teach us the pinnacle of a specific mitzvah (remember Dama in Kiddushin 31a - he would not wake his father, Netina, to get to the key under his pillow to retrieve the stones to sell for the breastplate of the High Priest at a price of 600,000 dinars. Dama forfeited this great sum simply so as not to disturb his father’s sleep (and was rewarded the following year by finding in his flock and selling a rare red heifer to the rabbis for the same sum).

חייב אדם לברך כו': מאי חייב לברך על הרעה כשם שמברך על הטובה אילימא כשם שמברך על הטובה הטוב והמטיב כך מברך על הרעה הטוב והמטיב והתנן על בשורות טובות אומר הטוב והמטיב על בשורות רעות אומר ברוך דיין האמת אמר רבא לא נצרכה אלא לקבולינהו בשמחה אמר ר' אחא משום ר' לוי מאי קרא (תהלים קא, א) חסד ומשפט אשירה לך ה' אזמרה אם חסד אשירה ואם משפט אשירה רבי שמואל בר נחמני אמר מהכא (תהלים נו, יא) בה' אהלל דבר באלקים אהלל דבר בה' אהלל דבר זו מדה טובה באלקים אהלל דבר זו מדת פורענות רבי תנחום אמר מהכא (תהלים קטז, יג) כוס ישועות אשא ובשם ה' אקרא צרה ויגון אמצא ובשם ה' אקרא ורבנן אמרי מהכא (איוב א, כא) ה' נתן וה' לקח יהי שם ה' מבורך
We learned in the mishna: One is obligated to recite a blessing for the bad that befalls him just as he recites a blessing for the good that befalls him. The Gemara asks: What does it mean: One is obligated to recite a blessing for the bad just as for the good? If we say this means that just as one recites a blessing for a positive event with the formula: Who is good and does good, so too one recites a blessing for a calamity with the formula: Who is good and does good, didn’t we learn in our mishna that over good tidings one recites: Who is good and does good, while over bad tidings one recites: Blessed…the true Judge? Rather, Rava said: The mishna’s statement was only necessary to instruct us to accept bad tidings with the same joy with which we accept good tidings, not to instruct with regard to which blessing to recite. Rav Aḥa said in the name of Rabbi Levi: What is the verse that alludes to this? “I will sing of loving-kindness and justice; unto You, O Lord, will I sing praises” (Psalms 101:1). Rav Aḥa explains: If it is loving-kindness, I will sing, and if it is justice, I will sing. I will thank God in song for the bad just as for the good. Rabbi Shmuel bar Naḥmani said: The proof is from here, as it is stated: “In God, I will praise His word; in the Lord, I will praise His word” (Psalms 56:11). The Gemara explains that In God, I will praise His word; that is the revelation of God’s attribute of benevolence, while: In the Lord, I will praise His word; that is the attribute of suffering; even if God brings suffering to bear upon me, I will still praise Him. Rabbi Tanḥum said: The proof is from here, as it is stated: “I will lift up the cup of salvation and call upon the name of the Lord” (Psalms 116:13), and: “I found trouble and sorrow, but I called upon the name of the Lord” (Psalms 116:3–4). And the Rabbis said: The proof is from here, as it is stated: “The Lord has given and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21).
Thanksgiving prayers are never to disappear. Why?

(ז) רַבִּי פִּנְחָס וְרַבִּי לֵוִי וְרַבִּי יוֹחָנָן בְּשֵׁם רַבִּי מְנַחֵם דְּגַלְיָא, לֶעָתִיד לָבוֹא כָּל הַקָּרְבָּנוֹת בְּטֵלִין וְקָרְבַּן תּוֹדָה אֵינוֹ בָּטֵל, כָּל הַתְּפִלּוֹת בְּטֵלוֹת, הַהוֹדָאָה אֵינָהּ בְּטֵלָה, הֲדָא הוּא דִכְתִיב (ירמיה לג, יא): קוֹל שָׂשׂוֹן וְקוֹל שִׂמְחָה קוֹל חָתָן וְקוֹל כַּלָּה קוֹל אֹמְרִים הוֹדוּ אֶת ה' צְבָאוֹת וגו', זוֹ הוֹדָאָה, (ירמיה לג, יא): מְבִאִים תּוֹדָה בֵּית ה', זֶה קָרְבַּן תּוֹדָה. וְכֵן דָּוִד אוֹמֵר (תהלים נו, יג): עָלַי אֱלֹקִים נְדָרֶיךָ אֲשַׁלֵּם תּוֹדֹת לָךְ, תּוֹדָה אֵין כְּתִיב כָּאן אֶלָּא תּוֹדֹת, הַהוֹדָאָה וְקָרְבַּן תּוֹדָה.

(7) Rabbi Pinchas, Rabbi Levi and Rabbi Yochanan [said] in the name of Rabbi Menachem from Gallia: In the time to come, all sacrifices will be annulled - but the sacrifice of thanksgiving will not be annulled. All prayers will be annulled, but the prayer of gratitude will not be annulled. This accords with what is written [Jeremiah 33:11]: "The voice of joy and the voice of gladness, the voice of the groom and the voice of the bride, the voice of those who say 'Give thanks to the LORD of hosts' etc." - this is the prayer of gratitude. "Those who bring [the sacrifice of] thanksgiving to the House of the LORD": this is the sacrifice of thanksgiving. Thus David said: "I owe You vows and will offer you thanksgivings" [Psalms 56:13] - not "thanksgiving," but "thanksgivings," [indicating both] the thanksgiving prayer and the prayer of gratitude.

The danger of all being well for a long time...

(ב) וְזָכַרְתָּ֣ אֶת־כָּל־הַדֶּ֗רֶךְ אֲשֶׁ֨ר הֹלִֽיכֲךָ֜ ה' אֱלֹקֶ֛יךָ זֶ֛ה אַרְבָּעִ֥ים שָׁנָ֖ה בַּמִּדְבָּ֑ר לְמַ֨עַן עַנֹּֽתְךָ֜ לְנַסֹּֽתְךָ֗ לָדַ֜עַת אֶת־אֲשֶׁ֧ר בִּֽלְבָבְךָ֛ הֲתִשְׁמֹ֥ר מצותו [מִצְוֺתָ֖יו] אִם־לֹֽא׃ (ג) וַֽיְעַנְּךָ֮ וַיַּרְעִבֶךָ֒ וַיַּֽאֲכִֽלְךָ֤ אֶת הַמָּן֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר לֹא־יָדַ֔עְתָּ וְלֹ֥א יָדְע֖וּן אֲבֹתֶ֑יךָ לְמַ֣עַן הוֹדִֽעֲךָ֗ כִּ֠י לֹ֣א עַל־הַלֶּ֤חֶם לְבַדּוֹ֙ יִחְיֶ֣ה הָֽאָדָ֔ם כִּ֛י עַל־כָּל־מוֹצָ֥א פִֽי־ה' יִחְיֶ֥ה הָאָדָֽם׃ ...

(ו) וְשָׁ֣מַרְתָּ֔ אֶת־מִצְוֺ֖ת ה' אֱלֹקֶ֑יךָ לָלֶ֥כֶת בִּדְרָכָ֖יו וּלְיִרְאָ֥ה אֹתֽוֹ׃ (ז) כִּ֚י ה' אֱלֹקֶ֔יךָ מְבִֽיאֲךָ֖ אֶל־אֶ֣רֶץ טוֹבָ֑ה אֶ֚רֶץ נַ֣חֲלֵי מָ֔יִם עֲיָנֹת֙ וּתְהֹמֹ֔ת יֹצְאִ֥ים בַּבִּקְעָ֖ה וּבָהָֽר׃ (ח) אֶ֤רֶץ חִטָּה֙ וּשְׂעֹרָ֔ה וְגֶ֥פֶן וּתְאֵנָ֖ה וְרִמּ֑וֹן אֶֽרֶץ־זֵ֥ית שֶׁ֖מֶן וּדְבָֽשׁ׃ (ט) אֶ֗רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֨ר לֹ֤א בְמִסְכֵּנֻת֙ תֹּֽאכַל־בָּ֣הּ לֶ֔חֶם לֹֽא־תֶחְסַ֥ר כֹּ֖ל בָּ֑הּ אֶ֚רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֣ר אֲבָנֶ֣יהָ בַרְזֶ֔ל וּמֵהֲרָרֶ֖יהָ תַּחְצֹ֥ב נְחֹֽשֶׁת׃

(י) וְאָכַלְתָּ֖ וְשָׂבָ֑עְתָּ וּבֵֽרַכְתָּ֙ אֶת־ה' אֱלֹקֶ֔יךָ עַל־הָאָ֥רֶץ הַטֹּבָ֖ה אֲשֶׁ֥ר נָֽתַן־לָֽךְ׃

(יא) הִשָּׁ֣מֶר לְךָ֔ פֶּן־תִּשְׁכַּ֖ח אֶת־ה' אֱלֹקֶ֑יךָ לְבִלְתִּ֨י שְׁמֹ֤ר מִצְוֺתָיו֙ וּמִשְׁפָּטָ֣יו וְחֻקֹּתָ֔יו אֲשֶׁ֛ר אָנֹכִ֥י מְצַוְּךָ֖ הַיּֽוֹם׃ (יב) פֶּן־תֹּאכַ֖ל וְשָׂבָ֑עְתָּ וּבָתִּ֥ים טוֹבִ֛ים תִּבְנֶ֖ה וְיָשָֽׁבְתָּ׃ (יג) וּבְקָֽרְךָ֤ וְצֹֽאנְךָ֙ יִרְבְּיֻ֔ן וְכֶ֥סֶף וְזָהָ֖ב יִרְבֶּה־לָּ֑ךְ וְכֹ֥ל אֲשֶׁר־לְךָ֖ יִרְבֶּֽה׃ (יד) וְרָ֖ם לְבָבֶ֑ךָ וְשָֽׁכַחְתָּ֙ אֶת־ה' אֱלֹקֶ֔יךָ הַמּוֹצִיאֲךָ֛ מֵאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרַ֖יִם מִבֵּ֥ית עֲבָדִֽים׃ (טו) הַמּוֹלִ֨יכֲךָ֜ בַּמִּדְבָּ֣ר ׀ הַגָּדֹ֣ל וְהַנּוֹרָ֗א נָחָ֤שׁ ׀ שָׂרָף֙ וְעַקְרָ֔ב וְצִמָּא֖וֹן אֲשֶׁ֣ר אֵֽין־מָ֑יִם הַמּוֹצִ֤יא לְךָ֙ מַ֔יִם מִצּ֖וּר הַֽחַלָּמִֽישׁ׃ (טז) הַמַּֽאֲכִ֨לְךָ֥ מָן֙ בַּמִּדְבָּ֔ר אֲשֶׁ֥ר לֹא־יָדְע֖וּן אֲבֹתֶ֑יךָ לְמַ֣עַן עַנֹּֽתְךָ֗ וּלְמַ֙עַן֙ נַסֹּתֶ֔ךָ לְהֵיטִֽבְךָ֖ בְּאַחֲרִיתֶֽךָ׃ (יז) וְאָמַרְתָּ֖ בִּלְבָבֶ֑ךָ כֹּחִי֙ וְעֹ֣צֶם יָדִ֔י עָ֥שָׂה לִ֖י אֶת־הַחַ֥יִל הַזֶּֽה׃ (יח) וְזָֽכַרְתָּ֙ אֶת־ה' אֱלֹקֶ֔יךָ כִּ֣י ה֗וּא הַנֹּתֵ֥ן לְךָ֛ כֹּ֖חַ לַעֲשׂ֣וֹת חָ֑יִל לְמַ֨עַן הָקִ֧ים אֶת־בְּרִית֛וֹ אֲשֶׁר־נִשְׁבַּ֥ע לַאֲבֹתֶ֖יךָ כַּיּ֥וֹם הַזֶּֽה׃ (פ)

(2) Remember the long way that the LORD your God has made you travel in the wilderness these past forty years, that He might test you by hardships to learn what was in your hearts: whether you would keep His commandments or not. (3) He subjected you to the hardship of hunger and then gave you manna to eat, which neither you nor your fathers had ever known, in order to teach you that man does not live on bread alone, but that man may live on anything that the LORD decrees...

(6) Therefore keep the commandments of the LORD your God: walk in His ways and revere Him. (7) For the LORD your God is bringing you into a good land, a land with streams and springs and fountains issuing from plain and hill; (8) a land of wheat and barley, of vines, figs, and pomegranates, a land of olive trees and honey; (9) a land where you may eat food without stint, where you will lack nothing; a land whose rocks are iron and from whose hills you can mine copper.

(10) When you have eaten your fill, give thanks to the LORD your God for the good land which He has given you.

(11) Take care lest you forget the LORD your God and fail to keep His commandments, His rules, and His laws, which I enjoin upon you today. (12) When you have eaten your fill, and have built fine houses to live in, (13) and your herds and flocks have multiplied, and your silver and gold have increased, and everything you own has prospered, (14) beware lest your heart grow haughty and you forget the LORD your God—who freed you from the land of Egypt, the house of bondage; (15) who led you through the great and terrible wilderness with its seraph serpents and scorpions, a parched land with no water in it, who brought forth water for you from the flinty rock; (16) who fed you in the wilderness with manna, which your fathers had never known, in order to test you by hardships only to benefit you in the end— (17) and you say to yourselves, “My own power and the might of my own hand have won this wealth for me.” (18) Remember that it is the LORD your God who gives you the power to get wealth, in fulfillment of the covenant that He made on oath with your fathers, as is still the case.

The Power of Gratitude

https://www.ou.org/torah/parsha/rabbi-sacks-on-parsha/the-power-of-gratitude/

In the early 1990s one of the great medical research exercises of modern times took place. It became known as the Nun Study. Some 700 American nuns, all members of the School Sisters of Notre Dame in the United States, agreed to allow their records to be accessed by a research team investigating the process of ageing and Alzheimer’s Disease. At the start of the study the participants were aged between 75 and 102.

What gave this study its unusual longitudinal scope is that in 1930 the nuns, then in their twenties, had been asked by the Mother Superior to write a brief autobiographical account of their life and their reasons for entering the convent. These documents were now analysed by the researchers using a specially devised coding system to register, among other things, positive and negative emotions. By annually assessing the nuns’ current state of health, the researchers were able to test whether their emotional state in 1930 had an effect on their health some sixty years later. Because they had all lived a very similar lifestyle during these six decades, they formed an ideal group for testing hypotheses about the relationship between emotional attitudes and health.

The results, published in 2001, were startling.[2] The more positive emotions – contentment, gratitude, happiness, love and hope – the nuns expressed in their autobiographical notes, the more likely they were to be alive and well sixty years later. The difference was as much as seven years in life expectancy. So remarkable was this finding that it has led, since then, to a new field of gratitude research, as well as a deepening understanding of the impact of emotions on physical health.

What medicine now knows about individuals, Moses knew about nations. Gratitude – hakarat ha-tov – is at the heart of what he has to say about the Israelites and their future in the Promised Land. Gratitude had not been their strong point in the desert. They complained about lack of food and water, about the manna and the lack of meat and vegetables, about the dangers they faced from the Egyptians as they were leaving and about the inhabitants of the land they were about to enter. They lacked thankfulness during the difficult times. A greater danger still, said Moses, would be a lack of gratitude during the good times. This is what he warned:

When you have eaten your fill and have built fine houses and live in them, and when your herds and flocks have multiplied, and your silver and gold is multiplied, and all that you have is multiplied, do not exalt yourself, forgetting the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery … Do not say to yourself, ‘My power and the might of my own hand have gained me this wealth.’ (Deut. 8:11-17)

The worst thing that could happen to them, warned Moses, would be that they forgot how they came to the land, how God had promised it to their ancestors, and had taken them from slavery to freedom, sustaining them during the forty years in the wilderness. This was a revolutionary idea: that the nation’s history be engraved on people’s souls, that it was to be re-enacted in the annual cycle of festivals, and that the nation, as a nation, should never attribute its achievements to itself – “my power and the might of my own hand” – but should always ascribe its victories, indeed its very existence, to something higher than itself: to God. This is a dominant theme of Deuteronomy, and it echoes throughout the book time and again.

Since the publication of the Nun Study and the flurry of further research it inspired, we now know of the multiple effects of developing an attitude of gratitude. It improves physical health and immunity against disease. Grateful people are more likely to take regular exercise and go for regular medical check-ups. Thankfulness reduces toxic emotions such as resentment, frustration and regret and makes depression less likely. It helps people avoid over-reacting to negative experiences by seeking revenge. It even tends to make people sleep better. It enhances self-respect, making it less likely that you will envy others for their achievements or success. Grateful people tend to have better relationships. Saying “thank you” enhances friendships and elicits better performance from employees. It is also a major factor in strengthening resilience. One study of Vietnam War Veterans found that those with higher levels of gratitude suffered lower incidence of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Remembering the many things we have to be thankful for helps us survive painful experiences, from losing a job to bereavement.[3]

Jewish prayer is an ongoing seminar in gratitude. Birkot ha-Shachar (The Morning Blessings), ‘the Dawn Blessings’ said at the start of morning prayers each day, form a litany of thanksgiving for life itself: for the human body, the physical world, land to stand on and eyes to see with. The first words we say each morning – Modeh/Modah ani, “I thank you” – mean that we begin each day by giving thanks.

Gratitude also lies behind a fascinating feature of the Amidah. When the leader of prayer repeats the Amidah aloud, we are silent other than for the responses ofKedushah, and saying Amen after each blessing, with one exception. When the leader says the words Modim anachnu lakh, “We give thanks to You,” the congregation says the a parallel passage known as Modim de-Rabbanan. For every other blessing of the Amidah, it is sufficient to assent to the words of the leader by saying Amen. The one exception is Modim , “We give thanks.” Rabbi Elijah Spira (1660–1712) in his work Eliyahu Rabbah[4] explains that when it comes to saying thank you, we cannot delegate this away to someone else to do it on our behalf. Thanks has to come directly from us.

Part of the essence of gratitude is that it recognizes that we are not the sole authors of what is good in our lives. The egoist, says Andre Comte-Sponville, “is ungrateful because he doesn’t like to acknowledge his debt to others and gratitude is this acknowledgement.”[5] La Rochefoucald put it more bluntly: “Pride refuses to owe, self-love to pay.” Thankfulness has an inner connection with humility. It recognizes that what we are and what we have is due to others, and above all to God. Comte-Sponville adds: “Those who are incapable of gratitude live in vain; they can never be satisfied, fulfilled or happy: they do not live, they get ready to live, as Seneca puts it.”

Though you don’t have to be religious to be grateful, there is something about belief in God as creator of the universe, shaper of history and author of the laws of life that directs and facilitates our gratitude. It is hard to feel grateful to a universe that came into existence for no reason and is blind to us and our fate. It is precisely our faith in a personal God that gives force and focus to our thanks.

[1] See Robert Emmons, Thanks!: How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 2007.

[2] Danner, Deborah D., David A. Snowdon, and Wallace V. Friesen. “Positive Emotions in Early Life and Longevity: Findings from the Nun Study.”

[3] Much of the material in this paragraph is to be found in articles published in Greater Good: The Science of a Meaningful Life @ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu.

[4] Eliyahu Rabbah, Orach Chayyim 127: 1.

[5] André Comte-Sponville, A Short Treatise on the Great Virtues: The Uses of Philosophy in Everyday Life. London: Heinemann, 2002.

(א) מודֶה [מודָה] אֲנִי לְפָנֶיךָ מֶלֶךְ חַי וְקַיָּם, שֶׁהֶחֱזַרְתָּ בִּי נִשְׁמָתִי בְּחֶמְלָה, רַבָּה אֱמוּנָתֶךָ:

(1) I offer thanks to You, living and eternal King, for You have mercifully restored my soul within me; Your faithfulness is great.

מודִים אֲנַחְנוּ לָךְ. שָׁאַתָּה הוּא ה' אֱלקֵינוּ וֵאלקֵי אֲבותֵינוּ לְעולָם וָעֶד. צוּר חַיֵּינוּ. מָגֵן יִשְׁעֵנוּ אַתָּה הוּא לְדור וָדור: נודֶה לְּךָ וּנְסַפֵּר תְּהִלָּתֶךָ עַל חַיֵּינוּ הַמְּסוּרִים בְּיָדֶךָ. וְעַל נִשְׁמותֵינוּ הַפְּקוּדות לָךְ. וְעַל נִסֶּיךָ שֶׁבְּכָל יום עִמָּנוּ. וְעַל נִפְלְאותֶיךָ וְטובותֶיךָ שֶׁבְּכָל עֵת. עֶרֶב וָבקֶר וְצָהֳרָיִם: הַטּוב כִּי לא כָלוּ רַחֲמֶיךָ. וְהַמְרַחֵם כִּי לא תַמּוּ חֲסָדֶיךָ. מֵעולָם קִוִּינוּ לָךְ:

We gratefully thank You, for You, O Lord our God, are our fathers' God for all eternity, our Rock, our Shield of salvation generation to generation. We thank You and recount Your praise for our lives. We trust our lives into Your loving hand. Our souls are in Your custody and Your miracles are with us every day and Your wonders and goodness are with us at all times: evening, morning and noon. You are good, for Your mercies never fail us, and the Compassionate One, for Your loving kindness never ceases; forever we have placed our hope in You. ​​​​​​​