Teshuvah for Real

RaMBaM (1135-1204), Chapter 1:1, Teshuva Laws, Mishnah Torah

If a person transgresses any of the mitzvot of the Torah, whether a positive command or a negative command - whether willingly or inadvertently - when he repents from his sin, he must confess before God, blessed be, He as [Numbers 5:6-7] states: "If a man or woman commit any of the sins of man... they must confess the sin that they committed."

This refers to a verbal confession. This confession is a positive command. How does one confess? He states: "I implore You, God, I sinned, I transgressed, I committed iniquity before You by doing the following. Behold, I regret and am embarrassed for my deeds. I promise never to repeat this act again.

Chapter 2:1

Who has reached complete Teshuvah? A person who confronts the same situation in which she sinned when she has the potential to commit [the sin again], and, nevertheless, abstains and does not commit it because of his Teshuvah alone and not because of fear or lack of strength.

Chapter 2:4

Among the paths of repentance is for the penitent to

a) constantly call out before God, crying and entreating;

b) to perform charity according to her potential;

c) to separate herself far from the object of her sin;

d) to change her name, as if to say, "I am a different person and not the same who sinned";

e) to change the behavior in its entirety to the good and the path of righteousness; and

f) to travel in exile from her home. Exile atones for sin because it causes a person to be submissive, humble, and meek of spirit.