Chassidic Masters: Elul Edition Class 3: Rav Nachman on Teshuvah

(4) Before a person returns to God, he has no being. It is as if he has not yet been created. Because it would have been better for him not to have been created at all. But when he comes and purifies himself in order to return to God, he puts himself in order and prepares to become a being. This element of preparation for becoming — coming into being, as it were — explains why the Divine Name which is associated with repentance is Ehyeh, “I shall be” (Ibid.).

(5) When someone wants to purify himself and return to God, they tell him “Wait!” (Yoma 38b-39a). It is true that he should hurry to release his soul and flee from the darkness. But he shouldn’t be discouraged and depressed when he sees how far he is from true prayer and other holy devotions. It is a necessary part of the process that he should wait. In the end he will be worthy of making amends completely, and all will be restored. Understand this well (Ibid.).

(6) Repentance never stops. It is a continuing movement. Even at the very moment that a person is saying “I have sinned, I have transgressed, I have rebelled, etc.” it is still impossible for him to say the words with complete sincerity without a single extraneous motive. Thus he must repent for his earlier repentance — namely the flaw in his previous confession (Ibid. 3).

(7) Even when a person knows that he has achieved perfect repentance he must still make amends for his earlier repentance. For what he achieved then was good only in proportion to the perception of Godliness he had at the time. But now, after his repentance, his perception has undoubtedly been heightened. Compared with his present perception, the earlier perception turns out to have been grossly materialistic. Therefore he must repent for the levels he achieved earlier — because he degraded the true exaltedness of the Creator to the level of materialism. Happy is the man who achieves true repentance (Ibid.).

(9) The essence of teshuva, repentance, is achieved through humility. One has to make oneself into nothing — like a wasteland which people trample over. He must pay no attention whatsoever to opposition or to the contempt with which people may treat him. He should train himself to be silent and to be able to hear himself insulted without replying. One such as this is worthy of the name “wise” and he will attain perfect repentance — the “Crown,” which is the summit of the Sefirot. This is the way to true and enduring glory, the glory of God (6).

(10) When a person wants to return to God he must become an expert in the halachah, the law (halachah literally means “going”). Two kinds of skill are needed: in the “running” and the “returning” (cf. Ezekiel 1:14). These two expressions correspond to the rising and falling which King David speaks of in the Psalms: “If I ascend to Heaven, You are there, and if I make hell my bed, behold there You are (Psalms 139:8). This means that a person who wants to return to God must gird his loins and keep firmly to the pathway of God regardless of whether he makes progress (“if I ascend to Heaven”) or suffers reverses (“if I make hell my bed”). If he makes progress and reaches a particular level of spirituality — be it high or not so high — he should still not stop here and content himself with his achievement so far. In his case the skill he needs is to know and believe that he must still advance further. This is the skill of the “running.” On the other hand, even if he falls to a lower level — and even if he falls into the lowest pit of Hell, God forbid — he must still not despair in any way, regardless of his condition. He should remain firm and search for God, pleading with Him and begging Him to help in whatever way he can. Even in the lowest pit of hell God is present, and even from there it is possible to be attached to Him. As King David said: “If I make hell my bed, behold, there You are”. The skill he needs now is in the “returning.” The only way to achieve true repentance is with these two skills. Indeed, it takes extraordinary skill to understand that it is necessary to struggle all the time in order to serve God. One has to aim constantly for a higher level while at the same time never allowing oneself to fall in any way or become despondent and discouraged. Someone who acquires these skills will be able to walk the path of true repentance, and God’s right hand will be open wide to receive his repentance. He will attain to the glory of God, and Man will be placed upon the throne. Happy is he (Ibid. 4).