Judaism and Homosexuality: Orthodox, Conservative and Reform sources

• How do we make sense of these texts?
• Are there pieces that we are missing?
• Do they apply to our society today? Why or why not?

"[In antiquity], Jews and most other people believed that it was the man and his semen who provides the actual life, the "seed," and that the woman was merely the soil, so to speak, in which the seed grew to maturity to be born. It was considered almost like murder to allow the "seed" to be wasted through masturbation, homosexuality, or sexual intercourse without intent to procreate. It was also erroneously believed...that semen, "the precious fluid," was limited in quantity so that if it was "wasted", the energy and strength of the man would thereby be reduced" (Mary Calderone and Eric Johnson, The Family Book about Sexuality, p. 158, quoted by Rabbi Michael Gold, p. 107, retrieved from Teaching Hot Topics, p. 307).

Rabbi Norman Lamm (former Chancellor of [Orthodox] Yeshiva University)

All laws are repressive to some extent - they repress illegal activities - and all morality is concerned with changing man and improving him and his society.

Homosexuality imposes on one an intolerable burden of differentness, of absurdity, and of loneliness, but the Biblical commandment cannot be put aside solely on the basis of sympathy for the victim of these feelings.

"Homosexuality is no different from any other anti-social or anti-halakhic act, where it is legitimate to distinguish between the objective act itself, including its social and moral consequences, and the mentality and inner development of the person who perpetuates the act . . . To use halakhic terminology, the objective crime remains a ma'aseh avayrah (a forbidden act) whereas the person who transgresses is considered innocent on the grounds of ["oh-ness"] (force beyond one's control)." - Rabbi Norman Lamm, "Judaism and the Modern attitude toward Homosexuality," Encyclopedia Judaica Yearbook, 1974.

I’m an Orthodox rabbi who is going to start officiating LGBTQ weddings. Here’s why. (Rabbi Avraham Mlotek)

I understand that the plain reading of Leviticus considers homosexual sex a “toevah,” often translated as an abomination. I understand that Jewish law views kiddushin, the ritual ceremony of marriage, as a legal structure between a man and a woman. I know and respect this.

But I also believe that the Torah does not want human beings to live alone, and supports a covenantal relationship between parties as they build a faithful Jewish home. I know that Judaism has, for thousands of years, had a rich understanding of the diversity of gender identities. I know that the Torah affirms the God-endowed dignity of all human beings.

In the recent film “Boy Erased,” based off Garrard Conley’s memoir describing his experience in a gay conversion program, a scene between a Baptist pastor father and his adult gay son has stayed with me. Conley’s character says something along the lines of “I’ve tried to change, God knows I’ve tried. I can’t change. Now it is your turn.”

I’ve thought about how resonant that particular sentence felt. The onus of responsibility now rests upon those of us in religious leadership positions: to continue to make space, validate, humanize, empathize and support those who have long felt suppressed by our traditions, and not the aggrieved parties themselves.

My own rabbinical school, Yeshivat Chovevei Torah, which is a beacon of progressive traditionalism, recently informed its students and alumni that one of its fourth-year students, an openly gay man, will not be receiving ordination a few months shy of graduation after years of study at the seminary. It’s a painful reminder that LGBTQ Jews still lack the ability to fully participate as equals in all facets of Orthodox life.

That is why, going forward, I will be officiating wedding ceremonies for queer Jews.

I’m passionately committed to God, Jewish law, Torah and the Jewish people. These won’t be “kiddushin” ceremonies, but similar to the brit shutafin (covenantal partnership) ceremonies the visionary Rabbi Steven Greenberg, founder of Eshel, has been performing for years.

I understand that for some, this may feel like a blatant break from tradition, and I know some of my teachers and the larger Orthodox community believe that this is crossing a line that should not be crossed.

Yet I know that there is a small but growing number of Orthodox rabbis from across the Modern Orthodox spectrum who believe that this is where we have to be moving. I hope that in doing so as a community, queer Jews will see themselves as valued in the community and see that their rabbis are ready to celebrate their life choices of sacred covenantal marriage as well. It is not only about upholding the dignity of the human being, but upholding the dignity of the Torah itself, which emphasizes the need for loving partnership.

A wedding day should be a joyous day for loving companions, as liturgy connotes, regardless of their sexual orientation. If the couple is choosing to live Jewish lives, build a Jewish home and raise Jewish children, our traditional rabbinate must seize the opportunity to welcome and work with these families at their most precious life-cycle moments. If we don’t, we risk further alienation and falling into an abyss of religious irrelevance by denying these couples their rightful place of belonging.

Shouldn’t our Orthodox communities rush at the opportunity to keep as many Jews engaged in their Judaism? Is this the Torah and this its reward?

We are long overdue for a new paradigm. I am humbled to be part of a new generation seeking to straddle the sacred tradition we inherit as well as the humanity before us.

Rabbi Steve Greenberg - An Openly Gay Orthodox Rabbi

“The verse (in Leviticus) prohibits the kind of sex between men that is designed to effect the power and mastery of the penetrator. Sex for the conquest, for shoring up the ego, for self-aggrandizement, or worse, for the perverse pleasure of demeaning another man is prohibited.

This leaves open the possibility that sex not for power and mastery may not be prohibited.

The Canaanites used homosexual acts as part of their pagan rituals. Therefore the Israelites were prohibited from doing this, not because it was an act between two men but because it was symbolic of pagan ritual. In today's world this prohibition now has no meaning [and homosexual sex is permitted]. - Rabbi Michele Brand Medwin

"The Jewish values and principles which I regard as eternal, transcendent and divinely ordained, do not condemn homosexuality. The Judaism I cherish and affirm teaches love of humanity, respect for the spark of divinity in every person, and the human right to live with dignity. The God I worship endorses loving, responsible, and committed human relationships, regardless of the sex of the persons involved." - Rabbi Janet Marder, "Jewish and Gay," Keeping Posted 32, 2; November, 1986.

R. Elliott Dorff
Now of course it is logically possible to say to gays and lesbians, as some rabbis writing on the subject have said, that if they cannot change their homosexual orientation, they should remain celibate all their lives. That result, however, is downright cruel. Moreover, I find such a position theologically untenable. I, for one, cannot believe that the God who created us all produced a certain percentage of us to have sexual drives that cannot be legally expressed under any circumstances. That is simply mind-boggling — and, frankly, un-Jewish. Jewish sources see human beings as having conflicting urges that can be controlled and directed by obedience to the wise laws of the Torah; it is Christian to see human beings as endowed with urges that should ideally be forever suppressed. To hold that God created homosexuals to be sexually frustrated all their lives makes of God a cruel playwright and director in this drama we call life, and our tradition knew better. It called God not only merciful but good. God’s law, then, must surely be interpreted to take those root beliefs of our tradition into account. Jewish theology and law are not two disparate realms; here, as always, they must be interpreted to reflect each other. Furthermore, it seems to me that to ask gays and lesbians to remain celibate all their lives is not halakhically required. If gays and lesbians are right in asserting that they have no choice in being homosexual . . . then they are as forced to be gay as straights are forced to be straight . . . " - Rabbi Elliot Dorff, Matters of Life and Death, p. 144-145.

Conservative Movement's Responsa on Homosexuality (Dorff, Nevins, Reisner)

Dor dor v’doroshav — each generation demands its own interpretations of Jewish law. As the Torah says, “When a matter shall arise that confounds you…you shall go and inquire of the judge who shall be in that day, and they will tell you the law.”

(Deut. 17:9) For the CJLS to avoid this issue or to declare that nothing can be done for homosexuals... would be a terrible defeat for our religious mission.

Conservative Movement's Responsa on Homosexuality Conclusions:

1. The explicit biblical ban on anal sex between men remains in effect. Homosexual men are instructed to refrain from anal sex.
2. All Jews who are homosexual are to be welcomed into our synagogues and other institutions as full members with no restrictions... and those who desire to serve as rabbis, cantors and educators shall be welcomed to apply to our professional schools and associations.

"We favor the establishment of committed and loving relationships for gay and lesbian Jews. The celebration of such a union is appropriate with blessings over wine and shehechayanu, with psalms and other readings to be developed by local authorities... Yet can these relationships be recognized under the rubric of kiddushin (Jewish marriage)? . . .

We are offering two model ceremonies, one that closely follows the traditional Jewish wedding liturgy, and one that starts fresh. Each ceremony accomplishes the following tasks which we consider to be essential to any Jewish marriage ceremony:

A) The couple is welcomed, and God's blessings are requested for their marriage.

B) Traditional symbols of celebration - such as wine - and of commitment - such as rings - are used to add significance to this moment.

C) A document of "covenant" committing the couple to live a life of mutual fidelity and responsibility is read and witnessed. This covenant is affirmed at the rings ceremony and constitutes the halakhic mechanism for binding the couple together as a family.

D) Blessings thanking God for this sacred moment of loving covenant are recited, and the couple's relationship is linked to the broader narrative of the Jewish people and its redemption."

(Rabbis Elliot Dorff, Daniel Nevins, and Avram Reisner, "Rituals and Documents of Marriage and Divorce for Same-Sex Couples, RA, 2012.)