A Guilt Free Guide to Successful Repentance

הֲשִׁיבֵ֨נוּ ה' ׀ אֵלֶ֙יךָ֙ ונשוב [וְֽנָשׁ֔וּבָה] חַדֵּ֥שׁ יָמֵ֖ינוּ כְּקֶֽדֶם׃

Return us, Adonai, to You, and we will return; Renew our days as in the beginning.

Hashiveynu Adonai eleha venashuva

hadesh yameynu kekedem

תניא שבעה דברים נבראו קודם שנברא העולם ואלו הן תורה ותשובה וגן עדן וגיהנם וכסא הכבוד ובית המקדש ושמו של משיח

Seven phenomena were created before the world was created, and they are: Torah, and repentance, and the Garden of Eden, and Gehenna, and the Throne of Glory, and the Temple, and the name of Messiah.

(ו) ... רַבִּי הוֹשַׁעְיָה אָמַר ... כָּל מַה שֶּׁנִּבְרָא בְּשֵׁשֶׁת יְמֵי בְרֵאשִׁית צְרִיכִין עֲשִׂיָה, כְּגוֹן הַחַרְדָּל צָרִיךְ לְמִתּוּק. הַתּוּרְמוּסִים צָרִיךְ לְמִתּוּק. הַחִטִּין צְרִיכִין לְהִטָּחֵן. אֲפִלּוּ אָדָם צָרִיךְ תִּקּוּן.

(6) ...Rabbi Hoshayah ..said: Anything created in the first six days, needs further actions, for example mustard seeds need sweetening, peas needs sweetening, wheat needs grinding, even humans need (tikkun) fixing.

ופליגא דרבי אבהו דאמר רבי אבהו מקום שבעלי תשובה עומדין צדיקים גמורים אינם עומדין שנאמר שלום שלום לרחוק ולקרוב לרחוק ברישא והדר לקרוב

... Rabbi Abbahu said: In the place where penitents stand, even the full-fledged righteous do not stand, as it is stated: “Peace, peace upon him who is far and him who is near.” Peace and greeting is extended first to him who is far, the penitent, and only thereafter is peace extended to him who is near, the full-fledged righteous.

Jerusalem Talmud

The angels sealed the window of heaven so that the prayers of Manasseh would not ascend to God. The angels said, "Master of the world, here is a man who worshipped pagan gods and set up an idol in the Temple! How can you accept his teshuvah!?!" God replied, "If I do not accept his teshuvah I would be closing a door for all baa'lei teshuvah." What did God do? S/He dug an opening beneath the Throne of Glory and accepted Manasseh's supplication.

Rebbe Nachman Likkutei Moharan 282


...a person needs to find … within himself that bit of goodness … Even when he looks inside and at first it seems that there is no goodness at all within, that everything is full of sin. And he wants simply to give up and drown himself in sadness... even so it is forbidden to give in to despair. He needs instead to search and find within himself some tiny bit of goodness – for how can it be possible that in all of his life he has never done some good deed? Some mitzvah?

And even if he finds the good deed and sees the holes in it – the impure motives, the imperfections – still, it must be that there lies within it some tiny nekudah tovah – some tiny point of goodness. He must focus there, and enliven himself with that point of goodness, and there is where his teshuvah begins… And from there he must keep looking, and find another point, and another… like the notes of a melody, he shall gather them together until they form a song. That is the song he shall sing as his prayer before the Creator…

Angela Duckworth “The Best Laid Plans” found on Character Lab

Resolving to change, however fervently you wish to do so, is no guarantee that you’ll actually follow through. Why not?

One reason is that most goals cannot be accomplished all at once and on the spot. You need a way to bridge your current intentions with your future actions. And contrary to popular belief, you don’t need more willpower; you need a strategy.

Decades of research on how children and adults turn intentions into actions have culminated in a four-step process called WOOP—an acronym that stands for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan.

Questions:

In your experience, how is guilt useful or counter-productive on the way to personal change?

What are the implications of the idea that teshuvah existed before Creation itself?

Why would human beings be made in a way that requires tikkun/fixing? What function do your imperfections serve in your life?

Why would the angels reject and God accept the repentance of a terrible sinner?

What strategies do these texts suggest for making lasting change?