Havruta Questions:
- What are your first reactions to this text?
- How do you reconcile Rebbe Nachman's original statement about teshuvah as silence with his later idea as teshuvah being about existing fully in the world?
- What about the process of the High Holidays prepares you for this process of "existing"?
Journaling question: What does it mean for you to exist more fully in the world this year?
(יד) וַיֹּ֤אמֶר אֱלֹהִים֙ אֶל־מֹשֶׁ֔ה אֶֽהְיֶ֖ה אֲשֶׁ֣ר אֶֽהְיֶ֑ה וַיֹּ֗אמֶר כֹּ֤ה תֹאמַר֙ לִבְנֵ֣י יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל אֶֽהְיֶ֖ה שְׁלָחַ֥נִי אֲלֵיכֶֽם׃
(14) And God said unto Moses: ‘I AM THAT I AM’; and He said: ‘Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel: I AM hath sent me unto you.’
(ד) ב. ועקר התשובה כשישמע בזיונו, ידם וישתק... בחינת אהיה, בחינת תשובה,
(ה) כי אהיה דא אנא זמין למהוי. הינו קדם התשובה, עדין אין לו הויה, כאילו עדיין לא נתהוה בעולם, כי טוב לו שלא נברא משנברא, וכשבא לטהר את עצמו ולעשות תשובה, אז הוא בבחינת אהיה, הינו שיהיה לו הויה בעולם, הינו אנא זמין למהוי.
אבל קדם התשובה אזי בחינת אהיה בהסתרת פנים ממנו, כי עדין לא הכין את עצמו למהוי בעולם.
The essence of teshuvah is that when a person hears themselves being insulted, they remain quiet and silent...
This corresponds to Ehyeh, which corresponds to teshuvah repentance.
For the meaning of Ehyeh is "I am prepared to be." That is, before teshuvah a person does not yet have a being. It is as if they do not yet exist in the world. Indeed, [if this is the case] it [may be] better off if they had not been created. But when a person prepares to purify and do teshuvah, they are then in the aspect of ehyeh. In other words, he will then exist in the world--i.e. "I am prepared to be."
Before teshuvah, however, the aspect of ehyeh is hidden from him. For he has not yet prepared himself to exist in the world.