Is it ok to say derogatory jokes about a group if you belong to that group?
Jerry: What's up?
Tim: I'll tell you what's up. I'm a Jew.
Jerry: Excuse me?
Tim: I'm a Jew. I finished converting two days ago.
Jerry: Well... (Thinking of something to say) Welcome aboard.
Tim: Thanks.
George: Hey, where you just at the health club?
Tim: Oh, well, I didn't do much. I just sat in the sauna. You know, it was more like a Jewish workout. I'll see ya.
(Jerry and George give confused looks)
Elaine and Jerry at his place.
Jerry: Elaine, the guy's Jewish two days, he's already making Jewish jokes.
Elaine: So what? When someone turns twenty-one, they usually get drunk the first night.
Jerry: Booze is not a religion.
Elaine: Tell that to my father. Anyway, guess what? Beth Lookner called me.
Jerry: Ooh. Beth Lookner, still waitin' out that marriage.
Elaine: What are you talking about? That marriage ended six months ago. She's already remarried.
Jerry: I gotta get on that internet. I'm late on everything.
TOP DEFINITION
Snoop started using nephew to try and get people off of using the n-word all the time. Means the same (ie brother), but in a less aggressive/derogatory sense.
what's crack-a-lackin nephew??
by jerome November 21, 2003
-Source: Urban dictionary
Lashon Hara is any remark that puts down another person or causes him damage – damage in any way! The Torah forbids speaking Lashon Hara about any fellow Jew or anyone who is amisecha (members of the nation which are together with you in the performance of Torah and Mitzvos).
Derogatory Statements
(1) Any comment which belittles someone – even if no damage was caused (for instance, the listener did not believe it).
(2) These statements are negative in all aspects and do not lift a person up or give the benefit of the doubt.
(3) The Torah also prohibits belitting another person even though you don't harm anyone.
a. ...even if the listener already knows the story
b. ...even if the story is public knowledge OR
c. ...or no one thought any less of the person being spoken about.
Damaging Statements
(1) Any comment that will cause a person either to feel bad, get physically hurt or to lose money (job, opportunity, position).
(2) These statements are negative in all aspects and do not lift a person up or give the benefit of the doubt.
Source- Beit Hashofar
בספר עלי תמר על הירושלמי שם הביא סיפור על בעל החפץ חיים ז"ל שנסע ברכבת ופגש יהודי שלא הכיר שהוא החפץ חיים וסיפר לו שהוא נוסע לבקר אצל החפץ חיים בראדין והפליג בשבחו והחפץ חיים אמר לו למה אתה הולך אליו כי אינו גדול כמו שאתה חושב אלא הוא יהודי פשוט ואותו יהודי התרגז על דבריו וחרפו וגדפו והגיע לידי הכאה ואחר כך כאשר בא לבקר את החפץ חיים בביתו השתומם לגלות שהוא האיש שאיתו רב ברכבת ובקש מחילה ואמר לו החפץ חיים שאדרבה הוא אסיר תודה לו היות וכתב ספר שלם על הלכות לשון הרע ולא עמד על ההלכה שאסור לדבר לשון הרע גם על עצמו עד שהעמידו הוא על הדבר עכ"ל הסיפור וכתב עליו בעלי תמר שיש סמוכין לזה מהירושלמי הנ"ל. ואולם אין פוסקים הלכה מתוך סיפורים וכבר כתבתי שאין ראיה מהירושלמי ומה שלא עמד על הלכה זו בספר חפץ חיים אותו נקבל כי אכן לא נמצא שם אבל מה שמשמע שחזר בו ודן דין חדש לאיסור לא נאמין לזה בלי ראיות מש"ס ופוסקים ובעיקר הסיפור בשלמא אם היה אומר לנוסע אני החפץ חיים ואיני כמו שאתה חושב אלא אני יהודי פשוט שפיר דמי ולא היתה יוצאת מזה שום תקלה אלא הנוסע היה מוסיף לו אהבה בעד ענוותנותו היתירה אבל במה שהסתיר זהותו וכאילו דיבר סרה על אחר יש בו מראית עין של לשון הרע ועוד שהכשיל את הנוסע באיסור דאורייתא של גידוף והכאה אלא בודאי אין הסיפור אמת
In the book Alei Tamar on the Yerushalmi there he brings a story about the Chofetz Chaim, that he was traveling on a train and a Jew who did not recognize that he was the Chofetz Chaim met him and told him that he was traveling to visit the Chofetz Chaim in Radin and he was effusive in his praise. And the Chofetz Chaim said to him, "why are you going to him? He is not as great as you think; he is just a simple Jew." And that Jew got angry over these words and he disgraced him and cursed him and ended up hitting him. Afterwards, when he came to visit the Chofetz Chaim in his house, he was astonished to discover that this was the man he had been with on the train, and he requested forgiveness. And the Chofetz Chaim said that on the contrary he is thankful to him, for he had written an entire book about the laws of lashon hara but had missed the law that one must not speak lashon hara about oneself, until this fellow set him straight on this. This is the end of the story.
The Alei Tamar writes on it that there is support for it from the Yerushalmi mentioned earlier. However, we do not decide halacha from stories, and I have already written that there is no proof from the Yerushalmi. And that which [was mentioned in the story] that the Chofetz Chaim missed this law in the book Chofetz Chaim, we can accept because indeed it is not to be found there. But that which it implies that he retracted and judged the law anew for prohibitiveness we will not believe without proofs from the Gemara and Poskim. And with regard to the actual story it would have been fine had he said to the traveler, "I am the Chofetz Chaim and I am not like what you think; I am just a simple Jew" and no problem would have resulted. In fact the traveler would have increased his love on account of his extra humility. But that which he hid his identity and appeared to speak badly about someone else would be maris ayin of lashon hara, plus he caused the traveler to violate the biblical prohibition of cursing and hitting. Instead, the story is certainly untrue.
Indeed, R’ Yosef Sholom Elyashiv ZT”L is cited as remarking that no prohibition exists whatsoever against verbal self-denigration. One may, in fact, speak lashon hara about oneself. R’ Elyashiv commented that to the contrary, the above story proves this position, for we see that even the Chofetz Chayim permitted himself to speak about himself. He would not have done so if it was strictly forbidden by halacha. Only in an attempt to alleviate his assailant’s humiliation did he make the comment that he was wrong for talking about himself. In truth, however, it is permissible.
Nevertheless, R’ Elyashiv insisted that this does not grant other people permission to speak about him. This is compared to a situation where one lets another steal his possessions. Undoubtedly, though, the thief who comes along and seizes his property has violated the prohibition against stealing. Similarly, the fact that a person speaks freely about his own inadequacies has no effect on the prohibition forbidding others from engaging in such talk about him.