Framing Questions:
- What parts of your life to you feel the need to balance?
- Examples could include professional/paid work; volunteer work; maintaining a home (e.g. cleaning, paying bills); caring for physical needs (e.g. exercise, nutrition); caring for emotional needs; caring for spiritual needs; education/intellectual needs; being a responsible citizen; relationships with other people (significant other, parents, children, friends, etc.), etc.
- When you think of "Work-Life Balance," what comes to mind?
- In what ways does your life currently feel balanced/imbalanced?
- What would a balanced life look like for you?
Work as an Important Part of Life
(ט) שֵׁ֤֣שֶׁת יָמִ֣ים֙ תַּֽעֲבֹ֔ד֮ וְעָשִׂ֖֣יתָ כָּל־מְלַאכְתֶּֽךָ֒ (י) וְי֙וֹם֙ הַשְּׁבִיעִ֔֜י שַׁבָּ֖֣ת ׀ לַה' אֱלֹקֶ֑֗יךָ לֹֽ֣א־תַעֲשֶׂ֣֨ה כָל־מְלָאכָ֡֜ה
(9) Six days you shall labor and do all your work, (10) but the seventh day is a Sabbath of the LORD your God: you shall not do any work
שמעיה ואבטליון קבלו מהם. שמעיה אומר אהוב את המלאכה ושנא את הרבנות ואל תתוודע לרשות.
אהוב את המלאכה כיצד? מלמד שיהא אדם אוהב את המלאכה ואל יהיה שונא את המלאכה. כשם שהתורה נתנה בברית כך המלאכה נתנה בברית, שנא׳ (שמות כ) ששת ימים תעבוד ועשית כל מלאכתך ויום השביעי שבת לה׳ אלקיך.
Avot d'Rabbi Natan 11:1
Shemaiah and Avtalyon received [the Torah] from them. Shemaiah says: Love work. Hate authority. Don’t get friendly with the government.
Love work: how so? This teaches that a person should love work and not hate work. For just as the Torah has been given as a covenant, so work has been given as a covenant. For so it is written, “Six days shalt thou labor, and do all thy work; but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord thy God; in it thou shalt not do any work.”
רבי דוסתאי אומר מניין שאם לא עשה מלאכה כל ששה שיעשה כל שבעה?
הרי שישב כל ימות השבת ולא עשה מלאכה ולערב שבת אין לו מה שיאכל. הלך ונפל בין הגייסות ותפשוהו ואחזו אותו בקולר ועשו בו מלאכה בשבת. כל זאת שלא עשה כל ששה.
Avot d'Rabbi Natan 11:1
Rabbi Dostai says, How do we know that if someone did no work on all six days, he [will end up] working on all seven days?
Lo, if he sat home all week and did not work, on Friday he ends up with nothing to eat. If then he went and joined a gang of bandits and was caught and put into chains, then he will be put to work even on the Sabbath. All this because he did not work on all of the six days of the week.
(17) May the favor of the Lord, our God, be upon us; let the work of our hands prosper, O prosper the work of our hands!
Is All Work Created Equal?
רבי מאיר אומר לעולם ילמד אדם את בנו אומנות נקיה וקלה
Rabbi Meir says: A person should always teach his son a clean and easy trade
Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi taught: There is no trade that disappears from the world. Fortunate is the one who sees their parents in an elevated trade; woe to the one who sees their parents in a lowly trade. It is impossible for the world to continue without a perfumer and without a tanner. Fortunate is the one whose trade is as a perfumer, and woe to the one whose trade is as a tanner.
מתני׳
ואלו הן הפסולין. המשחק בקובי' והמלוה בריבית ומפריחי יונים וסוחרי שביעית.
. . .
א"ר יהודה אימתי בזמן שאין להן אומנות אלא הוא אבל יש להן אומנות שלא הוא כשרין.
And these are the ones who are disqualified [from serving as witnesses] One who plays with dice [bekubbiyya] for money, and one who lends money with interest, and those who fly pigeons, and merchants who trade in the produce of the Sabbatical Year
...
Rabbi Yehuda said: When [are they disqualified]? When they have no occupation but this one. But if they have an occupation other than this one, they are fit [to bear witness]
What are We Balancing, and How?
תנינא להא דת"ר האב חייב בבנו למולו ולפדותו וללמדו תורה ולהשיאו אשה וללמדו אומנות וי"א אף להשיטו במים רבי יהודה אומר כל שאינו מלמד את בנו אומנות מלמדו ליסטות ליסטות ס"ד אלא כאילו מלמדו ליסטות:
The Sages taught in a baraita: A father is obligated with regard to his son to circumcise him, and to redeem him, and to teach him Torah, and to marry him to a woman, and to teach him a trade. And some say: also to teach him to swim.
Rabbi Yehuda says: Any father who does not teach his son a trade teaches him banditry. Can it enter your mind that he actually teaches him banditry? Rather, it is as though he teaches him banditry
(ו) הַתַּלְמִידִים יוֹצְאִין לְתַלְמוּד תּוֹרָה שֶׁלֹּא בִרְשׁוּת, שְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם. הַפּוֹעֲלִים, שַׁבָּת אֶחָת. הָעוֹנָה הָאֲמוּרָה בַתּוֹרָה, הַטַּיָּלִין, בְּכָל יוֹם. הַפּוֹעֲלִים, שְׁתַּיִם בַּשַּׁבָּת. הַחַמָּרִים, אַחַת בַּשַּׁבָּת. הַגַּמָּלִים, אַחַת לִשְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם. הַסַּפָּנִים, אַחַת לְשִׁשָּׁה חֳדָשִׁים, דִּבְרֵי רַבִּי אֱלִיעֶזֶר:
(6) Students who leave for the purpose of studying Torah without the consent of their wives [have] thirty days; laborers, one week. [The law of providing sexual] pleasure [to one's wife] that is stated in the Torah [is as follows]: one at leisure, daily; laborers, twice a week; donkey drivers, once a week; camel drivers, once every thirty days; navigators every six months; these are the words of Rabbi Eliezer.
Our Sages taught: Laborers who were working for a homeowner are still obligated to recite Shema and recite the blessings before it and after it; and when they eat their bread they are obligated to recite the blessing before and after it; and they are obligated to recite the Amida prayer. However, they do not descend before the ark as communal prayer leaders and the priests among them do not lift their hands to recite the Priestly Blessing, so as not to be derelict in the duties they were hired to perform.
(יב) כֵּיצַד. הָיָה בַּעַל אֻמָּנוּת וְהָיָה עוֹסֵק בִּמְלַאכְתּוֹ שָׁלֹשׁ שָׁעוֹת בַּיּוֹם וּבַתּוֹרָה תֵּשַׁע. אוֹתָן הַתֵּשַׁע קוֹרֵא בְּשָׁלֹשׁ מֵהֶן בַּתּוֹרָה שֶׁבִּכְתָב וּבְשָׁלֹשׁ בַּתּוֹרָה שֶׁבְּעַל פֶּה וּבְשָׁלֹשׁ אֲחֵרוֹת מִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּדַעְתּוֹ לְהָבִין דָּבָר מִדָּבָר.
(12) If one is a craftsman, he should engage himself three hours daily to his work and to Torah nine hours. Of those nine hours he should devote three hours to the study of Tanakh, and three hours to the Oral Torah and the last three hours to mental reasoning, to deduct one matter from another.
Finding the Balance
Why Weren't You More Like You?
The story is told of Zusha, the great Chassidic master, who lay crying on his deathbed. His students asked him, "Rebbe, why are you so sad? After all the mitzvot and good deeds you have done, you will surely get a great reward in heaven!"
"I'm afraid!" said Zusha. "Because when I get to heaven, I know God's not going to ask me 'Why weren't you more like Moses?' or 'Why weren't you more like King David?' But I'm afraid that God will ask 'Zusha, why weren't you more like Zusha?' And then what will I say?!"
From The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self, and Relationship by David Whyte
But work is not only necessity; good work, like a good marriage, needs a dedication to something larger than our own detailed, everyday needs; good work asks for promises to something intuited or imagined that is larger than our present understanding of it. We may not have an arranged ceremony at the altar to ritualize our dedication to work, but many of us can remember a specific moment when we realized we were made for a certain work, a certain career or a certain future: a moment when we held our hand in a fist and made unspoken vows to what we had just glimpsed. (p 25-26)