(ד) וַיִּשְׁלַ֨ח יַעֲקֹ֤ב מַלְאָכִים֙ לְפָנָ֔יו אֶל־עֵשָׂ֖ו אָחִ֑יו אַ֥רְצָה שֵׂעִ֖יר שְׂדֵ֥ה אֱדֽוֹם׃ (ה) וַיְצַ֤ו אֹתָם֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר כֹּ֣ה תֹאמְר֔וּן לַֽאדֹנִ֖י לְעֵשָׂ֑ו כֹּ֤ה אָמַר֙ עַבְדְּךָ֣ יַעֲקֹ֔ב עִם־לָבָ֣ן גַּ֔רְתִּי וָאֵחַ֖ר עַד־עָֽתָּה׃ (ו) וַֽיְהִי־לִי֙ שׁ֣וֹר וַחֲמ֔וֹר צֹ֖אן וְעֶ֣בֶד וְשִׁפְחָ֑ה וָֽאֶשְׁלְחָה֙ לְהַגִּ֣יד לַֽאדֹנִ֔י לִמְצֹא־חֵ֖ן בְּעֵינֶֽיךָ׃
(4) Jacob sent messengers ahead to his brother Esau in the land of Seir, the country of Edom, (5) and instructed them as follows, “Thus shall you say, ‘To my lord Esau, thus says your servant Jacob: I stayed with Laban and remained until now; (6) I have acquired cattle, asses, sheep, and male and female slaves; and I send this message to my lord in the hope of gaining your favor.’”
(א)גרתי. לֹא נַעֲשֵׂיתִי שַׂר וְחָשׁוּב אֶלָּא גֵּר, אֵינְךָ כְּדַאי לִשְׂנֹא אוֹתִי עַל בִּרְכַּת אָבִיךָ שֶׁבֵּרְכַנִי הֱוֵה גְבִיר לְאַחֶיךָ, שֶׁהֲרֵי לֹא נִתְקַיְּמָה בִי. דָּ"אַ גַּרְתִּי בְּגִימַטְרִיָּא תרי"ג, כְּלוֹמַר, עִם לָבָן גַּרְתִּי וְתַרְיַ"ג מִצְוֹת שָׁמַרְתִּי וְלֹא לָמַדְתִּי מִמַּעֲשָׂיו הָרָעִים:
(1) גרתי I HAVE SOJOURNED — I have become neither a prince nor other person of importance but merely a sojourner. It is not worth your while to hate me on account of the blessing of your father who blessed me (27:29) “Be master over thy brethren”, for it has not been fulfilled in me (Tanchuma Yashan 1:8:5). Another explanation: the word גרתי has the numerical value of 613 - תרי״ג - it is as much as to say, “Though I have sojourned with Laban, the wicked, I have observed the תרי״ג מצות, the 613 Divine Commandments, and I have learned naught of his evil ways.
He explains that he had learned to adopt such a wealth of animals and servants this was due to my having stayed with my uncle many years. If he had stayed in someone else’s house during all these years he would still be penniless. An alternate explanation of the line: “I have sojourned with Lavan; ”you are aware that I stayed with Lavan as my father and mother have commanded me.” He said this in order to underline that Esau should not flatter himself that he had been a fugitive from Esau’s wrath. A third alternate exegesis of these words: Esau should not be cross that he had not come sooner to pay his respects to him; the only reason for this was that he had been indentured to Lavan under contract. - Chizkuni
"His words were designed to melt even a heart of stone." - Or Ha'Chaim
Sefat Emet takes a spiritual view of the interaction here - He suggests the interaction is designed to model how we can overcome the yetzer ha'ra.
(ה) בפסוק ואשלחה להגיד לאדוני למצוא חן בעיניך אח"כ ג"כ למצוא חן בעיני אדוני. ומסתמא אמר אמת. אכן נראה שרצה להמשיך את עשו ג"כ כמ"ש הגדה לשון המשכה כגידין. ובודאי עשו לא הי' יכול להיות כיעקב. אך אם הי' דרכו של יעקב טוב בעיניו והיה מבטל עצמו אליו. הי' לו ג"כ תיקון. וזה עצמו ענין לדורון שפי' רש"י. וצריך כ"א להכין עצמו נגד היצה"ר באלה ג' דרכים ללחום ולא להניחו לשלוט עליו ח"ו. ועכ"ז לא יסמוך על עצמו רק לבקש רחמים ותחנונים לפני הבורא ית' להצילו מיצה"ר ותחבולותיו כמ"ש אם אין הקב"ה עוזרו לא יכול לו. וגם לדורון פי' לעורר רחמנות גם על תאוות רעות למה יהי' נמצא בעולם דברים שקרים ונפרדים מן השורש הלא הכל שלו והכל מעשי ידיו של הבורא ית' והכל לכבודו ברא. לכן צריך כל אחד לבקש לתיקון הכולל לבד תיקון עצמותו ולתקן ג"כ היצה"ר ולהכניע כל הסט"א וזהו לדורון:
(5) "And I have sent these to you to find favor in your eyes” (Genesis 32:5). Later, it repeats, “To find favor in the eyes of my master” (Genesis 32:8). Yaakov was likely truthful, aiming to draw Eisav closer, as the word הגדה implies drawing out, like sinews. Although Eisav could not reach Yaakov's spiritual level, if he found Yaakov’s path appealing and nullified himself to it, he too would achieve rectification. This is the idea behind the gifts, as Rashi explains.
Each person must prepare against the evil inclination through appeasement, gifts, and battle, to prevent it from controlling their life. However, one cannot rely solely on personal efforts and must beseech Hashem for mercy to overcome the evil inclination and its tricks, as our sages state: "If Hashem does not help, one cannot prevail" (Kiddushin 30b). The concept of gifts also involves awakening Hashem’s mercy on negative desires, recognizing that everything, even those seemingly disconnected from the divine, belongs to Him and was created for His glory. Thus, one should seek comprehensive rectification, not only personal salvation but also the subjugation of all evil forces.
Each person must prepare against the evil inclination through appeasement, gifts, and battle, to prevent it from controlling their life. However, one cannot rely solely on personal efforts and must beseech Hashem for mercy to overcome the evil inclination and its tricks, as our sages state: "If Hashem does not help, one cannot prevail" (Kiddushin 30b). The concept of gifts also involves awakening Hashem’s mercy on negative desires, recognizing that everything, even those seemingly disconnected from the divine, belongs to Him and was created for His glory. Thus, one should seek comprehensive rectification, not only personal salvation but also the subjugation of all evil forces." - Sefat Emet
(ז) וַיָּשֻׁ֙בוּ֙ הַמַּלְאָכִ֔ים אֶֽל־יַעֲקֹ֖ב לֵאמֹ֑ר בָּ֤אנוּ אֶל־אָחִ֙יךָ֙ אֶל־עֵשָׂ֔ו וְגַם֙ הֹלֵ֣ךְ לִקְרָֽאתְךָ֔ וְאַרְבַּע־מֵא֥וֹת אִ֖ישׁ עִמּֽוֹ׃ (ח) וַיִּירָ֧א יַעֲקֹ֛ב מְאֹ֖ד וַיֵּ֣צֶר ל֑וֹ וַיַּ֜חַץ אֶת־הָעָ֣ם אֲשֶׁר־אִתּ֗וֹ וְאֶת־הַצֹּ֧אן וְאֶת־הַבָּקָ֛ר וְהַגְּמַלִּ֖ים לִשְׁנֵ֥י מַחֲנֽוֹת׃
(7) The messengers returned to Jacob, saying, “We came to your brother Esau; he himself is coming to meet you, and his retinue numbers four hundred.” (8)Jacob was greatly frightened; in his anxiety, he divided the people with him, and the flocks and herds and camels, into two camps,
(א)ויירא ויצר. וַיִּירָא שֶׁמָּא יֵהָרֵג, וַיֵּצֶר לוֹ אִם יַהֲרֹג הוּא אֶת אֲחֵרִים (בראשית רבה ותנחומא):
(1) ויירא...ויצר HE FEARED GREATLY AND WAS DISTRESSED — He was afraid lest he be killed, and he was distressed that he might have to kill someone (Genesis Rabbah 76:2).
"Yaakov was very frightened. When Yaakov realized that he was afraid despite Hashem’s assurance, he reckoned that he was not worthy of miraculous salvation and began preparing naturalistic stratagems instead." - Malbim
"Seeing that twenty years earlier G’d had assured him in the dream of the ladder that He would be with him and would protect him, why did he have any reason to be afraid at all? Our sages answer that Yaakov never considered G’d’s promise as ironclad but as subject to his conducting himself as worthy of it. Yaakov worried that he might have committed sins during the last twenty years which had invalidated G’d’s promise to him." - Rabbenu Bahya
"And do not cross the toll-collectors and get arrestedand put your dignity and your life at risk. ou shall not stand in a place of danger and rely upon a miracle, but always fear lest it cause you to sin. But remember our father Jacob, "Then Jacob was greatly afraid and distressed…" (Gen. 32:8)." - Sefer HaYirah 252
שאין סומכין על הנס:
We should not rely on miracles.