The Ivri Path: (2) Ahava

2. AHAVALove the strangerOffering wise love to that which is estranged within our hearts, within our communities, and within our histories

ויקרא י״ט:ל״ד

(לד) כְּאֶזְרָ֣ח מִכֶּם֩ יִהְיֶ֨ה לָכֶ֜ם הַגֵּ֣ר ׀ הַגָּ֣ר אִתְּכֶ֗ם וְאָהַבְתָּ֥ לוֹ֙ כָּמ֔וֹךָ כִּֽי־גֵרִ֥ים הֱיִיתֶ֖ם בְּאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרָ֑יִם אֲנִ֖י יהוה אֱלֹהֵיכֶֽם׃

Leviticus 19:34

(34) The strangers who reside with you shall be to you as your citizens; you shall love each one as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I יהוה am your God.

דברים י׳:י״ט

(יט) וַאֲהַבְתֶּ֖ם אֶת־הַגֵּ֑ר כִּֽי־גֵרִ֥ים הֱיִיתֶ֖ם בְּאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם׃

Deuteronomy 10:19

(19) You too must befriend the stranger, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt.

דברים כ״ד:י״ז

(יז) לֹ֣א תַטֶּ֔ה מִשְׁפַּ֖ט גֵּ֣ר...

Deuteronomy 24:17

(17) You shall not subvert the rights of the stranger...

דברים כ״ו:י״א

(יא) וְשָׂמַחְתָּ֣ בְכׇל־הַטּ֗וֹב אֲשֶׁ֧ר נָֽתַן־לְךָ֛ יהוה אֱלֹהֶ֖יךָ וּלְבֵיתֶ֑ךָ אַתָּה֙ וְהַלֵּוִ֔י וְהַגֵּ֖ר אֲשֶׁ֥ר בְּקִרְבֶּֽךָ׃ {ס}

Deuteronomy 26:11

(11) And you shall enjoy, together with the [family of the] Levite and the stranger in your midst, all the bounty that your God יהוה has bestowed upon you and your household.

Introduction to Rabbi Samson Rafael's Commentary on the Torahby Rabbi Dr Joseph Breuerp43-44[I]n the world of Avrohom, all around him, country and nation had become idols whom the individual served and whose glory and greatness were the highest aim in life. There was no room for G'd and His Divine will. The consciousness of Gd's existence had all but disappeared.It was Avrohom's task to voice the loudest opposition against such a world. He had to renounce it, had to become a voluntary stranger and had to summon courage lech lecha to walk alone. His life became meaningful by being devoted to G'd and through the fulfillment of His Divine will in deep confidence in the Divine leadership. It is this courage and determination that have to motivate every true Jew whenever it should become necessary to walk "alone."”

Who is a Sodomite?

יחזקאל ט״ז:מ״ט

(מט) הִנֵּה־זֶ֣ה הָיָ֔ה עֲוֺ֖ן סְדֹ֣ם אֲחוֹתֵ֑ךְ גָּא֨וֹן שִׂבְעַת־לֶ֜חֶם וְשַׁלְוַ֣ת הַשְׁקֵ֗ט הָ֤יָה לָהּ֙ וְלִבְנוֹתֶ֔יהָ וְיַד־עָנִ֥י וְאֶבְי֖וֹן לֹ֥א הֶחֱזִֽיקָה׃

Ezekiel 16:49

(49) Only this was the sin of your sister Sodom: arrogance! She and her daughters had plenty of bread and untroubled tranquility; yet she did not support the poor and the needy.

סנהדרין ק״ט ב

...הָוְיָא לְהוּ פּוּרְיְיתָא דַּהֲווֹ מַגְנִי עֲלַהּ אוֹרְחִין. כִּי מַאֲרֵיךְ – גָּיְיזִי לֵיהּ, כִּי גוּץ – מָתְחִין לֵיהּ...

Sanhedrin 109b

...The Gemara discusses the sins of the people of Sodom: They had beds on which they would lay their guests; when a guest was longer than the bed they would cut him, and when a guest was shorter than the bed they would stretch him....

The stranger within

שיחות הר"ן ע״ז

(א) כָּל הָעוֹלָם מָלֵא מַחֲלוֹקוֹת...
(ה) וְדַע, שֶׁהַכֹּל אֶחָד.
(ו) שֶׁהַמַּחֲלֹקֶת שֶׁבִּפְרָטִיּוּת בֵּין אִישׁ וּבֵיתוֹ וְכַיּוֹצֵא כַּנַּ"ל הוּא גַּם־כֵּן מַמָּשׁ הַמַּחֲלֹקֶת שֶׁבֵּין הַמְּלָכִים וְהָאֻמּוֹת.
(ז) כִּי כָּל אֶחָד מֵאַנְשֵׁי בֵּיתוֹ, הוּא בְּחִינַת אֻמָּה מְיֻחֶדֶת וְהֵם מִתְגָּרִין זֶה עִם זֶה, כְּמוֹ שֶׁיֵּשׁ מִלְחָמוֹת בֵּין הָאֻמּוֹת...
(יב) כִּי הָאָדָם בְּעַצְמוֹ הוּא עוֹלָם קָטָן, וְנִכְלָל בּוֹ כָּל הָעוֹלָם וּמְלוֹאוֹ, מִכָּל־שֶׁכֵּן הָאָדָם וּבֵיתוֹ שֶׁנִּכְלָלִין בָּהֶם כָּל הָאֻמּוֹת וְנִלְחָמִין וּמִתְגָּרִין זֶה בָּזֶה כַּנַּ"ל.
(יג) וְעַל־כֵּן לִפְעָמִים כְּשֶׁאֶחָד יוֹשֵׁב לְבַדּוֹ בַּיַּעַר יָכוֹל לִהְיוֹת שֶׁיִּהְיֶה נַעֲשֶׂה מְשֻׁגָּע.
(יד) וְזֶה נַעֲשֶׂה מֵחֲמַת שֶׁהוּא לְבַדּוֹ וְנִכְלָלִין בּוֹ לְבַד כָּל הָאֻמּוֹת, וְהֵם מִתְגָּרִין זֶה בָּזֶה וְהוּא מֻכְרָח לְהִשְׁתַּנּוֹת בְּכָל פַּעַם לִבְחִינַת אֻמָּה אַחֶרֶת כְּפִי הִתְגַּבְּרוּת אֻמָּה עַל אֻמָּה שֶׁהֵם כֻּלָּם נִכְלָלִין בּוֹ לְבַדּוֹ. וּמֵחֲמַת זֶה יָכוֹל לְהִשְׁתַּגֵּעַ לְגַמְרֵי מֵחֲמַת הִתְהַפְּכוּת הַדֵּעוֹת שֶׁבּוֹ, עַל־יְדֵי הִתְגָּרוּת הָאֻמּוֹת שֶׁנִּכְלָלִין בּוֹ לְבַדּוֹ כַּנַּ"ל...

Sichot HaRan 77

(1) The world is full of strife...
(5) All strife is identical.
(6) The friction within a family is a counterpart of the wars between nations.
(7) Each person in a household is the counterpart of a world power, and their quarrels are the wars between those powers...
(12) A person is a miniature world (Zohar III, 33b; Tikkuney Zohar #69, 100b). Their essence contains the world and everything in it. A person and their family contain the nations of the world, including all their battles.
(13) That's why there are times that a person sits by themselves in the forest and they can become insane.
(14) Within them are all the warring nations. Their personality at a particular time is that of the victorious nation. Each time a different nation is victorious, they must change since they play the roles of all the nations, and this can drive them insane. They are alone and cannot express the war within...

Dr. Richard C. SchwartzNo Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model

How we relate in the inner world will be how we relate in the outer. If we can appreciate and have compassion for our parts, even for the ones we’ve considered to be enemies, we can do the same for people who resemble them. On the other hand, if we hate or disdain our parts, we’ll do the same with anyone who reminds us of them.

Rebbeca SolnitFB post Oct 16, 2023

Have you said good morning to the strangers in your midst yet? There are an estimated three trillion trees on earth; there are about ten times that number of cells with human DNA in your body; they are greatly outnumbered by cells in you that don't have human or even animal DNA; you are a complex community, a plural being, a galaxy of strangenesses, a self that is mostly other, lurching along somehow mostly contained within your skin and making I statements.

"An estimated 30 trillion cells in your body—less than a third—are human. The other 70-90% are bacterial and fungal. Ninety-nine percent of the unique genes in your body are bacterial. Only about one percent is human."

art by Gaby D'Allesandro / © AMNH

Carl Jung

Wholeness is not achieved by cutting off a portion of one’s being, but by integration of the contraries.

The stranger within our communities

R' Jonathan SacksThe Dignity of Difference: How to Avoid the Clash of Civilizations

“We encounter God in the face of a stranger. That, I believe, is the Hebrew Bible’s single greatest and most counterintuitive contribution to ethics. God creates difference; therefore it is in one-who-is-different that we meet god."

Degel Machane EphraimParshas Behar [I]t is known that the Holy One Blessed be He is like a ger (stranger) in this world, because He does not have anyone to rest His presence on, since we are limited...This is the meaning of the verse [in Leviticus], “You are but strangers resident with Me.” When you are a ger in this world and a resident in the next, then you are with Me, because I too am a ger in this world.

The stranger within our histories

a *very* partial list Lilith: "Dangerous demon"? First woman who refused to submit
Asherah: "Idol worship"? Feminine face of the Divine beloved to ancient mothers and aunties
Shabbatai Tzvi and Sarah Ashkenazi: 17th century "false" messiah? Liberatory powerhouses---created first feminist movement in Western society

אוצר מדרשים, אלפא ביתא דבן סירא, אלפא ביתא אחרת לבן סירא ל״ד

(לד) ה׳) א״ל המלאכים הממונים לרפואה סנוי סנסנוי סמנגלוף (11). כשברא הקב״ה אדם הראשון יחיד, אמר לא טוב היות האדם לבדו, ברא לו אשה מן האדמה כמוהו וקראה לילית, מיד התחילו מתגרין זה בזה, אמרה היא איני שוכבת למטה, והוא אומר איני שוכב למטה אלא למעלה שאת ראויה למטה ואני למעלה, אמרה לו שנינו שוין לפי ששנינו מאדמה, ולא היו שומעין זה לזה, כיון שראתה לילית אמרה שם המפורש ופרחה באויר העולם, עמד אדם בתפלה לפני קונו ואמר, רבש״ע אשה שנתת לי ברחה ממני, מיד שגר הקב״ה שלשה מלאכים הללו אחריה להחזירה, אמר לו הקב״ה אם תרצה לחזור מוטב, ואם לאו תקבל על עצמה שימותו מבניה בכל יום מאה בנים, עזבו אותה והלכו אחריה והשיגוה בתוך הים במים עזים שעתידין המצריים לטבוע בו וספרוה דבר יהוה ולא רצתה לחזור, אמרו לה אנו נטביעך בים, אמרה להם הניחוני שלא נבראתי אלא להחליש התינוקות כשהן משמונה ימים מיום שיולד אשלוט בו אם הוא זכר, ואם נקבה מיום ילדותה עד עשרים יום. וכששמעו דבריה הפצירו לקחתה, נשבעת להם בשם אל חי וקיים שכל זמן שאני רואה אתכם או שמכם או תבניתכם בקמיע לא אשלוט באותו התינוק, וקבלה על עצמה שימותו מבניה מאה בכל יום, לפיכך בכל יום מתים מאה מן השדים, ולכך אנו כותבים שמותם בקמיע של נערים קטנים ורואה אותם וזוכרת השבועה ומתרפא הילד.

Otzar Midrashim, The Aleph Bet of ben Sira, The Alphabet of ben Sira, (alternative version) 34

(34) ה He said to him, "The angels appointed for healing: Sanoy, Sansanoy, Semangalof. When the Holy Blessed One created the first Adam alone, They said, (Genesis 2:18) 'It is not good for this Adam to be alone.' They created for him a wife out of the Earth like he had been, and called her Lilith. Immediately they began to challenge each other. She said, 'I will not lie below,' and he said, 'I will not lie beneath you, but only on top. For you are fit only to be in the bottom position, while I am to be the superior one.' Lilith responded, 'We are equal to each other inasmuch as we were both created from the Earth.' But they would not listen to one another. When Lilith saw this, she pronounced the Ineffable Name and flew away into the world's air. Adam stood in prayer before his Creator and said, 'Sovereign of the universe! The woman you gave me has run away from me.' Immediately, the Holy Blessed One sent these three angels to bring her back. The Holy Blessed One said to Adam, 'If she agrees to come back, good. If not, she must permit one hundred of her children to die every day.' They departed and pursued her, and overtook her in the midst of the sea, in the mighty waters wherein the Egyptians would ultimately drown. They told her God's word, but she did not wish to return. The angels said, 'We shall drown you in the sea.' She said to them, 'Let me be. I was created only to cause illness to infants. I have dominion over them for eight days after birth if they are male, and if female, after birth for twenty days.' When the angels heard Lilith's words, they insisted on taking her. But she swore to them by the name of the living and eternal God, 'Whenever I see you or your names or your forms in an amulet, I will have no power over that infant.' She also agreed to have one hundred of her children die every day. Accordingly, every day one hundred demons perish, and for the same reason, we write their names on the amulets of young children, and she sees them, she remembers her oath, and the child is healed."

ספר הזהר, בראשית פ״א:ר״י-רי״א

(ב) כְּתִיב, (דברים ט״ז:כ״א) לֹא תִטַּע לְךָ אֲשֵׁרָה כָּל עֵץ אֵצֶל מִזְבַּח יהוה אֱלֹהֶיךָ אֲשֶׁר תַּעֲשֶׂה לָּךְ. אֵצֶל מִזְבַּח, וְכִי לְעֵילָא מִנֵּיהּ אוֹ בְּאֲתַר אָחֳרָא מָאן שַׁרְיָיה. אֶלָּא הָא אוֹקִימְנָא (קפ"ב ע"ב) אֲשֶׁר דָּא בַּעֲלָהּ דְּאִתְּתָא (ד"א ה"א) אִתְקְרִיאַת עַל שׁוּם בַּעֲלָהּ אֲשֵׁרָה... בְּגִין כָּךְ כְּתִיב לא תִטַּע לְךָ אֲשֵׁרָה כָּל עֵץ אֵצֶל מִזְבַּח יהוה אֱלהֶיךָ... אִי הָכִי אַמַּאי אִתְעֲבַר שְׁמָא דָא. אֶלָּא אֲשֵׁרָה עַל שׁוּם דִּכְתִיב (בראשית ל׳:י״ג) בְּאָשְׁרִי כִּי אִשְׁרוּנִי בָנוֹת וְהוּא (ד"א הא) דְּלָא אַשְׁרוּהָ שְׁאָר עַמִּין וְקָיְימָא אָחֳרָא תְּחוֹתָהּ,...

Zohar, Bereshit 81:210-211

It's written in Deuteronomy, ‘”You shall not plant for yourselves an Asherah or any kind of tree next to the altar of your God, YHVH,which/asher you shall make for yourselves.”
Are we to suppose that anywhere else it is permitted [to plant an Asherah]?
[Of course not!] The truth is that the "H’" [in God's name "YHVH'"] is called Asherah, after the name of its spouse, Asher...
The meaning of the verse is therefore: “You shall not plant another Asherah next to the altar of your God, YHVH, this[altar which is an Asherah].”...If this is so (that Asherah is the name of the feminine aspect of God), why do we not commonly use is as a sacred name?
The reason is that this name brings to mind the words of [mother] Leah, “Happy am I, for the daughters will call me happy (ishruni), (Gen 30:13)” but [our people] are not “called happy” by other nations, and another nation is set up in its place...
HRK Jill Hammer's translation

Rabbi Jericho Vincent Guest Post: The Messianic Feminism of Shabbatai Zevi and Sarah Ashkenazi; Life is a Sacred Text

...Shabbatai Tzvi and Sarah 1626-1676 Liberatory giants! A Sephardic/Ashkanazi duo of Kabbalists in Turkey who ran a wildly successful messianic campaign anchored in sensual embodiment and female liberation. After they were forced to convert to Islam on pain of death, Shabbatai Tzvi was maligned as a “false” messiah, but Shabbatai Tzvi and Sarah’s wisdom, courage, and ideas shaped the Chasidic and progressive Jewish movements that followed. We owe them a huge and unpaid debt of gratitude.

What is love?

בראשית רבה כ״ד:ז׳

(ז) רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא אוֹמֵר (ויקרא יט, יח): וְאָהַבְתָּ לְרֵעֲךָ כָּמוֹךָ, זֶה כְּלַל גָּדוֹל בַּתּוֹרָה, שֶׁלֹא תֹאמַר הוֹאִיל וְנִתְבַּזֵּיתִי יִתְבַּזֶה חֲבֵרִי עִמִּי, הוֹאִיל וְנִתְקַלַּלְתִּי יִתְקַלֵּל חֲבֵרִי עִמִּי. אָמַר רַבִּי תַּנְחוּמָא אִם עָשִׂיתָ כֵּן דַּע לְמִי אַתָּה מְבַזֶּה בִּדְמוּת אֱלֹהִים עָשָׂה אוֹתוֹ.

Bereshit Rabbah 24:7

(7) Rabbi Akiva says: “Love your neighbors as yourself” (Leviticus 19:18) – this is the greatest principle of truth/Torah. You should not say: Since I have been disparaged, let someone else be disparaged along with me; since I was cursed, let someone else be cursed along with me. Rabbi Tanḥuma said: If you do act like that, know who it is that you are disgracing: “in the likeness of God He made him” (Genesis 5:1).

Rav Jericho Vincent

Love flourishes when the softness of the heart---chesed---and its capacities of openness, tenderness, and overflowing compassion, are well balanced with the strength of the spine---geveurah---strength, discernment, and boundaries.

בראשית רבה נ״ד:ג׳

(ג) ...רַבִּי יוֹסֵי בַּר חֲנִינָא דְּאָמַר כָּל אַהֲבָה שֶׁאֵין עִמָּהּ תּוֹכָחָה אֵינָהּ אַהֲבָה...

Bereshit Rabbah 54:3

(3)Rabbi Yosei bar Ḥanina said: Any love that is not accompanied by reprimand is not [true] love...

ALOKInstagram

Insecurity festers beneath your insults. I show you that joy and community are possible without compromise or self-denial. That threatens you because it is easier to believe that misery and loneliness are the only ways to live. Your wound is my garden, I have found life here in the places you have left for dead. Let’s bloom together. I love you.

PRACTICE

Be a beacon of love to the stranger.

INCANTATION

ואהבת לרעך כמוך זה כלל גדול בתורה

V’ahavta lah-rei’acha kamocha ze klal gadol batorah

Love other people like you love yourself this is the greatest principle of truth