"Hooking up" or Getting "Hooked" on Idols? a horrifyingly necessary collection of sources against sexual impropriety with gentiles
(א) וַיֵּ֥שֶׁב יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל בַּשִּׁטִּ֑ים וַיָּ֣חֶל הָעָ֔ם לִזְנ֖וֹת אֶל־בְּנ֥וֹת מוֹאָֽב׃
(1) While Israel was staying at Shittim, the menfolk*menfolk NJPS “people”; cf. Exod. 14.6, Num. 21.33. See the Dictionary under ‘am. profaned themselves by whoring*profaned themselves by whoring Others “began to commit harlotry.” with the Moabite women,
(ג) ויחל העם. עשה קדושתו חול, כלשון (בראשית ט׳:כ׳) ויחל נח, שהרי הגדור מהעריות נקרא קדוש והזונה הפך ממנו. וכל מקום שנאמר העם לשון גנאי הוא, (במדבר י״א:א׳) ויהי העם כמתאוננים, (שם כ) וירב העם, (שם כא) וידבר העם באלהים, (שם יד) עד אנה ינאצוני העם. וכל מקום שנאמר עמי לשון שבח הוא (תהלים פא) לו עמי שומע לי, (שמות ז׳:ד׳) והוצאתי את צבאותי את עמי, (ישעיהו מ׳:א׳) נחמו נחמו עמי, כך דרשו בתנחומא.
(3) ויחל העם, “the people profaned themselves.” The word ויחל means to profane something which previously was sacred, holy. We encounter the same word in connection with Noach (Genesis 9,2), when Noach planted a vineyard and became drunk. Judaism describes people who are meticulous in their sexual mores as ”holy,” whereas those that are not are considered as “profane.” Whenever the Torah refers to the Israelites simply as העם, this term implies a criticism of their spiritual level (at that time). The Following are some examples of the Torah using this terminology: Numbers 11,1: “the people were looking for something to complain about.” Numbers 20,3: “the people quarrelled.” Numbers 21,5: “the people spoke out against G’d.” On the other hand, whenever the people of Israel are referred to as עמי, this is to be taken as a complimentary term; examples are: Psalms 81,14: “if only My people would listen to Me.” Exodus 7,4: “I will take out the hosts of My people.” Isaiah 40,1: “comfort, comfort My people.”

Israel's impropriety with non-Jews leads to idol worship:

(ב) ויחל העם לזנות אל בנות מואב. אומרו ויחל לשון חילול שנתחלל לזנות פירוש לפי שזנו אחרי אלהי נכר, ואמר אל בנות וגו' פירוש על דרך אומרם ז"ל (מד"ר ותנחומא שם) שהיו תובעים אותם לעבירה והיו אומרים להם השתחוה לזה וגו' והיו משתחוים אל אשר היו אומרים להם בנות מואב, והוא אומרו אל בנות וגו', ודקדק הכתוב לומר העם, לשלול הצדיקים אשר בשם ישראל יתכנו:
(2) ויתל העם לזנות אל בנות מואב, The people debased themselves to commit harlotry with the daughters of Moav. The word ויחל may be understood as profaning oneself. The word זנות implies the straying after alien deities. The reason the Torah coined the unusual construction אל בנות, instead of עם בנות, or something similar, has been explained by Tanchuma to indicate that the daughters of Moav did not offer themselves to the Israelites without conditions, but demanded that these first commit an act of obeisance to one of their deities. The Torah hints by the word אל that the Israelites who became guilty of this extracurricular sex had first bowed TO something that the daughters of Moav customarily bowed to. The Torah makes a point of describing the Israelites who became guilty of this aberration as only העם. The spiritual elite, who are customarily referred to as Israelites, was not involved.
(ב) בשטים. אמר רבי אלעזר שטים שמה ור' יהושע אומר שעסקו במעשה שטות:
(2) בשטים, according to Rabbi Elazar this had been the name of that place already previously. Rabbi Yoshua disagrees and says that it was so named after what happened there, i.e. that many Israelites committed the ultimate folly, shtuss, of sleeping around with gentiles and prostrating themselves to idols; [in order to please their partners who considered this as payment for granting them sexual favours. Ed.]
(א) ויחל העם לזנות. תחלת ענינם לא היה לעבוד ע"ז כלל אבל היה לזנות בלבד. אמנם קרה להם כמו שהעידה התורה כשאסרה להתחתן באומות כאמרו וקרא לך ואכלת מזבחו ולקחת מבנותיו וזנו בנותיו והזנו את בניך אחרי אלהיהן:
(1) ויחל העם לזנות, originally, there had been no intention of committing idolatrous acts at all. All that the males had intended was to indulge their libido with the womenfolk who made themselves available. However, these people fell victim to precisely the warning of the Torah in Exodus 34,15-16 of what would happen if Jews would allow the Canaanites to remain in their country and conclude a covenant with them. They would be invited to their social gatherings resulting in their eating forbidden foods, and eventually intermarriage followed by lip service to their gods.

Pinchas rectifies the profanity created through this impropriety:

(ו) וְהִנֵּ֡ה אִישׁ֩ מִבְּנֵ֨י יִשְׂרָאֵ֜ל בָּ֗א וַיַּקְרֵ֤ב אֶל־אֶחָיו֙ אֶת־הַמִּדְיָנִ֔ית לְעֵינֵ֣י מֹשֶׁ֔ה וּלְעֵינֵ֖י כׇּל־עֲדַ֣ת בְּנֵי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֑ל וְהֵ֣מָּה בֹכִ֔ים פֶּ֖תַח אֹ֥הֶל מוֹעֵֽד׃ (ז) וַיַּ֗רְא פִּֽינְחָס֙ בֶּן־אֶלְעָזָ֔ר בֶּֽן־אַהֲרֹ֖ן הַכֹּהֵ֑ן וַיָּ֙קׇם֙ מִתּ֣וֹךְ הָֽעֵדָ֔ה וַיִּקַּ֥ח רֹ֖מַח בְּיָדֽוֹ׃ (ח) וַ֠יָּבֹ֠א אַחַ֨ר אִֽישׁ־יִשְׂרָאֵ֜ל אֶל־הַקֻּבָּ֗ה וַיִּדְקֹר֙ אֶת־שְׁנֵיהֶ֔ם אֵ֚ת אִ֣ישׁ יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל וְאֶת־הָאִשָּׁ֖ה אֶל־קֳבָתָ֑הּ וַתֵּֽעָצַר֙ הַמַּגֵּפָ֔ה מֵעַ֖ל בְּנֵ֥י יִשְׂרָאֵֽל׃
(6) Just then a certain Israelite man*man Lit. “participant whose involvement defines the depicted situation.” came and brought a Midianite woman over to his companions, in the sight of Moses and of the whole Israelite community who were weeping at the entrance of the Tent of Meeting. (7) When Phinehas, son of Eleazar son of Aaron the priest, saw this, he left the assembly and, taking a spear in his hand, (8) he followed the Israelite man into the chamber and stabbed both of them, the Israelite man and the woman, through the belly. Then the plague against the Israelites was checked.
(ב) ושמא באה הדגשה יתרה זו כדי להבליט את העוול שבמעשהו - ישראל ומדינית! (פ' מטות מסעי תש"ן)
(א) וידקר את שניהם וגו'. קשה בשלמא דקירת איש ישראל כמשפט ההלכה שקנאים פוגעים בו אבל האשה אינה חייבת מיתה ואינה מצווה, ואם על חששת היותה אשת איש לא היתה נהרגת על הספק, ואפשר שדן בה משפט הבהמה דכתיב (ויקרא כ׳:ט״ו-ט״ז) ואת הבהמה תהרוגו, וכתיב (יחזקאל כ״ג:כ׳) אשר בשר חמורים בשרם.
(1) וידקר את שניהם, He stabbed them both. We can understand that Pinchas had a legal excuse to kill the Israelite who indulged in sex with a Gentile woman; however, what right did he have to kill the woman? There is no known halachah which excuses such a deed! If Pinchas suspected that Kosbi was married and as such had made herself guilty of adultery, who has ever heard of executing someone on the basis of such an assumption? Perhaps Pinchas applied the law applicable to animals to Kosbi. We have learned in Leviticus 20,15 that when humans and animals indulge in mutual sex even the animal has to be executed. We are also told in Ezekiel 23,20 that the flesh of Gentiles is equated with the flesh of donkeys.

If the comparison of gentile and donkey flesh isn't satisfactory to turn one away from this unclean matter, we see from the Ohr HaChaim that there is legal standing to give a Jew the death penalty for engaging in sexual acts with a non-Jew.

(א) כִּ֤י יְבִֽיאֲךָ֙ יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֶ֔יךָ אֶל־הָאָ֕רֶץ אֲשֶׁר־אַתָּ֥ה בָא־שָׁ֖מָּה לְרִשְׁתָּ֑הּ וְנָשַׁ֣ל גּֽוֹיִם־רַבִּ֣ים ׀ מִפָּנֶ֡יךָ הַֽחִתִּי֩ וְהַגִּרְגָּשִׁ֨י וְהָאֱמֹרִ֜י וְהַכְּנַעֲנִ֣י וְהַפְּרִזִּ֗י וְהַֽחִוִּי֙ וְהַיְבוּסִ֔י שִׁבְעָ֣ה גוֹיִ֔ם רַבִּ֥ים וַעֲצוּמִ֖ים מִמֶּֽךָּ׃ (ב) וּנְתָנָ֞ם יְהֹוָ֧ה אֱלֹהֶ֛יךָ לְפָנֶ֖יךָ וְהִכִּיתָ֑ם הַחֲרֵ֤ם תַּחֲרִים֙ אֹתָ֔ם לֹא־תִכְרֹ֥ת לָהֶ֛ם בְּרִ֖ית וְלֹ֥א תְחׇנֵּֽם׃ (ג) וְלֹ֥א תִתְחַתֵּ֖ן בָּ֑ם בִּתְּךָ֙ לֹא־תִתֵּ֣ן לִבְנ֔וֹ וּבִתּ֖וֹ לֹא־תִקַּ֥ח לִבְנֶֽךָ׃ (ד) כִּֽי־יָסִ֤יר אֶת־בִּנְךָ֙ מֵֽאַחֲרַ֔י וְעָבְד֖וּ אֱלֹהִ֣ים אֲחֵרִ֑ים וְחָרָ֤ה אַף־יְהֹוָה֙ בָּכֶ֔ם וְהִשְׁמִידְךָ֖ מַהֵֽר׃
(1) When your God יהוה brings you to the land that you are about to enter and possess, and [God] dislodges many nations before you—the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites, seven nations much larger than you— (2) and your God יהוה delivers them to you and you defeat them, you must doom them to destruction: grant them no terms and give them no quarter. (3) You shall not intermarry with them: do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons. (4) For they will turn your children away from Me to worship other gods, and יהוה’s anger will blaze forth against you, promptly wiping you out.

Pashut Pshat: Sexual impropriety with non Jews leads to idolatry.

Of all people- Shlomo HaMelech, who was (מלכים א ה יא): "וַיֶּחְכַּם מִכָּל הָאָדָם", falls to this:

(א) וְהַמֶּ֣לֶךְ שְׁלֹמֹ֗ה אָהַ֞ב נָשִׁ֧ים נׇכְרִיּ֛וֹת רַבּ֖וֹת וְאֶת־בַּת־פַּרְעֹ֑ה מוֹאֲבִיּ֤וֹת עַמֳּנִיּוֹת֙ אֲדֹ֣מִיֹּ֔ת צֵֽדְנִיֹּ֖ת חִתִּיֹּֽת׃ (ב) מִן־הַגּוֹיִ֗ם אֲשֶׁ֣ר אָֽמַר־יְהֹוָה֩ אֶל־בְּנֵ֨י יִשְׂרָאֵ֜ל לֹא־תָבֹ֣אוּ בָהֶ֗ם וְהֵם֙ לֹא־יָבֹ֣אוּ בָכֶ֔ם אָכֵן֙ יַטּ֣וּ אֶת־לְבַבְכֶ֔ם אַחֲרֵ֖י אֱלֹהֵיהֶ֑ם בָּהֶ֛ם דָּבַ֥ק שְׁלֹמֹ֖ה לְאַהֲבָֽה׃ (ג) וַיְהִי־ל֣וֹ נָשִׁ֗ים שָׂרוֹת֙ שְׁבַ֣ע מֵא֔וֹת וּפִלַגְשִׁ֖ים שְׁלֹ֣שׁ מֵא֑וֹת וַיַּטּ֥וּ נָשָׁ֖יו אֶת־לִבּֽוֹ׃ (ד) וַיְהִ֗י לְעֵת֙ זִקְנַ֣ת שְׁלֹמֹ֔ה נָשָׁיו֙ הִטּ֣וּ אֶת־לְבָב֔וֹ אַחֲרֵ֖י אֱלֹהִ֣ים אֲחֵרִ֑ים וְלֹא־הָיָ֨ה לְבָב֤וֹ שָׁלֵם֙ עִם־יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהָ֔יו כִּלְבַ֖ב דָּוִ֥יד אָבִֽיו׃ (ה) וַיֵּ֣לֶךְ שְׁלֹמֹ֔ה אַחֲרֵ֣י עַשְׁתֹּ֔רֶת אֱלֹהֵ֖י צִדֹנִ֑ים וְאַחֲרֵ֣י מִלְכֹּ֔ם שִׁקֻּ֖ץ עַמֹּנִֽים׃ (ו) וַיַּ֧עַשׂ שְׁלֹמֹ֛ה הָרַ֖ע בְּעֵינֵ֣י יְהֹוָ֑ה וְלֹ֥א מִלֵּ֛א אַחֲרֵ֥י יְהֹוָ֖ה כְּדָוִ֥ד אָבִֽיו׃ {ס} (ז) אָז֩ יִבְנֶ֨ה שְׁלֹמֹ֜ה בָּמָ֗ה לִכְמוֹשׁ֙ שִׁקֻּ֣ץ מוֹאָ֔ב בָּהָ֕ר אֲשֶׁ֖ר עַל־פְּנֵ֣י יְרֽוּשָׁלָ֑͏ִם וּלְמֹ֕לֶךְ שִׁקֻּ֖ץ בְּנֵ֥י עַמּֽוֹן׃ (ח) וְכֵ֣ן עָשָׂ֔ה לְכׇל־נָשָׁ֖יו הַנׇּכְרִיּ֑וֹת מַקְטִיר֥וֹת וּֽמְזַבְּח֖וֹת לֵאלֹהֵיהֶֽן׃ (ט) וַיִּתְאַנַּ֥ף יְהֹוָ֖ה בִּשְׁלֹמֹ֑ה כִּֽי־נָטָ֣ה לְבָב֗וֹ מֵעִ֤ם יְהֹוָה֙ אֱלֹהֵ֣י יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל הַנִּרְאָ֥ה אֵלָ֖יו פַּעֲמָֽיִם׃ (י) וְצִוָּ֤ה אֵלָיו֙ עַל־הַדָּבָ֣ר הַזֶּ֔ה לְבִ֨לְתִּי־לֶ֔כֶת אַחֲרֵ֖י אֱלֹהִ֣ים אֲחֵרִ֑ים וְלֹ֣א שָׁמַ֔ר אֵ֥ת אֲשֶׁר־צִוָּ֖ה יְהֹוָֽה׃ {פ}
(יא) וַיֹּ֨אמֶר יְהֹוָ֜ה לִשְׁלֹמֹ֗ה יַ֚עַן אֲשֶׁ֣ר הָֽיְתָה־זֹּ֣את עִמָּ֔ךְ וְלֹ֤א שָׁמַ֙רְתָּ֙ בְּרִיתִ֣י וְחֻקֹּתַ֔י אֲשֶׁ֥ר צִוִּ֖יתִי עָלֶ֑יךָ קָרֹ֨עַ אֶקְרַ֤ע אֶת־הַמַּמְלָכָה֙ מֵעָלֶ֔יךָ וּנְתַתִּ֖יהָ לְעַבְדֶּֽךָ׃
(1) King Solomon loved many foreign women in addition to Pharaoh’s daughter—Moabite, Ammonite, Edomite, Phoenician, and Hittite women, (2) from the nations of which GOD had said to the Israelites, “None of you shall join them and none of them shall join you,ajoin you In marriage; cf. Deut. 7.3–4; 23.4, 8–9. lest they turn your heart away to follow their gods.” Such Solomon clung to and loved. (3) He had seven hundred royal wives and three hundred concubines; and his wives turned his heart away. (4) In his old age, his wives turned away Solomon’s heart after other gods, and he was not as wholeheartedly devoted to the ETERNAL his God as his father David had been. (5) Solomon followed Ashtoreth the goddess of the Phoenicians, and Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. (6) Solomon did what was displeasing to GOD and did not remain loyal to GOD like his father David. (7) At that time, Solomon built a shrine for Chemosh the abomination of Moab on the hill near Jerusalem, and one for Molech the abomination of the Ammonites. (8) And he did the same for all his foreign wives who offered and sacrificed to their gods. (9) GOD was angry with Solomon, because his heart turned away from the ETERNAL, the God of Israel, who had appeared tobappeared to See note at 9.2. him twice (10) and had commanded him about this matter, not to follow other gods; he did not obey what GOD had commanded. (11) And GOD said to Solomon, “Because you are guilty of thiscBecause you are guilty of this Lit. “This is with you.”—you have not kept My covenant and the laws that I enjoined upon you—I will tear the kingdom away from you and give it to one of your servants.
(א) נשים נכריות רבות. שתים רעות עשה בזה אחת שהרבה נשים ואפילו היו מישראל אסור לו להרבות כמו שכתוב ולא ירבה לו נשים ולא יסור לבבו כל שכן שהיו נכריות שהטו לבבו אחרי אלהים אחרים והוא בטח בחכמתו ואמר אני ארבה ולא אסור זהו שאמר הנביא אל יתהלל חכם בחכמתו ומה שאמר ואת בת פרעה כי היא היתה תחילת הקלקלה אף על פי שהיא לא הטתה את לבבו עד שהרבה נשים נכריות לעת זקנתו והטו את לבבו ולא שעבד עבודת גילולים אלא שהניח נשיו לעבוד עבודת גילולים לאלהים אחרים אף שהניח אותן לבנות במות בירושלים לעבודת גילולים והוא שאמר אז יבנה שלמה שהניח לבנות ולא מיחה בהן:

You may be thinking- how is all this דיבור on עבודה זרה relevant to me in this modern day and age? If anything, it is more relevant than ever. עבודה זרה was expressed בימים ההם in devotions we would have to worldy things- בזמן הזה it is expressed in the very same way, albeit without stone statues of idols. See the article below for an elegant explanation:

Avodah Zara in Modern Times

I often recall the anecdote about the time I was teaching my Shabbos Gemara shiur, focusing on the tractate of avodah zara. I went to Tuvia’s seforim store in Monsey looking for an Artscroll copy of this volume. Yet, no matter how hard I looked I could not seem to find the volume I was looking for on the shelves. Finally, being exasperated, I went to Tuvia himself and exclaimed, “I am desperate. I am looking for an avodah zara.” He responded, “No problem… Come to my house. I have a 60 inch television mounted on my wall.”

As cute as the answer sounded then, I often wonder what was the attraction of avodah zara, idolatry. Was it all about worshiping statues? Do we still have any remnants of the desire to worship strange things, which is what the term, “avodah zara,” literally translates into?

It seems that many verses in the Torah are spent on the topic of avoiding avodah zara. We read the admonition not to forget that Hashem is the true God of the universe and that we dare not worship other entities (Devarim 8:19, 11:28.) In fact, the second of the 10 Commandments (Devarim 5:7-10) directly deals with avodah zara and the directive of not to engage in such worship.

The desire for avodah zara was virtually universal in ancient times. Societies all over the world had their peculiar religious beliefs, practices, priests and temples. Many temples, burial sites or great architecture marvels of the ancient world were devoted to these perceived spiritual needs. Even the most unnatural and unthinkable of practices — such as child sacrifice and self-flagellation — were rampant. The god of Ba’al Peor was actually the god of anything goes and was worshiped by defecating in front of the idol. The god, Merkules, was worshiped by throwing stones at the altar. Once the worshiper believed that anything goes, they were free to engage in licentious and immoral behavior with no restraints.

Looking back at history as described in the Tanach, we see that the attraction towards avodah zara was very strong. The kings of Israel were drawn towards the dark side and avodah zara was rampant. The northern kingdom of Israel was officially idolatrous, and in the South, idolatry was a constant enticement. Even some of the most righteous kings were not able to uproot the private altars which appear to have been present throughout the land. (Kings I 22:44 and Kings II 12:4.) The Gemara in Sanhedrin (63b) described the strange ways that idols were worshiped; some in what would otherwise be considered, disrespectful manners. We start to wonder to ourselves, “What were these people thinking?”

The Rambam (Moreh Nevuchim) explained that the average avodah zara worshiping person felt that Hashem was very busy. He did not get involved in the day to day operations of the universe. He, therefore, delegated the various powers associated with running the world to these avodah zaras. Therefore, the sun was to be worshiped for providing us with daylight and energy, etc. This followed the Roman model where Zeus delegated authority to the various sub-gods who were then to be invoked when personal requests were being made in their domain.

The Gemara (Sanhedrin 64a) related that the rabbis were finally able to tame the evil inclination towards idol worship. They tell the story of how this inclination manifested itself as a fiery lion cub that was captured and subdued by the sages of Israel. Today, we no longer have this desire. In fact, it can be difficult to imagine what it was once like.

However, we should not deceive ourselves into thinking that this desire has completely vanished. Perhaps, in modern times, it has taken another direction. Rabbi Eli Mansour points out that no one worships money as a divine being. Sadly, however, many people afford too much importance to it, seeing it as the ultimate value. There are some people who are preoccupied with money and the pursuit of wealth most of the time. They may sacrifice family time, time for Torah study or sacrifice their health in order to earn extra wealth and buy more and more luxuries. While our religion is not opposed to accumulating wealth, we are warned not to make anything other than God our highest priority; not to worship strange things. We need to keep money and wealth in its proper perspective, recognizing the other areas in our lives that are far more valuable and important. As the verse reminds us,“Man does not live by bread alone, but by that which emanates from the mouth of God, ” (Devarim 8:3).

Rabbi Nesanel Quinn, my former Menahel at Mesivta Torah Vodaas, used to quote the verse from Tehillim (Psalm 115) which describes, “their idols are silver and gold.” He told us not to necessarily read that the idols are made of silver and gold. Rather, there are people who worship actual silver and gold. Once they only value wealth to the exclusion of all else, they have a mouth but cannot speak. They have eyes that cannot see. They have ears but cannot hear. They become impervious to the needs of their friends and family.

Avodah zara — worshiping strange things — may also apply to those who are addicted to illicit substances, alcohol, sex or the internet. They may prioritize these addictions to the exclusion of family, friends or religion. Once a person forgets about the true God who rules the universe and gets caught up with the single minded pursuit of money or other addictions, things have a way of spiraling downwards, especially in his spiritual and physical life.

Although classic forms of idol worship may no longer exist, we need Hashem’s help and blessings so that we recognize our true priorities in life. We have to be careful not to pursue modern forms of avodah zara. While we need money to pay our bills, we need to especially value our spouses, our children, our well-being, our spiritual pursuits and the way in which we spend our time.