Embracing Atonement: The Inner Pathway to Forgiveness

דַּע, כִּי צָרִיךְ לָדוּן אֶת כָּל אָדָם לְכַף זְכוּת, וַאֲפִלּוּ מִי שֶׁהוּא רָשָׁע גָּמוּר, צָרִיךְ לְחַפֵּשׂ וְלִמְצֹא בּוֹ אֵיזֶה מְעַט טוֹב, שֶׁבְּאוֹתוֹ הַמְּעַט אֵינוֹ רָשָׁע...

וְכֵן צָרִיךְ הָאָדָם לִמְצֹא גַּם בְּעַצְמוֹ. כִּי זֶה יָדוּעַ, שֶׁצָּרִיךְ הָאָדָם לִזָּהֵר מְאֹד לִהְיוֹת בְּשִׂמְחָה תָּמִיד, וּלְהַרְחִיק הָעַצְבוּת מְאֹד מְאֹד...

כִּי צָרִיךְ הָאָדָם לְחַפֵּשׂ וּלְבַקֵּשׁ לִמְצֹא בְּעַצְמוֹ אֵיזֶה מְעַט טוֹב, כְּדֵי לְהַחֲיוֹת אֶת עַצְמוֹ, וְלָבוֹא לִידֵי שִׂמְחָה כַּנַּ"ל, וְעַל יְדֵי זֶה שֶׁמְּחַפֵּשׂ וּמוֹצֵא בְּעַצְמוֹ עֲדַיִן מְעַט טוֹב, עַל־יְדֵי־זֶה הוּא יוֹצֵא בֶּאֱמֶת מִכַּף חוֹבָה לְכַף זְכוּת, וְיוּכַל לָשׁוּב בִּתְשׁוּבָה...

כִּי זֶה יָדוּעַ שֶׁכְּשֶׁהָאָדָם נוֹפֵל בְּדַעְתּוֹ מֵחֲמַת גַּשְׁמִיּוּתוֹ וּמַעֲשָׂיו הָרָעִים, שֶׁרוֹאֶה שֶׁהוּא רָחוֹק מְאֹד מְאֹד מִן הַקְּדֻשָּׁה בֶּאֱמֶת, אֲזַי עַל־פִּי רֹב אֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לְהִתְפַּלֵּל כְּלָל מֵחֲמַת זֶה, וְאֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לִפְתֹּחַ פִּיו כְּלָל, מֵחֲמַת גֹּדֶל הָעַצְבוּת...עַל־יְדֵי שֶׁרוֹאֶה גֹּדֶל עֹצֶם רִחוּקוֹ מֵהַשֵּׁם יִתְבָּרַךְ.

Likutei Moharan 282:1:1

Know, a person must judge everyone favorably (Pirkei Avot 1:6). Even someone who is completely wicked, it is necessary to search and find in them some measure of good; that in that little bit they are not wicked...

Likewise, a person must find [some good point] within himself. It is known that a person must take care to be optimistic and not despair...

Therefore, a person has to search and seek to find in themself some little bit of good in order to revive himself and to attain joy, as explained above. By searching until he finds a remaining little bit of good in himself, he genuinely moves from the scale of guilt to the scale of merit and can return [to God] in repentance...

[However,] when a person obsesses over their [imperfections] and misdeeds, and one sees how very distant they truly are from holiness, one cannot pray. They cannot even open their mouth due to the utter despair [felt] from realizing just how distant one is from God.

Based on my research and the research of other shame researchers, I believe that there is a profound difference between shame and guilt. I believe that guilt is adaptive and helpful—it’s holding something we’ve done or failed to do up against our values and feeling psychological discomfort. I define shame as the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging—something we’ve experienced, done, or failed to do makes us unworthy of connection. I don’t believe shame is helpful or productive. In fact, I think shame is much more likely to be the source of destructive, hurtful behavior than the solution or cure. I think the fear of disconnection can make us dangerous.
—Brené Brown

ליקוטי תפילות, חלק א ט״ו:י״ט

וּבְכֵן תְּזַכֵּנִי בְּרַחֲמֶיךָ הָרַבִּים לִתְפִלָּה בֶּאֱמֶת בִּשְׁלֵמוּת כָּרָאוּי וְאֶזְכֶּה לְהִתְפַּלֵּל כָּל הַיּוֹם כֻּלּוֹ בֶּאֱמֶת, וּתְעוֹרֵר אֶת לְבָבִי בְּרַחֲמֶיךָ הָרַבִּים שֶׁאֶזְכֶּה לִשְׁפֹּךְ שִׂיחִי לְפָנֶיךָ, לְפָרֵשׁ שִׂיחָתִי לְפָנֶיךָ תָמִיד בִּתְפִלָּה וְתַחֲנוּנִים. וְאֵת כָּל הַטּוֹב אֲשֶׁר נִסְתָּר וְנִצְפָּן בִּנְקֻדָּתִי הַטּוֹבָה, אוּכַל לְהוֹצִיא לָאוֹר עַל־יְדֵי דִבּוּרֵי הַתְּפִלָּה וּתְחִנּוֹת וּבַקָּשׁוֹת בֶּאֱמֶת מֵעוּמְקָא דְלִבָּא, עַד שֶׁאֶזְכֶּה שֶׁיִּתְגַּלֶּה הַטּוֹב הַנֶּעְלָם וְהַנִּסְתָּר אֶצְלִי, וְיִתְגַּבֵּר הַטּוֹב עַל הָרָע, עַד שֶׁאַכְנִיעַ וַאֲבַטֵּל אֶת הָרַע לְגַמְרֵי, עַד שֶׁאֶזְכֶּה לָצֵאת מֵרַע לְטוֹב, מֵחֹשֶׁךְ לְאוֹר גָּדוֹל.

Likutei Tefilot, Volume I 15:19

Loving God, bring me to true prayer. Throughout the day let me always pray in the proper way, truthfully and sincerely. Arouse my feelings until I pour out my very heart to You in prayer and supplication. Help me bring all the goodness concealed within my inner good “point” out into the light. Let me draw the words of my prayers and supplications from the very depths of my heart, until the goodness concealed within me will be revealed and the good will outweigh the evil, enabling me to subdue my evil side and remove it completely. Bring me from evil to good, from darkness to great light.

“Tendril’ed Thoughts; Spiraling Worries Fish” (2014).
Hand-painted original art by J. VINCENT SCARPACE, Artist.