***Follow up from last time - Nekiyut/'cleaning up' - caring for ourselves - discoveries, challenges, questions...
For this week:
Humility - freedom from pride or arrogance
For this week:
Humility - freedom from pride or arrogance
(ג) וְהָאִ֥ישׁ מֹשֶׁ֖ה עָנָ֣ו מְאֹ֑ד מִכֹּל֙ הָֽאָדָ֔ם אֲשֶׁ֖ר עַל־פְּנֵ֥י הָאֲדָמָֽה׃ {ס}
(3) Now Moses himself was very humble, more so than any other human being on earth.
(א) ענו. שָׁפָל וְסַבְלָן:
(1) ענו means, humble and patient.
(א) ענו מאד. במשקל שלו והטעם שלא בקש גדולה על אחיו:
(1) WAS VERY MEEK. The word anav (meek) is similar to the word shalev (at peace) (Job 16:12). Its meaning is that Moses did not seek honor over his brother.
(א) וטעם והאיש משה ענו מאד להגיד כי השם קנא לו בעבור ענותנותו כי הוא לא יענה על ריב לעולם אף אם ידע ור"א מפרש ואמר כי הוא לא היה מבקש גדולה על שום אדם ולא יתגאה במעלתו כלל אף כי על אחיו והם חוטאים שמדברים עליו חנם אבל בספרי (בהעלתך ק) רבי נתן אומר אף בפניו של משה דברו בו שנאמר וישמע ה' והאיש משה עניו מאד אלא שכבש משה על הדבר יזכיר ענותנותו שסבל ולא ענם והשם קנא לו:
(1) NOW THE MAN MOSES WAS VERY MEEK. This [is stated] to tell us that G-d Himself was zealous for Moses’ sake on account of his [great] humility, since he would never pay attention to injustice [meted out to him] even if he were to consider it such [and therefore G-d vindicated his innocence]. [According to the Sifre, therefore, Scripture] mentions Moses’ meekness in that he endured [their insult] and did not answer them back, and that G-d was [therefore] zealous for his sake.
(ב) ענו כתיב חסר יו"ד לומר שהוא עניו בכל אבריו כי כשתכתוב אותיות של ענו בקריאתן עי"ן נו"ן וא"ו תמצא שהוא עולה רמ"ח אברים:
(2) ענו, the combined numerical value of the letters in this word is 248, a hint that there was not a bone in his body that was conceited. [We are supposed to have 248 limbs in our bodies. Ed.]
R. Mendel of Satanov:
- A person's love of themselves is the strongest of [things] a person loves that is imprinted by God on the animal soul and spreads out to one's body, offspring, possessions and anything else that belongs to them.
- A person is made to celebrate when others gaze at their good qualities - this is true glory
- Love of self is fundamental to the animal soul - it supports survival
- We like when others recognize the good in us - also related to fundamental needs - relationship, trust, safety
- But there are pitfalls here...the Yetzer Hara is strong
- From true pride/respect/honor/glory [one may choose to] pursue glory...to the point one will...invent all types of falsehoods to deceive people...a person may even develop a desire to chase after people who are [of] lesser [stature] in order to glorify in their advantages over them
- ...and a person may seek to broadcast even one's most minor qualities and [call attention to] the smallest of imperfections in others so that they will find a way to be prideful...
- R. Mendel warns us the need to compare ourselves to others will lead us to find many ways to do so
- A person will seek to make themselves feel good by making up stories to make themselves more grand than they are or making others less than
- This is the animal soul "staking out territory"
How do we prevent ourselves from this way of thinking and being?
- When we're in groups - avoid talking and listen instead
- Teach ourselves to listen and observe what others do so we can take lessons for the improvement of our middot
- Train ourselves to identify positive qualities, even small ones, in others
- Raise our self-awareness about our own qualities that need tikkun (repair) including pride (ga'a'vah)
Hishtavut - "equanimity", balance within ourselves - R. Alexander Ziskind Yesod ve'shoresh ha'Avodah - "The Foundation and Seed of Divine Service":
Hishtavut is the [way of being by which] we do not seek positive reinforcement (compliments) from others and we also do not allow ourselves to get upset when others say mean words to us.
Hishtavut is the [way of being by which] we do not seek positive reinforcement (compliments) from others and we also do not allow ourselves to get upset when others say mean words to us.
Thoughts on the Middah of Humility - Jessica Wadler:
The way I see humility is a spectrum of boastful pride at one end and on the other end, self depreciating. Not something anyone wants to be on either end of the spectrum, so finding the right place in between is the goal. I can actually now see that both ends of the spectrum are egotistical, because they’re very much focused on yourself versus the greater good or the intentions of God for you in the universe. I personally tend towards the lower end of the spectrum and that’s what I have worked on. I focused on moving to a more midline of humility where it’s not so self depreciating and more so what I will term “self actualizing”. What I mean by that is instead of thinking in terms of I’m doing things wrong or not enough or not well enough I’m reorienting my thoughts to recognize that what I AM doing serves the greater good and is divinely directed. And then to keep that level and balance when I do feel good about something, I try to put it in the context of accomplishing my goal of doing things for the greater good and see it as evidence of my contribution and affirming of my purpose. Attached is a quote that summarizes seeking humility well and the part underlined I think can be exchanged with other positive deeds or attributes to recognize your gift is God given. Keep inspired, purpose driven and grateful = balanced humility.
The way I see humility is a spectrum of boastful pride at one end and on the other end, self depreciating. Not something anyone wants to be on either end of the spectrum, so finding the right place in between is the goal. I can actually now see that both ends of the spectrum are egotistical, because they’re very much focused on yourself versus the greater good or the intentions of God for you in the universe. I personally tend towards the lower end of the spectrum and that’s what I have worked on. I focused on moving to a more midline of humility where it’s not so self depreciating and more so what I will term “self actualizing”. What I mean by that is instead of thinking in terms of I’m doing things wrong or not enough or not well enough I’m reorienting my thoughts to recognize that what I AM doing serves the greater good and is divinely directed. And then to keep that level and balance when I do feel good about something, I try to put it in the context of accomplishing my goal of doing things for the greater good and see it as evidence of my contribution and affirming of my purpose. Attached is a quote that summarizes seeking humility well and the part underlined I think can be exchanged with other positive deeds or attributes to recognize your gift is God given. Keep inspired, purpose driven and grateful = balanced humility.
- Small groups discussion: How can we be humble and also stand up for what we believe in? How do we cope in a society that often values comparison and superiority? How can we find thoughtful ways to approach others with a humble mindset?