The Gates of Teshuva Are Open
.ַהְשָּׁעִרים נְִפָתִּחים ְבָּכל ָשָׁעה וְָכל ִמי ֶשׁהוּא ְמבקּשׁ ִלכּנֵס יִכּנֵס...
Shemot Rabbah 19:4
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...The gates of teshuva are always open, and anyone who wishes to enter may enter... |
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...נִמְשְׁלָה תְּפִלָּה כְּמִקְוָה וְנִמְשְׁלָה תְּשׁוּבָה כַּיָּם. מַה מִּקְוָה זוֹ פְּעָמִים פְּתוּחָה פְּעָמִים נְעוּלָה, כָּךְ שַׁעֲרֵי תְּפִלָּה פְּעָמִים נְעוּלִים פְּעָמִים פְּתוּחִין, אֲבָל הַיָּם הַזֶּה לְעוֹלָם פָּתוּחַ, כָּךְ שַׁעֲרֵי תְּשׁוּבָה לְעוֹלָם פְּתוּחִין...
Eicha Rabbah 3:15
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......Prayer is likened to an immersion pool, but repentance is likened to the sea. Just as an immersion pool is at times open and at other times locked, so the gates of prayer are at times open and at other times locked. But the sea is always open, even as the gates of repentance are always open... |
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What images, associations or feelings do these texts evoke? What is your reaction to prayer as an immersion pool and teshuva as the sea?
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What does it mean to imagine that the gates of teshuva are always open? How might this affect how we live? Are there ever times when it has felt to you like the gates of teshuva are closed?
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Taking the metaphor and applying it internally, are there parts of yourself that feel like an immersion pool - sometimes locked? Are there places that feel like the sea - always open? How do you navigate this?
He will cover up our iniquities,
You will hurl all our sins
Into the depths of the sea.
as befits Your faithfulness;
in keeping with Your abundant compassion,
blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly of my iniquity,
and purify me of my sin;
(א) בְּרֵאשִׁ֖ית בָּרָ֣א אֱלֹהִ֑ים אֵ֥ת הַשָּׁמַ֖יִם וְאֵ֥ת הָאָֽרֶץ׃ (ב) וְהָאָ֗רֶץ הָיְתָ֥ה תֹ֙הוּ֙ וָבֹ֔הוּ וְחֹ֖שֶׁךְ עַל־פְּנֵ֣י תְה֑וֹם וְר֣וּחַ אֱלֹהִ֔ים מְרַחֶ֖פֶת עַל־פְּנֵ֥י הַמָּֽיִם׃ (ג) וַיֹּ֥אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֖ים יְהִ֣י א֑וֹר וַֽיְהִי־אֽוֹר׃ (ד) וַיַּ֧רְא אֱלֹהִ֛ים אֶת־הָא֖וֹר כִּי־ט֑וֹב וַיַּבְדֵּ֣ל אֱלֹהִ֔ים בֵּ֥ין הָא֖וֹר וּבֵ֥ין הַחֹֽשֶׁךְ׃ (ה) וַיִּקְרָ֨א אֱלֹהִ֤ים ׀ לָאוֹר֙ י֔וֹם וְלַחֹ֖שֶׁךְ קָ֣רָא לָ֑יְלָה וַֽיְהִי־עֶ֥רֶב וַֽיְהִי־בֹ֖קֶר י֥וֹם אֶחָֽד׃ {פ}
(ו) וַיֹּ֣אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֔ים יְהִ֥י רָקִ֖יעַ בְּת֣וֹךְ הַמָּ֑יִם וִיהִ֣י מַבְדִּ֔יל בֵּ֥ין מַ֖יִם לָמָֽיִם׃ (ז) וַיַּ֣עַשׂ אֱלֹהִים֮ אֶת־הָרָקִ֒יעַ֒ וַיַּבְדֵּ֗ל בֵּ֤ין הַמַּ֙יִם֙ אֲשֶׁר֙ מִתַּ֣חַת לָרָקִ֔יעַ וּבֵ֣ין הַמַּ֔יִם אֲשֶׁ֖ר מֵעַ֣ל לָרָקִ֑יעַ וַֽיְהִי־כֵֽן׃ (ח) וַיִּקְרָ֧א אֱלֹהִ֛ים לָֽרָקִ֖יעַ שָׁמָ֑יִם וַֽיְהִי־עֶ֥רֶב וַֽיְהִי־בֹ֖קֶר י֥וֹם שֵׁנִֽי׃ {פ}
(ט) וַיֹּ֣אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֗ים יִקָּו֨וּ הַמַּ֜יִם מִתַּ֤חַת הַשָּׁמַ֙יִם֙ אֶל־מָק֣וֹם אֶחָ֔ד וְתֵרָאֶ֖ה הַיַּבָּשָׁ֑ה וַֽיְהִי־כֵֽן׃ (י) וַיִּקְרָ֨א אֱלֹהִ֤ים ׀ לַיַּבָּשָׁה֙ אֶ֔רֶץ וּלְמִקְוֵ֥ה הַמַּ֖יִם קָרָ֣א יַמִּ֑ים וַיַּ֥רְא אֱלֹהִ֖ים כִּי־טֽוֹב׃
(1) When God began to create heaven and earth— (2) the earth being unformed and void, with darkness over the surface of the deep and a wind from God sweeping over the water— (3) God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light. (4) God saw that the light was good, and God separated the light from the darkness. (5) God called the light Day and called the darkness Night. And there was evening and there was morning, a first day. (6) God said, “Let there be an expanse in the midst of the water, that it may separate water from water.” (7) God made the expanse, and it separated the water which was below the expanse from the water which was above the expanse. And it was so. (8) God called the expanse Sky. And there was evening and there was morning, a second day. (9) God said, “Let the water below the sky be gathered into one area, that the dry land may appear.” And it was so. (10) God called the dry land Earth and called the gathering of waters Seas. And God saw that this was good.
THE GATHERING OF THE WATERS
ON the third day all the earth was flat like a plain and the waters covered the surface of all the earth. When the word of the Almighty was uttered, "Let the waters be gathered together" (Gen. 1:9), the mountains and hills arose from the ends of the earth and they were scattered over the surface of all the earth, and valleys were formed over the inner parts of the earth; and the waters were rolled together and gathered into the valleys, as it is said, "And the gathering together of the waters he called seas" (Gen. 1:10). Forthwith the waters became proud and they arose to cover the earth as at first, when the Holy One, blessed be He, rebuked them || and subdued them, and placed them beneath the soles of His feet, and measured them with the hollow of His hand that they should neither decrease nor increase. He made the sand as the boundary of the sea, just like a man who makes a fence for his vineyard. When they rise and see the sand before them they return to their former place, as it is said, "Fear ye not me? saith the Lord: will ye not tremble at my presence, which have placed the sand for the bound of the sea?" (Jer. 5:22).
הוֹשִׁיב בָּהּ הַמֶּלֶךְ דָּיוֹרִין פִּקְחִין, עָמְדוּ וְהֶחֱזִיקוּ בַּפָּלָטִין, אָמְרוּ אֵין פָּלָטִין זוֹ שֶׁל מֶלֶךְ, שֶׁלָּנוּ הִיא, אָמַר הַמֶּלֶךְ תַּחְזֹר פָּלָטִין לִכְמוֹ שֶׁהָיְתָה.
אָמַר רַבִּי חֲנִינָא: הָרוֹאֶה בְּאֵר בַּחֲלוֹם — רוֹאֶה שָׁלוֹם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״וַיַּחְפְּרוּ עַבְדֵי יִצְחָק בַּנָּחַל וַיִּמְצְאוּ שָׁם בְּאֵר מַיִם חַיִּים״. רַבִּי נָתָן אוֹמֵר: מָצָא תּוֹרָה — שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״כִּי מֹצְאִי מָצָא חַיִּים״, וּכְתִיב הָכָא: ״בְּאֵר מַיִם חַיִּים״. רָבָא אָמַר: חַיִּים מַמָּשׁ.
Your story is not just a shallow pool collecting a little rain here and there from what maybe-could’ve-should’ve been.
Your story is a sea, weighted with mystery, and wave after wave it reveals more and more, no matter the opportunities you missed or left behind on the shore.
Your story has every ounce of water it needs.
It is not missing any long-gone thing.
All by grace, it is still being written, in the way it was meant to be.
Nichols, Morgan Harper. All Along You Were Blooming (p. 15). Zondervan.
Forgiving iniquity
And remitting transgression;
Who has not maintained His wrath forever
Against the remnant of His own people,
Because He loves graciousness! (19) He will take us back in love;
He will cover up our iniquities,
You will hurl all our sins
Into the depths of the sea.
Questions and Texts for Havruta
- What role does the water play in immersion?
- How is water God-like?
- What makes immersion a spiritual experience?
- Why do you think the Hafetz Hayyim says we should build a mikveh first, even before building a synagogue or purchasing a Torah scroll?
- What about what you learned today speaks to you? (This will help you start preparing your ceremony, thinking about what about this ritual speaks to your heart, as you can incorporate into the ceremony some of the things you relate to about mikveh, especially in relation to your kavannot.)
Mircea Eliade, 20th-century Romanian philosopher, writer and professor at University of Chicago
“In water everything is dissolved, every form is broken up, everything that has happened ceases to exist. Nothing that was before remains after immersion in water, not an outline, not a sign, not an event. Immersion is the equivalent, at the human level, of death at the cosmic level, of the cataclysm (the Flood) which, periodically dissolves the worlds into the primeval ocean. Breaking up all forms, doing away with the past, water possesses the power of purifying, of regenerating, of giving new birth... Water purifies and regenerates because it nullifies the past, and restores—even if only for a moment—the integrity of the dawn of things.”
The Color of Water, James McBride-
“What color is God’s spirit?” “It doesn’t have a color,” she said. “God is the color of water.”
(טז) מְשִֽׁיחַ צִדְקֶֽךָ אָמַר לְפָנֶֽיךָ שְׁגִיאוֹת מִי יָבִין מִנִּסְתָּרוֹת נַקֵּֽנִי. נַקֵּֽנוּ יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהֵֽינוּ מִכָּל פְּשָׁעֵֽינוּ וְטַהֲרֵֽנוּ מִכָּל טֻּמְאוֹתֵֽינוּ וּזְרוֹק עָלֵֽינוּ מַֽיִם טְהוֹרִים וְטַהֲרֵֽנוּ. כַּכָּתוּב עַל יַד נְבִיאֶֽךָ וְזָרַֽקְתִּי עֲלֵיכֶם מַֽיִם טְהוֹרִים וּטְהַרְתֶּם מִכֹּל טֻמְאוֹתֵיכֶם וּמִכָּל גִּלּוּלֵיכֶם אֲטַהֵר אֶתְכֶם:
(16) Your righteous annointed [King David] declared before You, Errors—who can comprehend? From hidden [faults], cleanse me.” Cleanse us, Adonoy, our God, from all our transgressions, and purify us from all our defilement. Sprinkle clean waters on us and cleanse us, as it is written by the hand of Your prophet, “And I will sprinkle clean water upon you, and you will be clean; from all your defilements, and from all your idols, I will cleanse You.”
(יז) מִיכָה עַבְדְּךָ אָמַר לְפָנֶֽיךָ. מִי אֵל כָּמֽוֹךָ נוֹשֵׂא עָוֹן וְעוֹבֵר עַל פֶּֽשַׁע לִשְׁאֵרִית נַחֲלָתוֹ לֹא הֶחֱזִיק לָעַד אַפּוֹ כִּי חָפֵץ חֶֽסֶד הוּא: יָשׁוּב יְרַחֲמֵֽנוּ יִכְבּוֹשׁ עֲוֹנוֹתֵֽינוּ. וְתַשְׁלִיךְ בִּמְצֻלוֹת יָם כָּל חַטֹּאתָם: וְכָל־חַטֹּאת עַמְּךָ בֵּית יִשְׂרָאֵל תַּשְׁלִיךְ בִּמְקוֹם אֲשֶׁר לֹא יִזָּכְרוּ וְלֹא יִפָּקְדוּ וְלֹא יַעֲלוּ עַל לֵב לְעוֹלָם תִּתֵּן אֱמֶת לְיַעֲקֹב חֶֽסֶד לְאַבְרָהָם אשֶׁר נִשְׁבַּֽעְתָּ לַאֲבוֹתֵֽינוּ מִימֵי קֶֽדֶם:
(17) Micah, Your servant, said before You, “Who is an Almighty [God] like You? Who bears iniquity and overlooks transgression of the remnant of His inheritance; Who does not retain His anger forever, for He delights in kindliness. He will again have compassion on us, He will subdue our inquities, and cast into the depths of the sea, all their sins. And all the sins of Your people the House of Israel, You will cast into a place where they will never be remembered or counted and never recalled to mind. You will grant truth to Jacob, kindliness to Abraham, as You have sworn to our fathers from the days of old.”
(א) אֵל רַחוּם שְׁמֶֽךָ. (...) עֲשֵׂה לְמַֽעַן בָּאֵי בָאֵשׁ וּבַמַּֽיִם עַל קִדּוּשׁ שְׁמֶֽךָ. (...) עֲשֵׂה לְמַעַנְךָ אִם לֹא לְמַעֲנֵֽנוּ. עֲשֵׂה לְמַעַנְךָ וְהוֹשִׁיעֵֽנוּ:
(1) Merciful Almighty is Your Name, (...). Act for the sake of those who went through fire and water to sanctify Your Name.(...). Act for Your sake and not ours. Act for Your sake and deliver us.
מִי שֶׁעָנָה לַאֲבוֹתֵֽינוּ עַל יַם סוּף הוּא יַעֲנֵֽנוּ: ... מִי שֶׁעָנָה לְיוֹנָה בִמְעֵי הַדָּגָה הוּא יַעֲנֵֽנוּ:...
(3) ...He Who answered our ancestors at the Reed Sea, He will answer us. ... He Who answered Jonah in the belly of the whale, He will answer us...
(ג) שְׁמַע קוֹלֵֽנוּ יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהֵֽינוּ חוּס וְרַחֵם עָלֵֽינוּ וְקַבֵּל בְּרַחֲמִים וּבְרָצוֹן אֶת תְּפִלָּתֵֽנוּ: הֲשִׁיבֵֽנוּ יְהֹוָה אֵלֶֽיךָ וְנָשֽׁוּבָה חַדֵּשׁ יָמֵֽינוּ כְּקֶֽדֶם: אַל תַּשְׁלִיכֵֽנוּ מִלְּפָנֶֽיךָ וְרֽוּחַ קָדְשְׁךָ אַל תִּקַּח מִמֶּֽנּוּ: אַל תַּשְׁלִיכֵֽנוּ לְעֵת זִקְנָה כִּכְלוֹת כֹּחֵֽנוּ אַל תַּעַזְבֵֽנוּ:
(3) Hear our voice, Adonoy, our God; spare us and have compassion on us, and accept our prayers mercifully and willingly. Lead us back to You, Adonoy and we shall find the way back; renew our days as of old. Cast us not away from Your Presence, and Your holy spirit take not from us. Do not cast us off in time of old age, when our strength fails, do not forsake us.
באחד בשבת נכנס אדם במי גיחון העליון עד שהגיעו מים עד צוארו ונתענה שבעה שבתות ימי' עד שנעשה גופו כמן כברה. אמר אדם לפני הקב"ה רבון כל העולמים העבר נא חטאתי מעלי וקבל את תשובתי וילמדו כל הדורות שיש תשובה ואתה מקבל תשובת השבים. מה עשה הקב"ה פשט יד ימינו והעביר את חטאתו מעליו וקבל את תשובתו...
On the first day of the week he went into the waters of the upper Gihon until the waters reached up to his neck, and he fasted seven weeks of days, until his body became like a species of seaweed. Adam said before the Holy One, blessed be He: Sovereign of all worlds ! Remove, I pray Thee, my sins from me and accept my repentance, and all the generations will learn that repentance is a reality. What did the Holy One, blessed be He, do? He put forth His right hand, and accepted his repentance...
... "ורוח אלקים מרחפת" (שם), זה רוחו של מלך המשיח, היאך מה דאת אמר (ישעיה יא, ב) "ונחה עליו רוח ה'". באיזו זכות ממשמשת ובאה, "מרחפת על פני המים" (בראשית שם), בזכות התשובה שנמשלה כמים, שנאמר (איכה ב, יט) "שפכי כמים לבך"...
..."and a wind from God sweeping" - this is the wind of the King the Messiah, as it's written (Isiaih: 11,2) "The spirit [same root as 'wind'] of the Hashem". Through what merit will [Moshiach] be summoned and come? "sweeping over the waters" - in the merit of Teshuva, which is likened to water, as it says (Lamentations: 2,19) "Pour out your heart like water".(B'R: 2,4)...
And let us come back;
Renew our days as of old!