(טו) וּפָקַדְתִּ֣י עָלֶ֗יהָ אֶת־יְמֵ֤י הַבְּעָלִים֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר תַּקְטִ֣יר לָהֶ֔ם וַתַּ֤עַד נִזְמָהּ֙ וְחֶלְיָתָ֔הּ וַתֵּ֖לֶךְ אַחֲרֵ֣י מְאַהֲבֶ֑יהָ וְאֹתִ֥י שָׁכְחָ֖ה נְאֻם־יְהֹוָֽה׃ {ס} (טז) לָכֵ֗ן הִנֵּ֤ה אָנֹכִי֙ מְפַתֶּ֔יהָ וְהֹלַכְתִּ֖יהָ הַמִּדְבָּ֑ר וְדִבַּרְתִּ֖י עַל־לִבָּֽהּ׃ (יז) וְנָתַ֨תִּי לָ֤הּ אֶת־כְּרָמֶ֙יהָ֙ מִשָּׁ֔ם וְאֶת־עֵ֥מֶק עָכ֖וֹר לְפֶ֣תַח תִּקְוָ֑ה וְעָ֤נְתָה שָּׁ֙מָּה֙ כִּימֵ֣י נְעוּרֶ֔יהָ וּכְי֖וֹם עֲלוֹתָ֥הּ מֵאֶרֶץ־מִצְרָֽיִם׃ (יח) וְהָיָ֤ה בַיּוֹם־הַהוּא֙ נְאֻם־יְהֹוָ֔ה תִּקְרְאִ֖י אִישִׁ֑י וְלֹא־תִקְרְאִי־לִ֥י ע֖וֹד בַּעְלִֽי׃
(15) Thus will I punish her
For the days of the Baalim,
On which she brought them offerings;
When, decked with earrings and jewels,
She would go after her lovers,
Forgetting Me
—declares the LORD.
(16) Assuredly,
I will speak coaxingly to her
And lead her through the wilderness
And speak to her tenderly. (17) I will give her her vineyards from there,
And the Valley of Achor as a plowland of hope.-i
There she shall respond as in the days of her youth,
When she came up from the land of Egypt. (18) And in that day
—declares the LORD—
You will call [Me] Ishi,
And no more will you call Me Baali.
For the days of the Baalim,
On which she brought them offerings;
When, decked with earrings and jewels,
She would go after her lovers,
Forgetting Me
—declares the LORD.
(16) Assuredly,
I will speak coaxingly to her
And lead her through the wilderness
And speak to her tenderly. (17) I will give her her vineyards from there,
And the Valley of Achor as a plowland of hope.-i
There she shall respond as in the days of her youth,
When she came up from the land of Egypt. (18) And in that day
—declares the LORD—
You will call [Me] Ishi,
And no more will you call Me Baali.
From Dr. Rachel Adler's "Brit Ahuvim: A Marriage between Subjects", p. 169, in her book "Engendering Judaism":
"These [the matrimonial anguishes in the book of Hosea] unresolved tensions between woman as possession and woman as partner are embedded int eh classical liturgy upon which all modern Jewish wedding ceremonies draw"
"These [the matrimonial anguishes in the book of Hosea] unresolved tensions between woman as possession and woman as partner are embedded int eh classical liturgy upon which all modern Jewish wedding ceremonies draw"
(ג) וַיָּבֹ֧א אֱלֹהִ֛ים אֶל־אֲבִימֶ֖לֶךְ בַּחֲל֣וֹם הַלָּ֑יְלָה וַיֹּ֣אמֶר ל֗וֹ הִנְּךָ֥ מֵת֙ עַל־הָאִשָּׁ֣ה אֲשֶׁר־לָקַ֔חְתָּ וְהִ֖וא בְּעֻ֥לַת בָּֽעַל׃
(3) But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night and said to him, “You are to die because of the woman that you have taken, for she is a married woman.”
Notice the words "B'ulat Ba'al" - Ba'al literally means owner.
below are additional examples of the word ba'al:
(ב) וְזֶה֮ דְּבַ֣ר הַשְּׁמִטָּה֒ שָׁמ֗וֹט כׇּל־בַּ֙עַל֙ מַשֵּׁ֣ה יָד֔וֹ אֲשֶׁ֥ר יַשֶּׁ֖ה בְּרֵעֵ֑הוּ לֹֽא־יִגֹּ֤שׂ אֶת־רֵעֵ֙הוּ֙ וְאֶת־אָחִ֔יו כִּֽי־קָרָ֥א שְׁמִטָּ֖ה לַיהֹוָֽה׃
(2) This shall be the nature of the remission: all creditors shall remit the due that they claim from their fellow [Israelites]; they shall not dun their fellow [Israelites] or kin, for the remission proclaimed is of יהוה.
(ז) אִם־לֹ֤א יִמָּצֵא֙ הַגַּנָּ֔ב וְנִקְרַ֥ב בַּֽעַל־הַבַּ֖יִת אֶל־הָֽאֱלֹהִ֑ים אִם־לֹ֥א שָׁלַ֛ח יָד֖וֹ בִּמְלֶ֥אכֶת רֵעֵֽהוּ׃
(7) if the thief is not caught, the owner of the house shall depose before God and deny laying hands on the other’s property.
(כה) וְאֶלְעָזָ֨ר בֶּֽן־אַהֲרֹ֜ן לָקַֽח־ל֨וֹ מִבְּנ֤וֹת פּֽוּטִיאֵל֙ ל֣וֹ לְאִשָּׁ֔ה וַתֵּ֥לֶד ל֖וֹ אֶת־פִּֽינְחָ֑ס אֵ֗לֶּה רָאשֵׁ֛י אֲב֥וֹת הַלְוִיִּ֖ם לְמִשְׁפְּחֹתָֽם׃
(25) And Aaron’s son Eleazar took into his [household] as wife one of Putiel’s daughters, and she bore him Phinehas. Those are the heads of the ancestral houses of the Levites by their families.
"Lakach" is "took" - the old word for marriage. A man takes a woman - not the other way around.
the same word for "taking" is used for acquiring property:
(יג) וַיְדַבֵּ֨ר אֶל־עֶפְר֜וֹן בְּאׇזְנֵ֤י עַם־הָאָ֙רֶץ֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר אַ֛ךְ אִם־אַתָּ֥ה ל֖וּ שְׁמָעֵ֑נִי נָתַ֜תִּי כֶּ֤סֶף הַשָּׂדֶה֙ קַ֣ח מִמֶּ֔נִּי וְאֶקְבְּרָ֥ה אֶת־מֵתִ֖י שָֽׁמָּה׃
(13) and spoke to Ephron in the hearing of the landowning citizens, saying, “If only you would hear me out! Let me pay the price of the land; accept it from me, that I may bury my dead there.”
(יג) כִּֽי־יִקַּ֥ח אִ֖ישׁ אִשָּׁ֑ה וּבָ֥א אֵלֶ֖יהָ וּשְׂנֵאָֽהּ׃ (יד) וְשָׂ֥ם לָהּ֙ עֲלִילֹ֣ת דְּבָרִ֔ים וְהוֹצִ֥א עָלֶ֖יהָ שֵׁ֣ם רָ֑ע וְאָמַ֗ר אֶת־הָאִשָּׁ֤ה הַזֹּאת֙ לָקַ֔חְתִּי וָאֶקְרַ֣ב אֵלֶ֔יהָ וְלֹא־מָצָ֥אתִי לָ֖הּ בְּתוּלִֽים׃ (טו) וְלָקַ֛ח אֲבִ֥י הַֽנַּעֲרָ֖ וְאִמָּ֑הּ וְהוֹצִ֜יאוּ אֶת־בְּתוּלֵ֧י הַֽנַּעֲרָ֛ אֶל־זִקְנֵ֥י הָעִ֖יר הַשָּֽׁעְרָה׃ (טז) וְאָמַ֛ר אֲבִ֥י הַֽנַּעֲרָ֖ אֶל־הַזְּקֵנִ֑ים אֶת־בִּתִּ֗י נָתַ֜תִּי לָאִ֥ישׁ הַזֶּ֛ה לְאִשָּׁ֖ה וַיִּשְׂנָאֶֽהָ׃ (יז) וְהִנֵּה־ה֡וּא שָׂם֩ עֲלִילֹ֨ת דְּבָרִ֜ים לֵאמֹ֗ר לֹֽא־מָצָ֤אתִי לְבִתְּךָ֙ בְּתוּלִ֔ים וְאֵ֖לֶּה בְּתוּלֵ֣י בִתִּ֑י וּפָֽרְשׂוּ֙ הַשִּׂמְלָ֔ה לִפְנֵ֖י זִקְנֵ֥י הָעִֽיר׃ (יח) וְלָ֥קְח֛וּ זִקְנֵ֥י הָֽעִיר־הַהִ֖וא אֶת־הָאִ֑ישׁ וְיִסְּר֖וּ אֹתֽוֹ׃ (יט) וְעָנְשׁ֨וּ אֹת֜וֹ מֵ֣אָה כֶ֗סֶף וְנָתְנוּ֙ לַאֲבִ֣י הַֽנַּעֲרָ֔ה כִּ֤י הוֹצִיא֙ שֵׁ֣ם רָ֔ע עַ֖ל בְּתוּלַ֣ת יִשְׂרָאֵ֑ל וְלֽוֹ־תִהְיֶ֣ה לְאִשָּׁ֔ה לֹא־יוּכַ֥ל לְשַׁלְּחָ֖הּ כׇּל־יָמָֽיו׃ {ס} (כ) וְאִם־אֱמֶ֣ת הָיָ֔ה הַדָּבָ֖ר הַזֶּ֑ה לֹא־נִמְצְא֥וּ בְתוּלִ֖ים לַֽנַּעֲרָֽ׃ (כא) וְהוֹצִ֨יאוּ אֶת־הַֽנַּעֲרָ֜ אֶל־פֶּ֣תַח בֵּית־אָבִ֗יהָ וּסְקָל֩וּהָ֩ אַנְשֵׁ֨י עִירָ֤הּ בָּאֲבָנִים֙ וָמֵ֔תָה כִּֽי־עָשְׂתָ֤ה נְבָלָה֙ בְּיִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל לִזְנ֖וֹת בֵּ֣ית אָבִ֑יהָ וּבִֽעַרְתָּ֥ הָרָ֖ע מִקִּרְבֶּֽךָ׃ {ס} (כב) כִּֽי־יִמָּצֵ֨א אִ֜ישׁ שֹׁכֵ֣ב ׀ עִם־אִשָּׁ֣ה בְעֻֽלַת־בַּ֗עַל וּמֵ֙תוּ֙ גַּם־שְׁנֵיהֶ֔ם הָאִ֛ישׁ הַשֹּׁכֵ֥ב עִם־הָאִשָּׁ֖ה וְהָאִשָּׁ֑ה וּבִֽעַרְתָּ֥ הָרָ֖ע מִיִּשְׂרָאֵֽל׃ {ס}
(13) A householder takes a woman [as his wife] and cohabits with her. Then he takes an aversion to her (14) and makes up charges against her and defames her, saying, “This is the party I took [to wife]; but when I approached her, I found that she was not a virgin.” (15) In such a case, the girl’s father and mother shall produce the evidence of the girl’s virginity before the elders of the town at the gate. (16) And the girl’s father shall say to the elders, “To this party I gave my own daughter to wife, but he has taken an aversion to her; (17) so he has made up charges, saying, ‘I did not find your daughter a virgin.’ But here is the evidence of my daughter’s virginity!” And they shall spread out the cloth before the elders of the town. (18) The elders of that town shall then take that party and flog him, (19) and they shall fine him a hundred [shekels of] silver and give it to the girl’s father; for [that householder] has defamed a virgin in Israel. Moreover, she shall remain his wife; he shall never have the right to divorce her. (20) But if the charge proves true, the girl was found not to have been a virgin, (21) then the girl shall be brought out to the entrance of her father’s house, and her town’s council shall stone her to death; for she did a shameful thing in Israel, committing fornication while under her father’s authority. Thus you will sweep away evil from your midst. (22) If a man is found lying with another man’s wife, both of them—the man and the woman with whom he lay—shall die. Thus you will sweep away evil from Israel.
"At the same time, marital ownership in the Bible transcends the purely commercial. Adultery, like idolatry, incest, and murder, pollutes the land itself....." (From Rachel Adler, ibid p. 171]
(כד) אַל־תִּֽטַּמְּא֖וּ בְּכׇל־אֵ֑לֶּה כִּ֤י בְכׇל־אֵ֙לֶּה֙ נִטְמְא֣וּ הַגּוֹיִ֔ם אֲשֶׁר־אֲנִ֥י מְשַׁלֵּ֖חַ מִפְּנֵיכֶֽם׃ (כה) וַתִּטְמָ֣א הָאָ֔רֶץ וָאֶפְקֹ֥ד עֲוֺנָ֖הּ עָלֶ֑יהָ וַתָּקִ֥א הָאָ֖רֶץ אֶת־יֹשְׁבֶֽיהָ׃ (כו) וּשְׁמַרְתֶּ֣ם אַתֶּ֗ם אֶת־חֻקֹּתַי֙ וְאֶת־מִשְׁפָּטַ֔י וְלֹ֣א תַעֲשׂ֔וּ מִכֹּ֥ל הַתּוֹעֵבֹ֖ת הָאֵ֑לֶּה הָֽאֶזְרָ֔ח וְהַגֵּ֖ר הַגָּ֥ר בְּתוֹכְכֶֽם׃ (כז) כִּ֚י אֶת־כׇּל־הַתּוֹעֵבֹ֣ת הָאֵ֔ל עָשׂ֥וּ אַנְשֵֽׁי־הָאָ֖רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֣ר לִפְנֵיכֶ֑ם וַתִּטְמָ֖א הָאָֽרֶץ׃ (כח) וְלֹֽא־תָקִ֤יא הָאָ֙רֶץ֙ אֶתְכֶ֔ם בְּטַֽמַּאֲכֶ֖ם אֹתָ֑הּ כַּאֲשֶׁ֥ר קָאָ֛ה אֶת־הַגּ֖וֹי אֲשֶׁ֥ר לִפְנֵיכֶֽם׃
(24) Do not defile yourselves in any of those ways, for it is by such that the nations that I am casting out before you defiled themselves. (25) Thus the land became defiled; and I called it to account for its iniquity, and the land spewed out its inhabitants. (26) But you must keep My laws and My rules, and you must not do any of those abhorrent things, neither the citizen nor the stranger who resides among you; (27) for all those abhorrent things were done by the people who were in the land before you, and the land became defiled. (28) So let not the land spew you out for defiling it, as it spewed out the nation that came before you.
(א) הָאִשָּׁה נִקְנֵית בְּשָׁלשׁ דְּרָכִים, וְקוֹנָה אֶת עַצְמָהּ בִּשְׁתֵּי דְרָכִים. נִקְנֵית בְּכֶסֶף, בִּשְׁטָר, וּבְבִיאָה. בְּכֶסֶף, בֵּית שַׁמַּאי אוֹמְרִים, בְּדִינָר וּבְשָׁוֶה דִינָר. וּבֵית הִלֵּל אוֹמְרִים, בִּפְרוּטָה וּבְשָׁוֶה פְרוּטָה. וְכַמָּה הִיא פְרוּטָה, אֶחָד מִשְּׁמֹנָה בָאִסָּר הָאִיטַלְקִי. וְקוֹנָה אֶת עַצְמָהּ בְּגֵט וּבְמִיתַת הַבָּעַל. הַיְבָמָה נִקְנֵית בְּבִיאָה. וְקוֹנָה אֶת עַצְמָהּ בַּחֲלִיצָה וּבְמִיתַת הַיָּבָם:
(1) A woman is acquired by, i.e., becomes betrothed to, a man to be his wife in three ways, and she acquires herself, i.e., she terminates her marriage, in two ways. The mishna elaborates: She is acquired through money, through a document, and through sexual intercourse. With regard to a betrothal through money, there is a dispute between tanna’im: Beit Shammai say that she can be acquired with one dinar or with anything that is worth one dinar. And Beit Hillel say: She can be acquired with one peruta, a small copper coin, or with anything that is worth one peruta. The mishna further clarifies: And how much is the value of one peruta, by the fixed value of silver? The mishna explains that it is one-eighth of the Italian issar, which is a small silver coin. And a woman acquires herself through a bill of divorce or through the death of the husband. A woman whose husband, who had a brother, died childless [yevama], can be acquired by the deceased husband’s brother, the yavam, only through intercourse. And she acquires herself, i.e., she is released from her levirate bond, through ḥalitza or through the death of the yavam.
In what way is the acquisition of a woman different from acquiring a loaf of bread?
דאסר לה אכולי עלמא כהקדש - והרי את מקודשת לי, כלומר להיות לי מקודשת לעולם בשבילי כמו (נדרים מח.) "הרי הן מקודשין לשמיים" להיות לשמיים. ופשטא דמילתא: מקודשת לי, מיוחדת לי, ומזומנת לי. ומיהו: אם היה אומר "טלית זו מקודש לי" אין נראה שיועיל, דגבי אשה במה דמתיחדת להיות לו היא נאסרת לכל, אבל בככר וטלית לא שייך למימר הכי.
"The it forbids her to everyone like hekdesh". And [the pronouncement] "Behold you are betrothed (מקודשת) to me means "That you should be to me sanctified forever for me", like (Nedarim 48a) "Behold these are sanctified for heaven", that they should be heaven's. And the literal meaning of the word is "You are sanctified to me" = "Special to me", "Designated for me." But if he said "This cloak is sanctified to me" it doesn't appear that this is effective, since regarding a wife that is special to be his she is forbidden to everyone else, but with a loaf of bread or a cloak it is not fitting to say this.
תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן כֵּיצַד בְּכֶסֶף נָתַן לָהּ כֶּסֶף אוֹ שָׁוֶה כֶּסֶף וְאָמַר לָהּ הֲרֵי אַתְּ מְקוּדֶּשֶׁת לִי הֲרֵי אַתְּ מְאוֹרֶסֶת לִי הֲרֵי אַתְּ לִי לְאִינְתּוּ הֲרֵי זוֹ מְקוּדֶּשֶׁת אֲבָל הִיא שֶׁנָּתְנָה וְאָמְרָה הִיא הֲרֵינִי מְקוּדֶּשֶׁת לְךָ הֲרֵינִי מְאוֹרֶסֶת לְךָ הֲרֵינִי לְךָ לְאִינְתּוּ אֵינָהּ מְקוּדֶּשֶׁת
§ After discussing the sources for the modes of acquisition listed in the mishna, the Gemara analyzes these halakhot in greater detail. The Sages taught in a baraita (Tosefta 1:1): How is betrothal performed through money? If a man gave a woman money or an item worth money, and he said to her: You are hereby betrothed [mekuddeshet] to me, or: You are hereby betrothed [me’oreset] to me, or: You are to me as a wife, then she is betrothed. But if she is the one who gave the money to him, and she said: I am hereby betrothed [mekuddeshet] to you, or: I am hereby betrothed [me’oreset] to you, or: I am hereby to you as a wife, then she is not betrothed.
Here is a link to Dr. Adler's full text of the Brit Ahuvim ceremony:
https://www.ritualwell.org/ritual/brit-ahuvim-lovers-covenant
https://www.ritualwell.org/ritual/brit-ahuvim-lovers-covenant