A Man of Your Word

(3) If a householder makes a vow to יקוק or takes an oath imposing an obligation on himself, he shall not break his pledge; he must carry out all that has crossed his lips.

לא יחל דברו, ככל היוצא מפיו יעשה . The last four words in this verse appear superfluous, since if we are prohibited from breaking a vow, we must obviously do according to what we have vowed. The moral lesson the Torah wishes to convey is therefore not connected to the laws of vows and oaths, rather the Torah emphasizes that we must keep our word even if what we have said was not said in the form of a promise or vow...

For the heart of his fellow relies upon him and trusts in him, inasmuch as the gift in question is so small. And if it is a poor man to whom he made the promise, even though the gift mentioned was a large one (for which reason the poor man should have doubted the promise) and he goes back on his word, then his evil is very great, for he has made a vow and transgressed the commandment, "He shall not break his word" (Num. 30:3). And thus it is with one who boasts before many that he will give a gift to a certain man, this is very much like a promise, for he boasts of his generosity, and therefore it is not right that he should go back on his word after he has honored and praised himself in this matter.

(183) And likewise one who says that he will give his fellow a small gift, even though he does not mention any expression of promise. And our Rabbis, may their memory be blessed, said (Bava Metzia 49a) it is because [there is] bad faith with this. As since the gift is small, his fellow counts on it; that he will surely give it. And if it is to a poor person, his evil is great even if the gift was large - for he surely vowed it (since charity is like a vow); and it is stated (Numbers 30:3), “he shall not profane his word.”

(22) When you make a vow to your God יקוק, do not put off fulfilling it, for your God יקוק will require it of you, and you will have incurred guilt;

(9) If you say, "I will donate money to charity" or "this coin is charity" you must immediately give it to the poor, and if you delay [giving it to them] you are in violation of the commandment, "You must not delay," because you could have given it immediately. If there are no poor people available, you may set the money aside until you find some poor people. If you pledge charity in the synagogue which is to be entrusted to the treasurer, you are not in violation until the treasurer demands the money. Then [if you do not give it] you are immediately in violation; unless you know that he doesn't need the money for immediate [distribution] but will merely hold it in his possession.

If someone vows to give charity to the poor, he is obligated to pay it immediately. And if by way of forgetfulness, a delay of the vow happens to him, this too will surely be punished. For since he knows that forgetfulness is found with people, he should have remembered his vows and constantly put them into his heart, so that he would not forget them... Therefore, his punishment for his negligence is severe... why do you vow, if you are not careful with your vows and bring guilt upon yourself? And our Rabbis, may their memory be blessed, have said about the iniquity of [unfulfilled] vows (Shabbat 32b) that children die [as a result]... if one does vow, he incurs guilt. For a vow is a stumbling block for the one who vows, lest he profane his word or delay fulfilling it. Rather a righteous man is gracious and gives without his vowing. [It is hence forbidden to vow] except for when he calls out from distress.

(24) You must fulfill what has crossed your lips and perform what you have voluntarily vowed to your God יקוק, having made the promise with your own mouth.

מוצא שפתיך תשמור, “that which has come forth from your lips you should observe and do.”

מוצא שפתיך תשמר, "You shall carry out what you have promised with your lips." The Torah suggests that you should wait before making a vow, a promise, until you are in a position to honour it forthwith. In that event it is perfectly acceptable for you to make vows.

Another meaning of our verse may be this: the words מוצא שפתיך תשמר mean that you should be very careful before you say anything (as it may be in the nature of a commitment). If, however, you did say something, treat it as if it were as sacred as a vow, i.e. כאשר נדרת לשם אלוקיך נדבה, "as if you had made a sacred vow to the Lord your G'd, instead of merely a voluntary gift of a secular nature..."

The meaning of the words מוצא שפתיך, is the actual vow. The words תשמור ועשית, refer to carrying out all the conditions of the vow, i.e. כאשר נדרת ליקוק אלו-היך, “as you vowed to the Lord your G’d in the free-willed gift of your heart.” The additional words אשר דברת בפיך “as you said with your mouth,” mean that you will not omit any detail of what you promised to do. The Torah says all this to demonstrate how seriously it takes a vow. This is why the penalty for failing to keep such a commitment is so extreme, i.e. it is considered a sin against one’s soul.

כאשר נדרת, “as you have vowed, voluntarily.” No one forced you to make such a vow, so that not honouring it, or delay in honouring it is entirely your fault.

(3) WHICH THOU HAST PROMISED WITH THY MOUTH. After the vow has come out of your mouth you cannot take it back.

We have explained this portion from the vantage point of sanctifying one's body and one's financial dealings. But the choicest part of sanctifying one's body is sanctifying the mouth... From this stems the duty of a person to fulfill everything that comes out of his mouth... And even though this is mentioned in connection with vows, that is as an additional warning [not to default on vows]. Regardless, it is also stated about everything. For our external speech flows from our inner speech, and that is the speech that God and the angels use. And it is this speech that God uses when speaking with us... Hence, all of a person's toil should be towards his mouth... But the generation of the flood, as well as the generation of the [Tower of Babel], did not stand by their inner speech. Hence anyone who does not stand by his word must accept upon himself [the curse of (Bava Metzia 44a),] "He Who exacted payment from the people of the generation of the flood, and from the generation of [the Tower of Babel], will exact payment [from whoever does not stand by his statement]."