Holy Kissing; part III in a series on embodied prayer

Thanks to Derachecha (halacha about women in women's voices), Dr. Solomon Mowshowitz

What Jewish objects do we kiss?

JewishVirtualLibrary.org

Although kissing holy objects is not a religious obligation, it is a widespread practice among Jews. In the Torah, a kiss was deemed more than a welcoming. To kiss a holy object displays veneration. This symbolically represents one’s devotion to Judaism and loyalty to God. Examples of kissing holy objects include:

• The two ends of the atarah of the tallit are kissed just before putting on the prayer shawl.
• The tefillin are kissed when taken out and returned to their bag.
• The tzitzit (fringes) are kissed at the end of Baruch she-Amar and during the recitation of the Shema.
• The curtain of the ark (parochet) is kissed before opening and after closing (when the Torah is taken out and then returned).
• The Torah mantle is kissed when it passes by in procession in the synagogue.
• The Torah scroll is kissed before one recites the blessings over it, either with the intermediary of the edge of the tallit or the sash used to tie the scroll together, but never with the bare hand.
• A siddur (prayer book) and Chumash are kissed before putting them away; they also are kissed if accidentally dropped on the floor.
• The mezuzah on the doorpost is kissed when entering or leaving a house.

Some have a custom of kissing the etrog after services on Hoshana Raba (the 7th and final day of Sukkot)
as well as the Sukkah and all 4 species of lulav/etrog

Some have a custom of kissing the matzah and marror on Passover before partaking of these!

Why do we kiss these objects?

How do you feel when you kiss a Jewish object? What do you think about?

Rabbi Adin Even-Israel Steinsaltz once noted: “This is a Jew. One who kisses a book before and after reading from it.”

Rabbi David Geffen: on Adoration and gesturing then kissing hand

https://www.atlantajewishtimes.com/learned-kiss-torah/

Touching the Torah (or Mezuzah) and kissing the hand: are you kissing the Torah or is the Torah kissing you?

(not sure if this is my own insight or if I learned it somewhere)

Kissing the Tallit/Tzitzit: Rabbi David Golinkin :

https://schechter.edu/is-there-an-obligation-to-kiss-the-tzitzit-responsa-in-a-moment-vol-13-no-3/

Question from Rabbi Steve Morgen, Houston, Texas:

There is a widespread custom to kiss one’s tzitzit three times during the recitation of the third paragraph of the Shema, upon pronouncing the word emet immediately after the end of Shema, and again upon pronouncing the word la’ad. On the other hand, there are renowned rabbis such as the Vilna Gaon and Rabbi Prof. Saul Lieberman who did not kiss their tzitzit at all. What are the sources and approaches regarding these customs?

(Various customs: looking, holding, touching the tzitzit which various rabbinic authorities say are obligated, forbidden, or permitted)

IX) Kissing the Tzitzit

This is the prevailing custom today, but it is mentioned mainly from the sixteenth century onwards. I found only one mention of this custom in the time of the Rishonim (ca. 1000-1500), in an anonymous halakhic work published just once from a manuscript, in 1929...

The Rema, Rabbi Moshe Isserles (Poland, 1530-1572) writes in his Darkhei Moshe to Tur OH 24, subparagraph 1:
And I have seen those whose custom it is to kiss the tzitzit and to place it on their eyes while reciting the verse “and you shall look upon it and remember”, all of which is intended to express affection for the mitzvah. And so he writes in his glosses to Shulkhan Arukh OH 24:4:

Some have the custom of kissing the tzitzit while looking at it, and all of this is hibub mitzvah (loving the mitzvah).

One of the ways of expressing hibub mitzvah was – and still is – kissing the ritual object. Among other things, it was the custom to kiss tefillin (OH 28:3); a Torah scroll (Rema to OH 149:1, in the name of the Or Zaru’a; cf. Samuel Krauss, Korot Batei Hetefillah Beyisrael, New York, 1955, pp. 274-276); the mezuzah (Yoreh De’ah 285:2 in the Rema; Yam Shel Shlomo to Yevamot, loc. cit.; Hayyei Adam 15:1);(9) and one of the holy books (Arukh Hashulhan, Yoreh De’ah 282:11).

Moreover, Rabbi Isaiah Horowitz, author of the Shelah (Ashkenaz and Eretz Yisrael, 1565-1630), writes in Massekhet Pesahim of Shenei Luhot Habrit: “And I have seen the select few who love mitzvot, who used to kiss the matzot and the maror and all the mitzvot at the time they are observed; and so too the sukkah upon entering or leaving it, and so too the four species of the lulav, all of it to express affection for the mitzvah”. And this can be learned from what the Rema wrote about kissing the tzitzit in OH 24 (Shelah, ed. Jerusalem, 5729, Part II, fol. 20b, quoted briefly in Ateret Zekeinim to OH 12, and from there in Kaf Hahayyim to OH 24, paragraph 19).

X) Not to Kiss the Tzitzit

1. As we have seen, this was the custom of the Vilna Gaon, according to Sefer Ma’aseh Rav, No. 39:

During the recitation of Shema, he holds the two tzitzit in front of him without kissing them at all.

Ma’aseh Rav Hashalem explains (in note 3) that the Vilna Gaon acted in this fashion so as not to abolish the mitzvah of seeing the tzitzit. In my opinion, there is a simpler explanation. It appears from Bei’ur Hagra to OH 24, cited above, that the Vilna Gaon’s custom did not derive from opposition to kissing the tzitzit. The Vilna Gaon always sought a talmudic/midrashic source for every paragraph in the Shulkhan Arukh, since he only considered the Talmud/Midrash as authoritative for deciding halakhah.(10)

My teacher Rabbi Prof. Shamma Friedman told me that our teacher Rabbi Prof. Saul Lieberman – the greatest Talmud scholar in the twentieth century – did not hold his tzitzit nor kiss them while reciting the Shema. Prof. Lieberman stressed to his students that he was not belittling the prevalent custom, but it was not his custom. Prof. Lieberman was born in Lithuania and studied in yeshivot there, so it is likely that they followed there the original custom, quoted above, of looking at the tzitzit without holding or kissing them.

XII) Conclusions and Practical Halakhah

We have seen above many customs concerning what one does with the tzitzit during the recitation of Shema, along with some opposition to these customs. Now, we shall present the customs in three categories:

1. To pass them over the eyes or to look at/see them or to lift them up and show them, all in accordance with the verse “and you shall look upon it”;
2. To touch or hold the tzitzit;
3. To kiss them, as an expression of hibub mitzvah.

Clearly, the first category fits the verse “and you shall look upon it” and thus, there is no reason to oppose these customs.

The second category met with the fierce opposition of Rav Natronai Gaon and Rav Moshe Gaon on the grounds of “arrogance”. “Arrogance”, however, is a halakhic term that depends on sociology – on a specific time and place. If a person strives to outdo others by ostentatious observance of the mitzvah, “it looks like arrogance”. It could be that in the time of Rav Natronai Gaon in Babylon, holding the tzitzit looked like arrogance. Today, given the fact that almost everyone holds the tzizit in his hand, there is nothing arrogant about it.

The third category, kissing the tzitzit, arises from the desire to express affection for the mitzvot, just as we kiss the Torah scroll, the tefillin, the mezuzah, and more. There is no obligation to do so, but it is a beautiful way of expressing hibub mitzvah.

May it be God’s will that by doing these actions during the recitation of the Shema, we may fulfill the verse “and you shall look upon it and remember all the commandments of the Lord and do them”.

David Golinkin
Jerusalem
12 Adar II 5779

https://thehalacha.com/wp-content/uploads/Vol16Issue4.pdf

What are your experiences with kissing the mezuzah?

Rabbi Dr. Ari Zivotofsky:

Misconception: There is a Talmudic source for the common practice of kissing the mezuzah upon entering and exiting a room.

Fact: There is no Talmudic source obligating one to kiss the mezuzah, although there may be a source for touching the mezuzah. Kissing the mezuzah seems to have been introduced by the Arizal (sixteenth century), and is thus a relatively recent custom.

Background:

The mitzvah of mezuzah requires that a mezuzah be affixed to every1 doorway in one’s home. This is highlighted by the fact that one recites the berachah (“likbo’ah mezuzah”) at the time the mezuzah is affixed to the doorpost. From a halachic perspective, as long as the mezuzah is kosher and affixed to the doorpost, the mitzvah continues to be fulfilled without further active participation or acknowledgment on the part of the occupant.

However, the Talmud alludes to the idea of having an ongoing “relationship” with the mezuzah (Avodah Zarah 11a):

Onkelos the son of Kalonymus converted to Judaism. The emperor sent a contingent of Roman [soldiers] to pursue him, but he enticed them by [citing] Scriptural verses, and they converted to Judaism. The Emperor then sent another Roman cohort, instructing them not to say anything to him. As they were about to take him into custody, he said to them: “Let me tell you . . . ,” and they too converted. He [the emperor] dispatched another cohort and ordered them not to engage in any conversation with Onkelos.

As they seized him and were walking, Onkelos saw the mezuzah affixed to the doorway. He placed his hand on it and asked them, “What is this?” They said, “You tell us.” Onkelos replied, “The universal custom is a mortal king dwells within and his servants keep guard over him from without; but with the Holy One, Blessed be He, His servants dwell within while He keeps guard over them from without, as it says, ‘Hashem yishmor tzetcha u’vo’echa me’atah v’ad olam, The Lord will guard your goings and your comings, from now and forever’” (Psalms 121:8). They too converted to Judaism. He [the emperor] sent for him no more...

The Onkelos story can be interpreted in one of two ways. It is possible that touching the mezuzah, as Onkelos did, was a standard practice at the time; thus, the Gemara provides evidence that almost 2,000 years ago it was customary to have an “ongoing relationship” with the mezuzah. Alternatively, Onkelos’ act can be viewed as an impromptu gesture to win over the imperial delegation (which was subsequently used as a basis for instituting the practice of touching the mezuzah).

Nowadays, kissing the mezuzah is a well-known practice as evidenced by its appearance in many twentieth-century seforim. For example, Chovat Hadar—citing the Chida7 who quotes the Arizal—states that one should kiss the mezuzah by placing one’s middle finger over the word Shakai, then kiss that finger and pray to God to be protected from the yetzer hara (Rabbi Yaakov Yeshaya Blau, 1976; p. 14). He also cites the Kuntres HaMezuzah which states that late, unnamed authorities also maintain that one should kiss the mezuzah.8 The Complete Mezuzah Guide states that “there is a dispute among the posekim whether one is required to kiss the mezuzah” (Rabbi Moshe Elefant and Rabbi Eliezer Weinbaum, ca. 1987; p. 19). In a footnote, it cites the Kitzur Shulchan Aruch (11:24) and the Misgeret Hashulchan which state that one is required to kiss the mezuzah when entering and exiting a house. Ohel Aryeh (Rabbi Label Katz, 1976; p. 121) cites the Onkelos story as well as Birkei Yosef which quotes the Arizal as stating that one should kiss the mezuzah with his middle finger (p. 123). The practice is so widespread that the late contemporary posek Rabbi Moshe Stern (the Debretziner Rav) deals with the question of which hand a “lefty” should use when kissing a mezuzah. He suggests that he use his left hand (Be’er Moshe 2:2:4). Indeed, the Steipler, who was a lefty, would kiss the mezuzah with his left hand. The Chazon Ish, however, would not touch the mezuzah, although he would look at it as he passed by (Orchot Rabbeinu, vol. 3, p. 164). Similarly, it is reported that Maharil Diskin did not touch the mezuzah but merely looked at it (Salmat Chaim 380). The leading Lithuanian halachic authority of the nineteenth century Rabbi Avraham Danzig says that when one leaves his house, he should kiss the mezuzah (Chayei Adam 15:1). The early twentieth-century Sephardic authority Rabbi Yaakov Chaim Sofer rules that when one leaves his house wrapped in his tallit on the way to shul, he should kiss the mezuzah (Kaf HaChaim, OC 25:22). The late Rabbi Dovid Lifschitz, a longtime rosh yeshivah at Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary, would touch the mezuzah as he passed it, according to one of his grandchildren.

Not all halachic authorities endorse the practice of kissing the mezuzah. Rabbi Yosef Eliyahu Henkin in Eidut Le’Yisrael (p. 159) objects to kissing the mezuzah (and sefer Torah) with one’s mouth or even with a cloth (and most likely with one’s hand as well).9 Instead he prefers the Sephardic, or more accurately, the Georgian (Soviet)10 custom of pointing and “blowing” a kiss. He offers two reasons for this. Firstly, he feels that kissing implies too much familiarity, a level of closeness that one cannot purport to have with a Torah or a mezuzah. Secondly, he opines that kissing a mezuzah even via one’s fingers or hand spreads germs, a hygienic-based halachic problem mentioned in Shulchan Aruch, OC 170:15. 11

Possibly the practice of kissing the mezuzah symbolizes one’s desire for Divine protection as well as one’s love of God and His mitzvot.

The Ktav V’Kabbalah (on Devarim 6:9) says that the mitzvah of mezuzah does not end with affixing the mezuzah to the doorpost. Rather, the mitzvah entails that one remain conscious of the mezuzah every time one enters and exits a room. To help attain this awareness, he says, the early authorities established the custom of touching the mezuzah whenever one passes it.14 So too, the Rambam (Hilchot Tefillin, Mezuzah 6:13) stresses the importance of being conscious of the mezuzah as one enters or exits a room.

Evidently, the custom of kissing the mezuzah is a recent one, and for most of Jewish history it was not a common practice. This awareness should in no way detract from the custom, but place it into perspective.

Rabbi Dr. Ari Zivotofsky is on the faculty of the Brain Science Program at Bar-Ilan University in Israel.

Rabbi Ruth Adar: Coffee Shop Rabbi

So sometimes visitors are surprised to attend services in a synagogue and see Jews carrying the Torah with reverence, touching it, and even touching it and then kissing their fingers. Isn’t that idolatry?

I like what my friend Rabbi David J. Cooper has written about this: “…if it does seem like idolatry to you, you should definitely not kiss the Torah.” If any custom or even a mitzvah feels wrong to you, don’t do it. Wait, study, and talk with a teacher that you trust. If it continues to feel wrong, trust your conscience.

Many people, myself included, kiss the Torah. I also touch the mezuzah when I go through a doorway. Here are two things to know about this practice:

Kissing any religious object (the Torah, a mezuzah, the fringes on a tallit) is not an obligation. Don’t let anyone tell you that you have to do it. It is a practice that is meaningful to some Jews and not to others.

There are many reasons for this kissing. If you ask four Jews “why kiss?” you will probably get at least five answers.

Why do I kiss the Torah when it passes by me? I kiss it out of love and reverence for what it represents. To me, it represents the centuries of Jewish striving towards holiness, centuries of struggling with a book that is passed through imperfect human hands. The Torah itself is not holy; it is a signpost that points towards holiness. When I touch it and kiss my fingers, I remind myself that it is my compass, pointing towards that which I seek.

The Shearim Metzuyanim Behalacha (Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Braun, 20th century) on the Kitzur Shulchan Aruch (חלק א - כג ס"ק א, מהדורה תשס"א) writes:

As is known, we are obligated to stand for the Sefer torah, and this is learned from the obligation to stand for a torah scholar, for if we stand for those who learn the the Torah, all the more we should stand for the Torah itself. Rashi in Avoda Zara (17a) states that it was the custom when taking leave from the Synagogue, the people would kiss the most honored among them in a sign of respect, following this it would be fitting to kiss the Sefer torah as well, in line with Kal Vechomer the Gemara makes to obligate standing for the Torah from the obligation to stand for the Talmid Chacham. This would seem to be the source for the custom to kiss the Torah scroll as it passes.

This is the interpretation of the Rema (או"ח קמט), that we bring the children towards the Torah to kiss it on post to encourage and educate them in the observance of mitzvos, that this does not mean only children, rather even adults should kiss it but that there is a value in educating the children to this as well.

The Siddur Yaavetz and other siddurim quote the custom of the Ariza"l to kiss the sefer torah, it is also said that one should kiss with his lips specifically, and not the hands as is the custom of the general public. However the Sha'ar Ephraim (שער י' ס"ד) says that if it is difficult to kiss with the lips one can kiss with his hand.

The Pninei Halacha (Rav Eliezer Melamed, 1961- ) writes: The custom is that anytime a Sefer Torah passes one should kiss it and accompany it a bit. The majority have the custom to kiss the Torah directly with their lips, but some touch with their hand and kiss the hand. It is preferable of someone is ill should not kiss the Torah with his mouth so as not to infect others with his illness.

The custom of some Spanish and Portuguese synagogues, specifically in New York and London (As I have personally witnessed them, and I cannot attest to other Shuls), practice the custom to bow slightly to the Torah as it passes.

The minhag in the Yeshiva Beis Hatalmud in Bensonhurst, NY was for the Bochurim not to kiss the Sefer Torah as they felt it was a sign of haughtiness - to suggest that the person is heimish (loosely translated as familiar or on equal terms) with the Torah

This was also the custom of some synagogues in Uzbekistan-Buchara.

Ohr Somayach: Persistent Pentateuch Pinkie Pointing People

Mr. Irv Oxlander from America-On-Line wrote:

What is the source for and the meaning of the custom to point the pinkie at the Torah during hagbah?

Dear Mr. Oxlander,

Your question is interesting because it relates to a widespread custom whose source is rather obscure.

Nachmanides remarks that the verse "accursed is the one who will not uphold the words of this Torah...," is the source for the obligation to show the written text of the Torah to the whole congregation.

It is told about the Arizal that when the Torah was held up for all the congregation to see, it was his custom to look closely at the text so that he could read the letters. The Arizal was quoted to say "that by gazing at the Torah closely so as to be able to clearly read its letters, a person is infused by a great [spiritual] light."

...The Me'am Lo'ez is the only source that mentions the custom of pointing the pinkie finger towards the text, adding that it is customary to kiss the pinkie after pointing. However, this is not a universal custom, and is not mentioned in other halachic sources.

In reply to our inquiry as to the source of this custom, Rabbi Chaim Pinchas Scheinberg, shlita, gave the following explanation: The Torah lists the ten generations from Noah until Abraham, including Yoktan, who established the largest number of families. Rashi notes that Yoktan merited establishing so many families due to his great humility as his name indicates (from the root katan-little). Rabbi Scheinberg went on to explain that when pointing at the Torah we take this lesson to heart and we point with our smallest finger - the pinkie - to indicate that we should reach out to try to gain understanding of the Torah with the utmost humility and thus merit to succeed in this aspiration.

Rabbi Chaim Falagie expounds on a second variation of the custom in which the index finger is used for pointing towards the Torah rather than the pinkie. He bases this custom on six consecutive statements in Tehilim the first of which is, "The Torah of Hashem is perfect reviving the soul...". Each one of these statements is composed of five words corresponding to the number of fingers of one hand. The second word of each statement is Hashem corresponding to the second, namely the index finger. In pointing towards the Torah with the index finger we are indicating that every word of the Torah is a Name of Hashem. For that same reason, Rabbi Falagie points out, during the wedding ceremony the ring is placed on the index finger to signify that Hashem is the unifying force binding husband and wife.

The significance and the symbolism that our Sages attach to every finger and to each part of our body is most instructive. Rabbeinu Bechaye discusses the utility of each organ and in particular the fingers, each of which serves to facilitate one of the five senses. The pinkie finger is associated with the sense of hearing and we may conjecture that this is related to the custom of pointing towards the Torah with the pinky.

the me-Am Lo’ez commentary to Deuteronomy, including the discussion of hagbaha, was written by R. Shmuel Kroizer (1921–1997), a fifth-generation Jerusalemite who lived most of his life in the Beit Hakerem neighborhood of Jerusalem. ... Thus, the earliest reference in writing to the custom of pointing to the Torah with the little finger is in fact in the book me-Am Lo’ez, but that particular section dates to 1969

...It is notable, however, that the Jewish Encyclopedia (1912) described "Russian Jews are accustomed to use . . . the little finger for the Scroll of the Law."

Rabbi Ruth Adar, Coffee Shop Rabbi:

First, a few general principles bear repeating:

1. WHEN IN DOUBT, ASK: If you are curious about a gesture or practice, ask the person doing it what they are doing and why. If everyone in the congregation is doing it, ask one of the service leaders (after the service!) It is never “stupid” or rude to ask politely about a practice so that you can learn. As Hillel teaches in the Mishnah, the shy will not learn!

2. MOST CHOREOGRAPHY IS OPTIONAL: Bow, etc, if it is meaningful to you or if you think it might become meaningful to you. If it is distracting or just “isn’t you,” that is OK. However, give yourself permission to try things out and see how they feel. Some people find that choreography makes them feel more in tune with the minyan, or closer to God in prayer: how will you know if you don’t at least try it out?

3. EXPECTED CHOREOGRAPHY: Only a few things are “required,” and those only if you are able.

• If you are able, stand for the Barechu [call to worship before the Shema].
• If you are able, stand for the Amidah.
• In most Reform congregations, stand for the Shema. [in most Conservative and Orthodox congregations, sit]
• Show respect to the Torah Scroll: Stand when it is moving or uncovered, and face towards it. Stand when the Ark is open.

4. RESPECT THE BODY: It is a mitzvah [sacred duty] to care for your body. If choreography is going to damage your back or your knees or whatever, don’t do it. If you see someone refraining from something, assume that they have a good reason and don’t bug them about it.

5. ESCHEW OSTENTATION: Both the ancient rabbis (Berakhot 34a) and Reform tradition frown on showy displays of piety. If something is meaningful to you, that’s OK. But keep in mind that you are doing this for yourself and for prayer, not for a show for anyone else.

Physical acts complement the verbal ones

Ideally, they make the prayers more meaningful, while helping regain our attention in order to throw oneself into the prayer.

And they raise questions worth reexamining from time to time of why we do them and the significance to ourselves and our communities.