Tishs-bo-av

when it comes to TBA- everyone speaks in context of the Griz who says that there are two parts of TBA its a yom tannis and therefore we have -???
and its a yom avlouies and therefore we have ??
tosfos in yevmoues explain that bc it is an avluis derabim there are things which are much more strict such as the actions those are much more machmiar. while the other things we are makul and the gemrah explains that because its a avlouis dechadsha and therefore we cant feel it as much we are not as connected it happened 2000 years ago.
so today I want to talk about that gap that between the avlouis deyishan and avlouis dechadsha.
Q-so what are we supposed to feel, and how and whether we can?
lets start with anylzing some of the halchouis and asking some qustions
the tur in orch chaim writes that we dont say tachuchun on Tisbav bc...

the rav asks how cna this be that tisha abv is a moad and he claims that the tur and shulcan aruch got this idea from a chudish that they made it up and it is no where in the torah/gemrahs/rishniom.
he says that the reason that we dont say tachuch is because we know that there is a halchchc that when your mind is in tzar you are not allowed to ask hahshem for stuff you have to wait until you are in the prpoper mindset and then daven. ( where is this halchca bring it down ) the rav says that the idea of tishabav that your midn is in such a state of tzar and in pain you cnat daven tachucn, or slechouis, or say tsakebel ( which is a form of tacchucim ) in kadish. bc you are in so much pain of the day.
so qustion number one is that how can the rav say that you are in so much pain didt the gemrah in the griz both say that its a avlouis yishan its not new its old. we cant feel anything we cant connect.

there is a halchca on tishabv that you have to sit on the ground

now we know that bc of the griz every halchca on TAB, will either be bc its a yom tannis or yom avlouis. sitting on the floor obusily stems from the avlouis part ( on yom kipper we all sit in a seat) now the weried things is that mikur hadin for avlouis you are allowed to sit on a chair
as tosfos says

also if its mdin avlouis then why does it stop halfway through you should not be able to do it like the other dinim avlouis of the day such as not greeting people, washing ect - thats qustion 2
on to qustion three the gemrah says in terms of melcha that

the shulchan aruch says

so far so good we engourgce you to hold yourself like a talmid chcham and not do melcha and mistma that din stems from din of avlouis that we have. the remas remarks are put a spin on the whole thing

the rama says the isur only applies to half a day and that it dosnt apply to miunte tasks such as tying your shoes
so again if its a stems from a din avlouis then it should last the whole day and again when it comes to hilchoues avlouis if there is a din of melcha you cant even do a shnuho - you cant even turn on the light.
that is qustion number three.

qustion number 4 .
when it comes to reguler avlouis we have "heter" that you are allowed cry
in sharp contosrt - the peskuim in zechrai say something diffritn

the people ask not wheater they still have to mourn the first BH but wheater they have to cry over the first BH- again the exact oppsoit of hilchoues avlouis which there is no chuyiv to cry. here they are crying.
the fifth qustion
when it comes to regluer avhouis
you are an oniun then there is the avlouis shiva, then shlshiom , then 12 chodsh
when it comes to tish ab its flipped first 30 days then 9 days then tish aba - anunuis then after chatzotz its avlouis
whats psahat in that diffrince
so thats are five qustions

lets start with the answer
the rav says yes its true there is avlouis and tannis and yes within avlouis there is 2 parts but there is more its a thrid part a yom kuiyn.
he explaisn that when we have a avluis yeishan we need halchoues to briong ourslef into an avluis chadsah. we need soemthign to fill that void soemthing to make that chrobon happen as if its today. to create for yourself a day of crying making for yourself throught the halchoues brining yourself to an emotinal uphevael and you cant do anyhting that do bc your so sad. in order to get there you need an education to how to get there and that is
kuiyns they are they way we eductae ourself and bring on a avlouis chadsah -
the rav says that you have to say kuiyns bc otherwise it wasnt a avlouis chadhsa u didt feel anyhting. this will explain many things

so yeshivas al hakriak - the fact that you cant do anyhting of yom kuin of avlouis chadsha that ends at chaotzh
thats why after mincha we say anununu we daven normally.
sitting on the floor is part making it a avlouis chadsha but once the zman for kuynuis ended then there is no din of making it a din of chadsha. sitting on the floor dosnt stem from avlouis it stem from a yom kuins.- ( thats why echia in berchoues is called megliash kuiyns )
same thing with the rema munite task are allowed bc they wont distact me from the goal of the day. but big tasks will.
this explais also
that the shulchan aruch says

that during the time of kuyins you cant take your mind off the proccess you have to be getting yourslef to a avlouis chadsha. it woundt work if you are talking.
and again this explains why the gemrha says your not allowed to cry to much for a death but the yershmal says - if you add onto tish ab av hari ze misbach - bc its not avlouis its connecitng us to soemthing real right now.
and why is the order diffrint beacusee they have untily diffrint piont for avlouis we are trying to get you back into life while tish aba is trying to bring you to a state of aununus - weeping . of an avlouis chadsha
so we should look at the yesdois of the kuyuins, which the yesod of all of them is that we are distant from hashem- and that bc something happned we asscoite with all jewish histroy and be sad that it happend as if it happend to me
they also all have a hiddion level of nechma in all of them-
which leads us now to the next part what is the necham. that we should be feeling on tish abv. bc as much as it brings us to a level of emotnial upheavel it is also the being of the shvua denchamta.
so what is the nechma on tish abav?

so agian all the rishiom asks what is the necham but before we get to that lets zoom out and see some of the halchoues of tish ab

the mahram says that on tishavb you dont put on tefflin bc its a yom mar while the rosh says that we do ok ( they argue about what to comapir the day of avluis to of tish abav)
howeve there is a thrid shita and that is of the rambam

there was a mimhag to put on there shel yad but not there shel rosh ?
what is the logic behind this?
the gemrah in moad katen tells us that in tish abav you are not allowed to learn:

the aurch ahshelcn asks a bomb qustion. the promblom of learing torah should apply to everhting makes us happy. bc everhting even the sad torah is still a fufflumine of the pausk of פִּקּוּדֵי ה׳ יְשָׁרִים מְשַׂמְּחֵי לֵב
so whats pshat
lets back up and look at the last peskuim of meglaish achich

we know that we repeate the seoncd to last pausk to leave off in a good note
but why not just leave off the lats two peskuim. or put it beofre hahsvnui why are we eneding on that.

the midrash asks this and answerns that its like a father getting upset a kid the only reason the father get upset is bc he is a father bc he cares
the last pasuk is saying you got angry - which shows we have a realship with Hahshem and he will never leave us. so true we want to end off on a high note but the necham is hiddin in the last pasuk thats within the anger hahshem cares about us, ANd IS NOT GIVING UP ON US.
this examples everhting-