אמר רב יהודה אמר רב: מעשה באדם אחד שנתן עיניו באשה אחת והעלה לבו טינא. ובאו ושאלו לרופאים ואמרו אין לו תקנה עד שתבעל. אמרו חכמים ימות ואל תבעל לו. תעמוד לפניו ערומה. ימות ואל תעמוד לפניו ערומה. תספר עמו מאחורי הגדר. ימות ולא תספר עמו מאחורי הגדר.
Rav Yehuda says that Rav says: There was an incident involving a certain man who set his eyes upon a certain woman and passion rose in his heart. And they came and asked doctors what to do. And the doctors said: He will have no cure until she engages in sexual intercourse with him. The Sages said: Let him die; she may not engage in sexual intercourse with him. The doctors said: She should stand naked before him. The Sages said: Let him die; she may not stand naked before him. The doctors suggested: She should converse with him behind a fence. The Sages insisted: Let him die; she may not converse with him behind a fence.
(יב) וְכֵן אָסְרוּ חֲכָמִים שֶׁלֹּא יְשַׁמֵּשׁ אָדָם מִטָּתוֹ וְלִבּוֹ מְחַשֵּׁב בְּאִשָּׁה אַחֶרֶת. וְלֹא יִבְעל מִתּוֹךְ שִׁכְרוּת וְלֹא מִתּוֹךְ מְרִיבָה וְלֹא מִתּוֹךְ שִׂנְאָה וְלֹא יָבוֹא עָלֶיהָ עַל כָּרְחָהּ וְהִיא יְרֵאָה מִמֶּנּוּ. וְלֹא כְּשֶׁיִּהְיֶה אֶחָד מֵהֶן מְנֻדֶּה. וְלֹא יָבוֹא עָלֶיהָ אַחַר שֶׁגָּמַר בְּלִבּוֹ לְגָרְשָׁהּ. וְאִם עָשָׂה כֵּן הַבָּנִים אֵינָן הֲגוּנִים אֶלָּא מֵהֶן עַזֵּי פָּנִים וּמֵהֶן מוֹרְדִים וּפוֹשְׁעִים:
(12) Similarly, the sages forbade a man to have marital relations while thinking of another woman. Nor may he initiate sex while drunk, nor out of spite or hatred, nor may he rape her or initiate sex while she is afraid. Nor may they have sex while either of them are excommunicated nor after he has decided to divorce her. If [the husband] does any of those things, the children will not be proper [citizens] but brazen, rebellious [people] and criminals.
(57) And they said, “Let us call the girl and ask for her reply.” (58) They called Rebekah and said to her, “Will you go with this man?” And she said, “I will go.”
(1) ונשאלה את פיה AND ASK HER [MOUTH] — From this we may infer that a woman should not be given in marriage except with her own consent (Genesis Rabbah 60:12). (1) ותאמר אלך AND SHE SAID, I WILL GO — of my own accord even though you do not consent (Genesis Rabbah 60:12).
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Reading the Women of the Bible
Tikva Frymer-Kensky (pp. xiv-xv)
Biblical thinkers...were very aware of social problems, trying to ameliorate the suffering of the downtrodden, curtailing abuses... [T]he Bible did not eliminate patriarchy, [but it] also does not defend the status quo, for the idea of social revolution is integral to biblical thought.”
[emphasis added]