Introduction:
When we are in the Yom Kippur services, the communal recitals of our confessions typically move quickly. The intention of this Source Sheet is to offer an opportunity to slow down, contemplate, and digest the meaning of our confessions - so that during services we can mean it!
The reader will get more out of the discussions suggested on this Source Sheet having read this article with FAQ’s about Yom Kippur Confessions: Al Chet, by R. Lawrence Hoffman PhD https://reformjudaism.org/we-have-sinned
Why, when Teshuvah is a personal endeavor,
do we recite confessions in unison as a community?
"Our Sins? They're Not All Mine!" by Rabbi David Teutsch, PhD
From We Have Sinned, Ed. Lawrence Hoffman, pp. 134-138
Jewish tradition holds that reconciliation with God must be preceded by reconciliation with other people. The month of Elul and the period from Rosh Hashanah to Yom Kippur are designated as a time to accomplish that task, which requires not only apology but also a concerted effort to repair the damage to others that has resulted from the transgressions. Yom Kippur focuses on the relationships between people and God. If the confession is the individual's effort to return to God, why does it repeatedly say "we" rather than "I"? There are several answers to this question, and they are not mutually exclusive.
Sometimes, sins are not simply between one person and another; they entail complicity across an entire community. A communal confession allows for the possibility that any single wrong may well have occurred in part because of invisible sins of silence when tochecha [rebuke] should have been offered.
Another function of communal confession is its emphatic statement of behaviors the community considers unacceptable. We can understand this as a general form of admonition, by which the community proclaims its expectations to its members. "we" affirm the standards of our community together.
R. Nachman of Bretzlav, Likkutei MoHaRa”N I 270, Translation by R. Jonathan Slater
We are frequently aroused in our spiritual practice by our fellows. When we witness them recite their requests, prayers for forgiveness and supplications with passionate arousal and a broken heart, we are aroused as well. We are moved to look at ourselves, and so wake up spiritually to recite our own petitions with aroused hearts.
In the same way, we can arouse ourselves, listening to our own words. So, when we recite our own requests and supplications with great arousal, crying out “woe is me!”, this wakes us up. We begin to take stock: “Where am I? Who is it who is crying out this way? When I say ‘woe is me’ is it not really me about whom I’m speaking?” This leads us to cry out again “woe is me”, this time really knowing the “me” we speak of. Even though at first it seemed to us that we were speaking the truth, nevertheless we see how great is the difference between then and now.
Discussion
Rabbi Teustch and Rabbi Nachman appeal to very different aspects of our sensibilities. For the sake of group conversation, can you recap the two arguments each makes for communal confession?
Which descriptions appeal to you? Are there other reasons you feel are important to include in the conversation?
Vidui Zuta, also known as the Short Confession or Ashamnu
Our communal confession begins with Ashamnu, in which there is one word representing each letter of the Hebrew alphabet. It is thus both contained and inclusive of everything. The Short Confession begins with the assertion that we are not so arrogant and stubborn as to say we have not sinned, for we have sinned. Hebrew has several words for "sin" or "transgression" or "missing the mark" or "erring."
Viddui (English translation from Forms of Prayer, Reform Synagogues of Great Britain)
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אָשַׁמְנוּ. בָּגַדְנוּ. גָּזַלְנוּ. דִּבַּרְנוּ דֹּפִי: הֶעֱוִינוּ. וְהִרְשַׁעְנוּ. זַדְנוּ. חָמַסְנוּ. טָפַלְנוּ שֶׁקֶר: יָעַצְנוּ רָע. כִּזַּבְנוּ. לַצְנוּ. מָרַדְנוּ. נִאַצְנוּ. סָרַרְנוּ. עָוִינוּ. פָּשַׁעְנוּ. צָרַרְנוּ. קִשִּׁינוּ עֹרֶף: רָשַׁעְנוּ. שִׁחַתְנוּ. תִּעַבְנוּ. תָּעִינוּ. תִּעְתָּעְנוּ: |
Ashamnu, bagadnu, gazalnu, dibarnu dofi. He’e’vinu, v’hirshanu, zad’nu, chamas’nu, tafalnu shaker. Ya’atz’nu ra, kizav’nu, latz’nu, marad’nu, ni’atz’nu, sarar’nu, avinu, pasha’nu, tzarar’nu, kishinu oref. Rashanu, shichat’nu, Ti’av’nu, ta’i’nu, tita’nu. |
We have abused, we have betrayed, we have been cruel. We have destroyed and embittered other people’s lives. We were false to ourselves. We have gossiped about others and hated them. We have insulted and jeered. We have killed. We have lied. We have misled others and neglected them. We were obstinate. We have perverted and quarreled. We have robbed and stolen. We have transgressed through unkindness. We have been both violent and weak. We have practiced extortion. We have yielded to wrong desires, misplaced our zeal. |
Rabbi Debra Orenstein explores each word of the Ashamnu acrostic, offering a meditation practice for each of the confessional words and each of the forgiveness words. The full meditation is at:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JYOW1SH1awE_NmhWy5dV36tDZNh3oT-6zmKMypu48bU/edit?usp=sharing
Here is an abridged version:
Viddui/Ashamnu Meditations
by Rabbi Debra Orenstein
Vidui / Ashamnu Meditations, by Rabbi Debra Orenstein, abridged
Ten times during Yom Kippur, we recite the confessional (in Hebrew, Viddui, sometimes also called the Ashamnu prayer). In this familiar acrostic, the first letter of each sin named corresponds to a letter of the Hebrew alphabet, with the final letter of the alphabet repeated, for a total of 23 sins. It’s as if to say, “God, we know our shortcomings run from a to z.; please forgive us.” The Ashamnu, together with the Al Chet (a longer recitation of sins), gives us common wording, spoken repeatedly in community. We list our sins in the plural because we pray corporately, taking responsibility for the society we have jointly created, and supporting our fellows and comrades. Using the plural insures that no one is embarrassed by being singled out. The repetition insures that no one is able to ignore the call or retreat into denial. Ten times over, the liturgy asks us to consider: how does each of these sins apply in my life?
Rabbi Max Artz wrote of the Viddui: “These confessions are prompted by the belief that sin distorts and diminishes the divine image in which man was created.” Over the course of Elul and the Days of Awe, may the words of the prayers resonate in your heart, call to your awareness what needs to be healed, and inspire you to make positive changes. Let the divinity in you that is now encumbered be released, in all its glory.
Ashamnu is often translated as “We are guilty.” That translation may be misleading, because “guilt” for American Jews can signify an over-weaning or inappropriate sense of responsibility. Worse yet, guilt can be understood as “that which others unfairly ascribe to you, as a manipulation.” Ashamnu means “we are culpable.” We have, indeed, done wrong this year. Let’s not shy away from that or excuse it too readily. If we are to heal our wrongs, first we have to acknowledge them.
Bagadnu means we have betrayed. The word for garment or robe has the same root – b.g.d. The noun and the verb have the idea in common of covering – covering our bodies with clothing, or covering our true intentions and hence acting treacherously. How have you been disloyal – and to whom – by covering things over this year?
Gazalnu means we have robbed. The root can mean to rob, seize or tear away. Poignantly, in Job 24:9, g.z.l. is used to describe tearing away an orphan child from the breast. Ask yourself, how can I replace, restore, mend?
Dofi means blemish or fault. Dibarnu Dofi means “we have spoken slander,” but with the implication that we are looking to find fault and perhaps even relishing the blemishes of others. Even if the blemish or fault we observe in someone is real, we are guilty of lashon hara (harmful speech and gossip) when we speak about it to others. Blemishes must be met with understanding or, occasionally, with loving, private rebuke to the person in question– not with shame or advertising.
He’evinu comes from the root a.v.n. meaning trouble, sorrow, or suffering, as well as sin, wickedness, or idolatry. This verb is in the causative form: we have caused avon. Sometimes, it is translated as “we have acted perversely” or “we have caused perversion,” because of the deliberate nature of avon. Ish avon in the Bible is a trouble-maker or noxious person.
Vehirshanu The Hebrew word ra is usually translated as evil or wickedness, but it can also mean harm. This verb is the causative form, meaning “we have caused evil and/or harm.” How have I caused harm this year – by omission and commission, willfully and accidentally, to those close to me and to strangers?
Zadnu means to behave arrogantly, proudly, or presumptuously. It comes from a root which also means to boil or to seethe. We think, in English metaphors, of seething or boiling over with anger, but in the biblical image we seethe or boil over with pride, which may lead to anger. What is boiling up inside me?
Chamasnu means “we have been violent.” It can refer to physical violence or to ethical wrongs we commit. Zephaniah 3:4 talks about doing violence to the Torah, in a spiritual sense. Are there people or values have I done violence to during this past year — in deed, in word, and in thought?
Tafalnu sheker means “we have smeared with lies” (see Psalms 119:69). The root t.f.l. can mean to smear or plaster over. So we are alluding to lies that don’t just contradict the truth, but attempt to cover up or smother it. What lies beneath the lies I have told this year?
Ya’atznu ra means “we have counseled/advised evil/harm.” We may have given harmful advice, intentionally or unintentionally. We may have egged someone on, reinforcing their worst instincts. What does my inner Counselor say? And what is your good counsel about my evil counsel?
Kizavnu means “we lied” or “we were false.” Its most famous use in the Bible is in Psalms 116:11: kol ha’adam kozev, everyone is false. The literal translation of that verse is: the whole person is false. Most of us don’t lie on the witness stand or perpetrate other heinous falsehoods. Nevertheless, there is a way in which, for each of us, our whole personhood is false. So often, we are simply fake. We try to please people by saying what we think they want to hear. In the name of protecting ourselves, we fail to be true to ourselves or fully honest with others. It’s time to admit that this “protection” is hurting more than helping. Most people see through our masks anyway. God knows all. Falsehood wears on the soul. That may be why the noun form of the root k.z.v. means disappointing, as well as deceptive. The reflexive verbal form also means to disappoint. Truth is God’s seal – and a better way. How might I be more true?
Latznu means we have scorned or mocked. Proverbs 9:12 teaches: “If you scorn, you alone shall bear it.” By mocking, we intend to diminish the object of our scorn. We may (sadly) achieve that, but we certainly diminish ourselves.
Maradnu means “we have rebelled.” In the Bible, it refers both to political rebellion and to rebellion against God. Job talks about mordei ohr, those who rebel against the light (24:13). That is a fair description of most of us, at one time or another. Just as our ancestors were afraid to be present at Mt. Sinai, we resist basking in God’s light and Presence. Bring a notebook and a timer or alarm clock to a quiet place. On a blank page in the notebook write: “I have rebelled against rightful authority.” Pause and notice what comes immediately to mind. Make a note about it. Then write, “I have resisted the Light.” Again, notice what immediately comes to mind and record it. You have planted a seed with this meditation, and it will bear good fruit.
Niatznu means “we have spurned or shown contempt.” When we spurn or show contempt for what is holy, we lack the strength to bring forth our dreams and birth a better world. Having made it through one more year, we are the remnant who are left. Let us spend our time and energy in gratitude, not in contempt.
Sararnu, like maradnu, can be translated, “we have rebelled,” but m.r.d. refers more to the act of rebelling, while s.r.r. connotes the quality of being rebellious and stubborn. Consider what stubbornness has cost you. Sit quietly and see if you can be flexible with your stubbornness. Can you be patient with it? Stubbornly attacking your stubbornness will not heal it ☺. Awareness, action, and forgiveness will.
Avinu In the Bible, the word avon refers to three things: iniquity, guilt for iniquity, and punishment for iniquity. The illusion or miscalculation of the sinner in the crucial moment of choice is that s/he can derive immediate gratification from the sin, but avoid guilt and punishment, or postpone them indefinitely. It is built into Biblical Hebrew that iniquity cannot be separated from its consequences.
Pashanu means “we have transgressed,” and it implies a serious transgression. In modern Hebrew, one translation is “felony.” Like avon, pesha refers not just to the sin itself, but to the guilt or punishment that follows from it. Pesha can even refer to a sacrifice made in atonement for a transgression, letting us know that repentance is intimately tied up with sin, and that sin holds the seed of repentance in it. On a blank page in the notebook write: “Repentance is embedded in even the worst of my sins.” Take a few moments to list some of your many options with regard to teshuvah. In what ways is repentance accessible and available to you?
Tzararnu The noun tzar means “adversary” and the verb tzarar means “to treat like an adversary”: specifically, to oppress, vex, show hostility to, compete with, or be sharp to. On a blank page in the notebook write: “How do I treat others, myself, and God as adversaries?” Sit with the question, and give some time and thought to all three parties. Take a few moments to remember times when you treated others, yourself, and God as allies and friends. What can you do today to be a better friend and ally? May your intentions bear good fruit.
Kishinu oref literally means “we have stiffened our necks.” Figuratively, it means we have been inflexible and stubborn. On a blank page in the notebook write: “How am I rigid and stubborn, particularly in persisting with bad acts or destructive thoughts?” Take a few moments to consider if there is any way your inflexibility can serve a positive purpose. Could you be stubborn and inflexible about your own teshuvah, for example? May even your negative qualities be mobilized to serve your highest good. And may your awareness yield supple fruit. ☺
Rashanu means “we have done evil” or “we have done harm.” Wickedness is by its nature destructive. In this sense, there are no victimless sins. “How have I done evil or harm?” Set the alarm for five to fifteen minutes. Close your eyes and relax. Observe your thoughts as they arise and promptly release them, to the best of your ability. Breathe deeply through any defensiveness or pain. If you become distracted or mired in internal dialogue, return your focus to your breath or to the question you have written. When the alarm sounds, gently open your eyes and acclimate yourself to the room. Is there any repair you can make? Is there anyone of whom you need to ask forgiveness? If you are unsure or skeptical, is there anyone who might advise you about what you could do to heal any harm you have caused or to help an offended party feel whole? Take the appropriate steps to ensure that this meditation bears good fruit.
Shichatnu In this causative form, the root s.h.t. means to ruin, destroy, spoil, corrupt or pervert. Proverbs 6:32 is a prime example: “Whoever commits adultery lacks understanding (chasar lev). Anyone who does so perverts/corrupts/destroys his soul.” “What understanding or heart knowledge am I lacking (chasar lev) that could prevent me from ruining, destroying, spoiling, corrupting, perverting? What do I need to know?” What do you know now, in this moment – from this meditation or from before – that can help you reverse and heal destructive patterns?
Ta’ainu means “we have erred” or “we have wandered.” When Hagar wanders in the desert, physically and spiritually lost, this is the Hebrew root that describes her movement (Genesis 21:14). In what regards have you lost your way? Take a few moments to consider being lost and being found – here and now. As you move and walk today, imagine that every step you take is helping you move spiritually in the direction you need to go. Baruch ata Adonai eloheynu melech ha’olam hamechin mitzadei gaver. Blessed are you, God, Ruler of the universe, who guides our steps.
Titanu is a causative of the same root as ta’inu, and it means “we have caused (or led) others to go astray.” Just as someone who prompts others to give tzedakah is considered even more praiseworthy than someone who simply gives, anyone who causes others to sin is more culpable than someone who strays on his or her own. “To whom am I a teacher and example?”
You have completed one meditation on each word in the Viddui prayer. May your awareness and intentions bear good fruit.
Our audio CD Transformation Now focuses on the Jewish concept of teshuvah (repentance). It explains and expands on many of the ideas in the meditations above.
Traditional Al Chet
The traditional Al Chet "For the sins we have committed..." is organized around a double acrostic, in which we confess two sins based on each letter of the Hebrew alphabet. This text is translated by Chabad at https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/6577/jewish/Text-of-Al-Chet.htm
Aish does the same with questions for reflection at https://www.aish.com/h/hh/yom-kippur/guide/Exploring_the_Al-Chet_Prayer.html
In these traditional versions, because they are organized linguistically, the effect is holistic - the ideas jump around to all aspects of our lives.
The Reform Al Chet offers a different organization as well as several contemporary versions, some in the same format. They can be found in the Mishkan HaNefesh Yom Kippur Machzor https://www.ccarnet.org/publications/hhd/#dflip-df_10069/1/ starting on page 300 and continuing on the even-numbered pages.
If you have time, compare the two versions; if not, read one of them in small groups. As you go, you might want to make notes for yourself.
As you read through the confession, please notice:
- Which involve misusing our bodies? facial expressions? affect?
- Which ones, and how many, are about how we use our words?
- Which speak of kavod, dignity, for ourselves and/or others?
- Which ones are calling to you for personal growth this year?
- What does the confession teach about the role of our intentions in our transgressions? Or even our awareness? Does not knowing or being aware that we have even transgressed excuse our behavior? (hint: NO)
- Anti-racism and all anti-bias work teaches us to tend to the impact of words and actions; impact does real harm regardless of intentions. If the transgressions were unintentional, we must work to raise our awareness! What awareness-raising are you committing to in the year ahead? see http://evolve.reconstructingjudaism.org/judaism-and-race for
JUDAISM AND RACE
How do we expand our image of Jews to include people of color, and how should Jews deal with systemic racism in America?
Contemporary Al Chets
Traditional Jewish prayer services got longer over the centuries as new material was written and added without removing any of the old.
Does the traditional Al Chet say everything you need? Does it arouse enough ratzon (will) within you to make the changes your soul calls for? Or do you feel a need for new? A confession that speaks to today?
Mishkan Hanefesh Yom Kippur Machzor has several contemporary versions of Al Chet on odd pages starting on page 299. What follows here are some links to additional contemporary Al Chets.
After your Havurah explores some of them, you may want to discuss whether these new ones add something important - or help interpret the old for today - or whether you feel that something is still left unsaid. What is left?
A Prayer for the Elimination of the Sins of Racism: Al Chet by Yavilah McCoy
http://www.jewishemergentnetwork.org/al-chet
Invitation to read the introduction and to use the words of the prayer slowly enough for their meaning to resonate in our bodies.
Al Chet - Confession for the Earth
by Rabbi Katy Z. Allen
https://jewcology.org/2014/10/al-chet-confession-for-the-earth/
A contemporary Tikkun-Olam Confession by Michael Lerner
https://www.tikkun.org/for-the-sins-a-contemporary-version-of-atonement-on-yom-kippur-and-all-year-round
An Israeli Al Chet by Daniel Gordis
https://danielgordis.org/2013/09/13/for-the-sins-we-have-committed/
God of Forgiveness
Between lists of confessions, we recite this refrain:
וְעַל כֻּלָּם אֱלֽוֹקַּ סְלִיחוֹת. סְלַח לָֽנוּ. מְחַל לָֽנוּ. כַּפֶּר לָֽנוּ:
V'al kulam Eloha S'lichot. S'lach lanu, m'chal lanu, kaper lanu
For all of these failures of judgment and will, God of forgiveness - forgive us, pardon us, lead us to atonement.
Rabbi Debra Orenstein - Meditation on Forgiveness
The ultimate goal of the confessional prayers is to move beyond guilt and confession to repentance and forgiveness.
The phrase “ve’al kulam” is expansive and inclusive. “For all these things” covers everything you did – even the misdeeds you forgot about, minimized, made excuses for, or felt justified in. On a blank page in the notebook write: “Let all my sins be clear to me. Let my awareness include everything I need to know.” Today and every day, may your awareness continually grow and expand. Attend to the messages you receive, and they will bear good fruit.
Selach lanu The root s.l.ch means to forgive or pardon, and it is used Biblically to refer to God forgiving us. The words we repeat on Kol Nidrei night are God’s statement of forgiveness following the incident of the spies: salachti kidevarecha; I have forgiven, according to your [plea]” (Numbers 14:20). “Is there anyone who has requested forgiveness from me, whom I have – openly or secretly – refused to forgive completely?” Pause and notice whoever comes to mind. (Be sure to include yourself, if applicable.) Make a note about your thoughts. Then write, “How can I imitate God and forgive, despite the deed, whatever its magnitude?”
Mechal lanu The root m.ch.l. means to pardon, forgive, yield, forgo, remit, or renounce. When someone commits a sin against you, you can describe that as a spiritual i.o.u. The offending party owes an apology and restitution. But trying to collect a debt from a person who doesn’t have sufficient resources will only exhaust you. So when the reparation is incomplete or entirely owing, we can nevertheless decide to forgo payment. We let go of the expectation that we will be made whole on a particular debt, in order to be more whole, peaceful, and happy. God is willing to forgive us for our inabilities and incapacities. Can we also forgive?
Kaper lanu K.p.r. means to atone or propitiate. It also has the connotation of substitution. In the Bible, the scapegoat effects atonement by serving as the repository for the sins of the Israelites. When the goat is exiled, it symbolically carries away their sins. A goat dies instead of the people. In Yiddish, a kaparah is something bad that happens, which is considered a substitute for something even worse that might have happened. For example, if you have a minor illness, your grandmother may declare it a kaparah against a more serious one – pooh, pooh. In some way, atonement always involves substitutions: substituting new habits for old, substituting awareness for denial, substituting repentance for shame. “What am I willing to do instead of the sin that I most typically fall into? With what shall I replace it – in behavior, time, and energy?” Record any insights or intentions you want to remember.