דרש רב עוירא בשכר נשים צדקניות שהיו באותו הדור נגאלו ישראל ממצרים
§ Rav Avira taught: In the merit of the righteous women that were in that generation, the Jewish people were redeemed from Egypt.
ת"ר שבעה בנים היו לה לקמחית וכולן שמשו בכהונה גדולה אמרו לה חכמים מה עשית שזכית לכך אמרה להם מימי לא ראו קורות ביתי קלעי שערי אמרו לה הרבה עשו כן ולא הועילו
The Sages taught in a baraita: Kimḥit had seven sons, and they all served in the office of the High Priesthood, as High Priests or as his substitute. The Sages said to her: What good deeds did you perform to merit this? She said to them: In all my days, the beams of my house never saw the braids of my hair, as she was extremely modest and was strict about covering her hair even inside her own house. They said to her: Many women did so and did not succeed to such a degree; you must have been granted a special gift from God.
אומר בן עזאי חייב אדם ללמד את וכו' ר' אליעזר אומר כל המלמד את בתו תורה מלמדה תיפלות תיפלות ס"ד אלא אימא כאילו למדה תיפלות
§ The mishna states: From here ben Azzai states: A person is obligated to teach his daughter Torah, so that if she drinks and does not die immediately, she will know that some merit of hers has delayed her punishment. Rabbi Eliezer says: Anyone who teaches his daughter Torah is teaching her promiscuity. The Gemara asks: Could it enter your mind to say that teaching one’s daughter Torah is actually teaching her promiscuity? Rather, say: It is considered as if he taught her promiscuity.
(י) אֵֽשֶׁת־חַ֭יִל מִ֣י יִמְצָ֑א וְרָחֹ֖ק מִפְּנִינִ֣ים מִכְרָֽהּ׃ (יא) בָּ֣טַח בָּ֭הּ לֵ֣ב בַּעְלָ֑הּ וְ֝שָׁלָ֗ל לֹ֣א יֶחְסָֽר׃ (יב) גְּמָלַ֣תְהוּ ט֣וֹב וְלֹא־רָ֑ע כֹּ֝֗ל יְמֵ֣י חַיֶּֽיה׃ (יג) דָּ֭רְשָׁה צֶ֣מֶר וּפִשְׁתִּ֑ים וַ֝תַּ֗עַשׂ בְּחֵ֣פֶץ כַּפֶּֽיהָ׃ (יד) הָ֭יְתָה כָּאֳנִיּ֣וֹת סוֹחֵ֑ר מִ֝מֶּרְחָ֗ק תָּבִ֥יא לַחְמָֽהּ׃ (טו) וַתָּ֤קָם ׀ בְּע֬וֹד לַ֗יְלָה וַתִּתֵּ֣ן טֶ֣רֶף לְבֵיתָ֑הּ וְ֝חֹ֗ק לְנַעֲרֹתֶֽיהָ׃ (טז) זָמְמָ֣ה שָׂ֭דֶה וַתִּקָּחֵ֑הוּ מִפְּרִ֥י כַ֝פֶּ֗יהָ נטע [נָ֣טְעָה] כָּֽרֶם׃ (יז) חָֽגְרָ֣ה בְע֣וֹז מָתְנֶ֑יהָ וַ֝תְּאַמֵּ֗ץ זְרֹעוֹתֶֽיהָ׃ (יח) טָ֭עֲמָה כִּי־ט֣וֹב סַחְרָ֑הּ לֹֽא־יִכְבֶּ֖ה בליל [בַלַּ֣יְלָה] נֵרָֽהּ׃ (יט) יָ֭דֶיהָ שִׁלְּחָ֣ה בַכִּישׁ֑וֹר וְ֝כַפֶּ֗יהָ תָּ֣מְכוּ פָֽלֶךְ׃ (כ) כַּ֭פָּהּ פָּרְשָׂ֣ה לֶעָנִ֑י וְ֝יָדֶ֗יהָ שִׁלְּחָ֥ה לָֽאֶבְיֽוֹן׃ (כא) לֹא־תִירָ֣א לְבֵיתָ֣הּ מִשָּׁ֑לֶג כִּ֥י כָל־בֵּ֝יתָ֗הּ לָבֻ֥שׁ שָׁנִֽים׃ (כב) מַרְבַדִּ֥ים עָֽשְׂתָה־לָּ֑הּ שֵׁ֖שׁ וְאַרְגָּמָ֣ן לְבוּשָֽׁהּ׃ (כג) נוֹדָ֣ע בַּשְּׁעָרִ֣ים בַּעְלָ֑הּ בְּ֝שִׁבְתּ֗וֹ עִם־זִקְנֵי־אָֽרֶץ׃ (כד) סָדִ֣ין עָ֭שְׂתָה וַתִּמְכֹּ֑ר וַ֝חֲג֗וֹר נָתְנָ֥ה לַֽכְּנַעֲנִֽי׃ (כה) עֹז־וְהָדָ֥ר לְבוּשָׁ֑הּ וַ֝תִּשְׂחַ֗ק לְי֣וֹם אַחֲרֽוֹן׃ (כו) פִּ֭יהָ פָּתְחָ֣ה בְחָכְמָ֑ה וְתֽוֹרַת־חֶ֝֗סֶד עַל־לְשׁוֹנָֽהּ׃ (כז) צ֭וֹפִיָּה הֲלִיכ֣וֹת בֵּיתָ֑הּ וְלֶ֥חֶם עַ֝צְל֗וּת לֹ֣א תֹאכֵֽל׃ (כח) קָ֣מוּ בָ֭נֶיהָ וַֽיְאַשְּׁר֑וּהָ בַּ֝עְלָ֗הּ וַֽיְהַֽלְלָהּ׃ (כט) רַבּ֣וֹת בָּ֭נוֹת עָ֣שׂוּ חָ֑יִל וְ֝אַ֗תְּ עָלִ֥ית עַל־כֻּלָּֽנָה׃ (ל) שֶׁ֣קֶר הַ֭חֵן וְהֶ֣בֶל הַיֹּ֑פִי אִשָּׁ֥ה יִרְאַת־ה' הִ֣יא תִתְהַלָּֽל׃ (לא) תְּנוּ־לָ֭הּ מִפְּרִ֣י יָדֶ֑יהָ וִֽיהַלְל֖וּהָ בַשְּׁעָרִ֣ים מַעֲשֶֽׂיהָ׃
(10) What a rare find is a capable wife! Her worth is far beyond that of rubies. (11) Her husband puts his confidence in her, And lacks no good thing. (12) She is good to him, never bad, All the days of her life. (13) She looks for wool and flax, And sets her hand to them with a will. (14) She is like a merchant fleet, Bringing her food from afar. (15) She rises while it is still night, And supplies provisions for her household, The daily fare of her maids. (16) She sets her mind on an estate and acquires it; She plants a vineyard by her own labors. (17) She girds herself with strength, And performs her tasks with vigor. (18) She sees that her business thrives; Her lamp never goes out at night. (19) She sets her hand to the distaff; Her fingers work the spindle. (20) She gives generously to the poor; Her hands are stretched out to the needy. (21) She is not worried for her household because of snow, For her whole household is dressed in crimson. (22) She makes covers for herself; Her clothing is linen and purple. (23) Her husband is prominent in the gates, As he sits among the elders of the land. (24) She makes cloth and sells it, And offers a girdle to the merchant. (25) She is clothed with strength and splendor; She looks to the future cheerfully. (26) Her mouth is full of wisdom, Her tongue with kindly teaching. (27) She oversees the activities of her household And never eats the bread of idleness. (28) Her children declare her happy; Her husband praises her, (29) “Many women have done well, But you surpass them all.” (30) Grace is deceptive, Beauty is illusory; It is for her fear of the LORD That a woman is to be praised. (31) Extol her for the fruit of her hand, And let her works praise her in the gates.
Spiritual Chevruta
1. What is modesty to you? Is modesty good? Are modesty in clothing and modesty in behavior connected?
2. Have you ever learned something that felt to you like Tiflut, or promiscuity? Do you think Torah knowledge could ever be Tiflut?
3. Are the attributes of the woman described in Eishet Chayil actually virtues? Are they an impossible standard? Do the husbands have a similar archetype to look up to?
4. Have you noticed, either personally or through Jewish women in your life, any pressure to conform to these attributes of a righteous woman?
5. Do you see these standards as empowering? Stifling? Something else?
1. What is modesty to you? Is modesty good? Are modesty in clothing and modesty in behavior connected?
2. Have you ever learned something that felt to you like Tiflut, or promiscuity? Do you think Torah knowledge could ever be Tiflut?
3. Are the attributes of the woman described in Eishet Chayil actually virtues? Are they an impossible standard? Do the husbands have a similar archetype to look up to?
4. Have you noticed, either personally or through Jewish women in your life, any pressure to conform to these attributes of a righteous woman?
5. Do you see these standards as empowering? Stifling? Something else?