גם זו לטובה!
הדף מאת: רתם עגנון ויפתח לקט
דף לימוד זה עוסק בכוחה של החשיבה החיובית ובהשפעתה על חיינו. כנפיה של החשיבה החיובית פרושות מן האמונה הדתית ועד הפסיכולוגיה המודרנית. ננסה לבדוק ולנתח סוגיות בחשיבה חיובית דרך אגדות חז"ל ומקורות מודרניים. נבחן את תפקידו של מושג זה בעולם החינוך, ואת הדרכים ליישמו בשדה החינוך. מומלץ ללמוד את הדף בחברותא ואת הסרט להקרין על מסך.
סולקי, הכל לטובה לחן: איציק קרייף אריאל אלבגלי מילים: איציק קרייף אריק פורמן, מתוך אתר YuoTube
כנסו לאווירה.....
נחום איש גם זו
"פעם אחת רצו ישראל לשלוח דורון לבית הקיסר, אמרו מי ילך לשם? ילך 'נחום איש גם זו' שהוא מלומד בניסים. שלחו בידו ארגז מלא אבנים טובות ומרגליות. הלך, וישן באותו מלון, בלילה קמו דיירי המלון ונטלו את האבנים הטובות שהיו בארגז ומילאו את הארגז עפר. כאשר הגיע לשם פתחו את הארגז וראו שהוא מלא עפר, רצה המלך לקטול את כולם, מפני שאמר: 'היהודים צוחקים ממני'. אמר נחום איש גם זו: 'גם זו לטובה'. בא אליהו ונדמה למלך כאחד מבני ממלכתו ואמר לו: 'אולי העפר הזה הוא מעפרו של אברהם אביהם, שכאשר היה משליך את העפר על אויביו היה הופך לחרבות וכאשר היה משליך עליהם קש הוא היה הופך לחיצים, שנאמר 'יִתֵּן כֶּעָפָר חַרְבּוֹ כְּקַשׁ נִדָּף קַשְׁתּוֹ' (ישעיהו מא, ב)'. היתה מדינה אחת שעד אז לא היו יכולים לכובשה, בדקו את העפר הזה וכבשוה. הכניסו את נחום איש גם זו לבית גנזיו של המלך ומלאו את הארגז שלו באבנים טובות ומרגליות ושלחו אותו בכבוד גדול. בדרכם חזרה לנו בני המשלחת במלון שבו לן לפני כן. אמרו לו בני המלון: מה הבאת איתך לבית המלך שעשו לך את כל הכבוד הזה? אמר להם: מה שלקחתי מכאן הבאתי לשם. סתרו דיירים את המלון שלהם והביאו את אבניו ואת עפרו לבית המלך ואמרו לו: 'העפר שנחום איש גם זו הביא לכאן היה משלנו'. בדקו את העפר ולא גילו בו את התכונות שהיו בעפר של נחום איש גם זו, והרגו את בני המלון".
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מושגים
  • נחום איש גם זו - נחום איש גמזו היה תנא מהדור השני של התנאים.
    חלק מהחוקרים רואים בכינוי "גמזו" כמעיד על מוצאו ממקום המכונה גמזו (או גימזו). עם זאת, בספרות חז"ל נמצא קישור אפשרי בין שמו למנהגו לומר על כל דבר "גם זו לטובה". קישור מדרשי זה בשמו קישר את דמותו מיידית לתפיסה ההגותית שכל דבר המתרחש מאת ה' התרחש לטובה, וכן התקשר לדיון בשאלות "צדיק ורע לו" ו"ביטחון בה'". מקורות שונים מצביעים על קשר בין נחום איש גם זו לרבי עקיבא (ישנן גרסאות שונות לגבי מי מהם היה תלמידו של מי).
due to the fact that there are many soldiers in the city of Meḥoza, and if I let them all eat, they will take all the food I own. § The Gemara relates another story that involves an unstable wall. Ilfa and Rabbi Yoḥanan studied Torah together, and as a result they became very hard-pressed for money. They said: Let us get up and go and engage in commerce, and we will fulfill, with regard to ourselves, the verse: “Although there should be no needy among you” (Deuteronomy 15:4), as we will no longer be complete paupers. They went and sat under a dilapidated wall and were eating bread, when two ministering angels arrived. Rabbi Yoḥanan heard that one angel said to the other: Let us knock this wall down upon them and kill them, as they abandon eternal life of Torah study and engage in temporal life for their own sustenance. The other angel said to him: Leave them, as there is one of them whose time of achievement stands before him, i.e., his time has yet to come. Rabbi Yoḥanan heard all this, but Ilfa did not hear the angels’ conversation. Rabbi Yoḥanan said to Ilfa: Did the Master hear anything? Ilfa said to him: No. Rabbi Yoḥanan said to himself: Since I heard the angels and Ilfa did not hear, I can learn from this that it is I whose time of achievement stands before me. Rabbi Yoḥanan said to Ilfa: I will return home and fulfill with regard to myself the contrary verse: “For the poor shall never cease out of the land” (Deuteronomy 15:11). Rabbi Yoḥanan returned to the study hall, and Ilfa did not return, but went to engage in business instead. By the time that Ilfa came back from his business travels, Rabbi Yoḥanan had been appointed head of the academy, and his financial situation had improved. His colleagues said to Ilfa: If the Master had sat and studied, instead of going off to his business ventures, wouldn’t the Master have been appointed head of the academy? Ilfa went and suspended himself from the mast [askariya] of a ship, saying: If there is anyone who can ask me a question concerning a baraita of Rabbi Ḥiyya and Rabbi Oshaya, and I do not resolve his problem from a mishna, I will fall from the mast of this ship and be drowned. Ilfa sought to demonstrate that despite the time he had spent in business, he still retained his extensive Torah knowledge. A certain old man came and taught a baraita before him: If there is a man who, upon his deathbed, says in his will: Give a shekel to my sons every week, but this is a situation where, based on their needs, they are fit for the court to give them a sela, i.e., double the amount, they give them a sela. When the dying man mentioned a shekel, he presumably meant that they should be given a sum in accordance with their actual requirements, not that specific amount. But if he said: Give them only a shekel, the court gives them only a shekel and no more. The baraita further states that if one said: If my sons die, others should inherit their portion in their stead, regardless of whether he said: Give them a shekel, or whether he said: Give them only a shekel, then the court gives his sons only a shekel per week, as their father clearly stated that he wishes to give his sons only a specific stipend and that he intends to leave the bulk of his property to others. Ilfa said to the old man: In accordance with whose opinion is this ruling? It is in accordance with the opinion of Rabbi Meir, who said: It is a mitzva to fulfill the statement of the dead. This entire baraita can be explained based on a principle that appears in a mishna: In all cases, one should try to execute the wishes of the deceased. § The Gemara relates another story about a rundown building. They said about Naḥum of Gam Zu that he was blind in both eyes, both his arms were amputated, both his legs were amputated, and his entire body was covered in boils. And he was lying in a dilapidated house, and legs of his bed were placed in buckets of water so that ants should not climb onto him, as he was unable to keep them off in any other manner. Once his students sought to remove his bed from the house and afterward remove his other vessels. He said to them: My sons, remove the vessels first, and afterward remove my bed, as I can guarantee you that as long as I am in the house, the house will not fall. Indeed they removed the vessels and afterward they removed his bed, and immediately the house collapsed. His students said to him: Rabbi, since you are evidently a wholly righteous man, as we have just seen that as long as you were in your house it did not fall, why has this suffering befallen you? He said to them: My sons, I brought it upon myself. Naḥum of Gam Zu related to them the following: As once I was traveling along the road to my father-in-law’s house, and I had with me a load distributed among three donkeys, one of food, one of drink, and one of delicacies. A poor person came and stood before me in the road, saying: My rabbi, sustain me. I said to him: Wait until I unload the donkey, after which I will give you something to eat. However, I had not managed to unload the donkey before his soul left his body. I went and fell upon his face and said: May my eyes, which had no compassion on your eyes, be blinded; may my hands, which had no compassion on your hands, be amputated; may my legs, which had no compassion on your legs, be amputated. And my mind did not rest until I said: May my whole body be covered in boils. Naḥum of Gam Zu prayed that his suffering might atone for his failure. His students said to him: Even so, woe to us that we have seen you in this state. He said to them: Woe is me if you had not seen me in this state, as this suffering atones for me. The Gemara inquires: And why did they call him Naḥum of Gam Zu? The reason is that with regard to any matter that occurred to him, he would say: This too is for the good [gam zu letova]. Once, the Jews wished to send a gift [doron] to the house of the emperor. They said: Who should go and present this gift? Let Naḥum of Gam Zu go, as he is accustomed to miracles. They sent with him a chest [sifta] full of jewels and pearls, and he went and spent the night in a certain inn. During the night, these residents of the inn arose and took all of the precious jewels and pearls from the chest, and filled it with earth. The next day, when he saw what had happened, Naḥum of Gam Zu said: This too is for the good. When he arrived there, at the ruler’s palace, they opened the chest and saw that it was filled with earth. The king wished to put all the Jewish emissaries to death. He said: The Jews are mocking me. Naḥum of Gam Zu said: This too is for the good. Elijah the Prophet came and appeared before the ruler as one of his ministers. He said to the ruler: Perhaps this earth is from the earth of their father Abraham. As when he threw earth, it turned into swords, and when he threw stubble, it turned into arrows, as it is written in a prophecy that the Sages interpreted this verse as a reference to Abraham: “His sword makes them as the dust, his bow as the driven stubble” (Isaiah 41:2). There was one province that the Romans were unable to conquer. They took some of this earth, tested it by throwing it at their enemies, and conquered that province. When the ruler saw that this earth indeed had miraculous powers, his servants entered his treasury and filled Naḥum of Gam Zu’s chest with precious jewels and pearls and sent him off with great honor. When Naḥum of Gam Zu came to spend the night at that same inn, the residents said to him: What did you bring with you to the emperor that he bestowed upon you such great honor? He said to them: That which I took from here, I brought there. When they heard this, the residents of the inn thought that the soil upon which their house stood had miraculous powers. They tore down their inn and brought the soil underneath to the king’s palace. They said to him: That earth that was brought here was from our property. The miracle had been performed only in the merit of Naḥum of Gam Zu. The emperor tested the inn’s soil in battle, and it was not found to have miraculous powers, and he had these residents of the inn put to death. § The mishna taught: What is considered a plague of pestilence? If it is a city that sends out five hundred infantrymen, and three dead are removed from it on three consecutive days, one dead per day, this is a plague of pestilence. The Sages taught: If a city that sends out fifteen hundred infantrymen, i.e., one that has a population of at least fifteen hundred men, e.g., the village of Akko, and nine dead are removed from it on three consecutive days, i.e., three dead per day, this is considered a plague of pestilence. If all nine died on a single day, while none died on the other days, or if the nine died over a period of four days, this is not a plague of pestilence. And a city that sends out five hundred infantrymen, for example, the village of Amiko, and three dead are removed from it on three consecutive days, this is a plague of pestilence.
דיון
דרכו של נחום איש גם זו
  • מהי תגובתכם הראשונית לקריאת הסיפור? מה הוא מעלה בכם?
  • מה יוצא דופן בהתנהגותו של נחום איש גם-זו? היכן הדבר בא לידי ביטוי בטקסט?
  • אילו הסיפור היה נגמר אחרת, למשל - 'והקיסר ניסה לכבוש מדינה שלא כבשה עד אז ולא הצליח לכובשה" - מה הייתה לדעתכם תגובתו של נחום איש גם זו?
  • נסו לתמצת את שיטתו וגישתו לחיים של נחום איש גם-זו. האם באמת ניתן לחיות כך?
  • תן חיוך
    מבחן התוצאה...
    ... רבי עקיבא, שהיה מהלך בדרך, הגיע לאותה עיר. ביקש מלון ולא נתנו לו.
    אמר, כל מה שעשה ה' - לטובה.
    הלך ולן בשדה והיו עימו תרנגול וחמור ונר.
    באה רוח וכָבָה הנר.
    בא החתול - אכל את התרנגול.
    בא האריה, ואכל את החמור.
    אמר: כל מה שעשה הקדוש ברוך הוא לטובה עשה.
    בו בלילה באו גייסות ושבו את העיר.
    אמר רבי עקיבא - וכי לא אמרתי לכם "כל מה שעושה הקדוש ברוך הוא הכל לטובה?"
    One who enters a bathroom says to the angels who accompany him at all times:
    Be honored, honorable holy ones, servants of the One on High,
    give honor to the God of Israel,
    leave me until I enter and do my will and come back to you.
    Abaye said: A person should not say this, lest they abandon him and go. Rather he should say:
    Guard me, guard me,
    help me, help me,
    support me, support me,
    wait for me, wait for me until I enter and come out, as this is the way of man.
    Upon exiting, one says:
    Blessed…Who formed man in wisdom,
    and created in him many orifices and cavities.
    It is revealed and known before the throne of Your glory
    that were one of them to be ruptured or blocked, it would be impossible to survive and stand before You. The Gemara asks: With what should one conclude this blessing? Rav said: One should conclude: Blessed…Healer of the sick. Shmuel said: Abba, Rav, has rendered everyone sick. Rather, one should say: Healer of all flesh. Rav Sheshet said: One should conclude: Who performs wondrous deeds. Rav Pappa said: Therefore, let us say them both: Healer of all flesh, Who performs wondrous deeds. The Gemara proceeds to cite additional blessings recited as part of one’s daily routine. One who enters to sleep on his bed recites Shema in his bed from Shema Yisrael to VeHaya Im Shamoa. Then he recites:
    Blessed…Who makes the bands of sleep fall upon my eyes and slumber upon my eyelids,
    and illuminates the pupil of the eye.
    May it be Your will, O Lord my God,
    that You make me lie down in peace and give me my portion in Your Torah,
    accustom me to mitzvot and do not accustom me to transgression,
    lead me not into error, nor into iniquity, nor into temptation nor into disgrace.
    May the good inclination have dominion over me
    and may the evil inclination not have dominion over me.
    Save me from an evil mishap and evil diseases.
    Let neither bad dreams nor troubling thoughts disturb me.
    May my bed be flawless before You, that my progeny should not be flawed.
    Enlighten my eyes in the morning lest I sleep the sleep of death, never to awaken.
    Blessed are You, O Lord, Who gives light to the whole world in His glory. When one awakens, he recites:
    My God, the soul You have placed within me is pure.
    You formed it within me,
    You breathed it into me,
    and You guard it while it is within me.
    One day You will take it from me and restore it within me in the time to come.
    As long as the soul is within me, I thank You,
    O Lord my God and God of my ancestors, Master of all worlds, Lord of all souls.
    Blessed are You, O Lord, who restores souls to lifeless bodies. Upon hearing the sound of the rooster, one should recite: Blessed…Who gave the heart [sekhvi] understanding to distinguish between day and night.
    Upon opening his eyes, one should recite: Blessed…Who gives sight to the blind.
    Upon sitting up straight, one should recite: Blessed…Who sets captives free.
    Upon dressing, one should recite: Blessed…Who clothes the naked, as they would sleep unclothed.
    Upon standing up straight, one should recite: Blessed…Who raises those bowed down.
    Upon descending from one’s bed to the ground, one should recite: Blessed…Who spreads the earth above the waters, in thanksgiving for the creation of solid ground upon which to walk.
    Upon walking, one should recite: Blessed…Who makes firm the steps of man.
    Upon putting on his shoes, one should recite: Blessed…Who has provided me with all I need, as shoes are a basic necessity.
    Upon putting on his belt, one should recite: Blessed…Who girds Israel with strength.
    Upon spreading a shawl upon his head, one should recite: Blessed…Who crowns Israel with glory. Upon wrapping himself in ritual fringes, one should recite: Blessed…Who has made us holy through His commandments and has commanded us to wrap ourselves in a garment with ritual fringes.
    Upon donning his phylacteries on his arm, one should recite: Blessed…Who has made us holy through His commandments and has commanded us to don phylacteries.
    Upon donning phylacteries on his head one should recite: Blessed…Who has made us holy through His commandments and has commanded us with regard to the mitzva of phylacteries.
    Upon ritually washing his hands: Blessed…Who has made us holy through His commandments and has commanded us with regard to the washing of the hands.
    Upon washing his face, one recites: Blessed…Who removes the bands of sleep from my eyes and slumber from my eyelids.
    And may it be Your will, O Lord my God, to accustom me in Your Torah,
    attach me to Your mitzvot, and lead me not into transgression,
    nor into error, nor into iniquity, nor into temptation nor into disgrace.
    Bend my evil inclination to be subservient to You,
    and distance me from an evil person and an evil acquaintance.
    Help me attach myself to the good inclination and to a good friend in Your world.
    Grant me, today and every day, grace, loving-kindness, and compassion in Your eyes and the eyes of all who see me,
    and bestow loving-kindness upon me.
    Blessed are You, O Lord, Who bestows loving-kindness on His people, Israel. We learned in the mishna: One is obligated to recite a blessing for the bad that befalls him just as he recites a blessing for the good that befalls him. The Gemara asks: What does it mean: One is obligated to recite a blessing for the bad just as for the good? If we say this means that just as one recites a blessing for a positive event with the formula: Who is good and does good, so too one recites a blessing for a calamity with the formula: Who is good and does good, didn’t we learn in our mishna that over good tidings one recites: Who is good and does good, while over bad tidings one recites: Blessed…the true Judge? Rather, Rava said: The mishna’s statement was only necessary to instruct us to accept bad tidings with the same joy with which we accept good tidings, not to instruct with regard to which blessing to recite. Rav Aḥa said in the name of Rabbi Levi: What is the verse that alludes to this? “I will sing of loving-kindness and justice; unto You, O Lord, will I sing praises” (Psalms 101:1). Rav Aḥa explains: If it is loving-kindness, I will sing, and if it is justice, I will sing. I will thank God in song for the bad just as for the good. Rabbi Shmuel bar Naḥmani said: The proof is from here, as it is stated: “In God, I will praise His word; in the Lord, I will praise His word” (Psalms 56:11). The Gemara explains that In God, I will praise His word; that is the revelation of God’s attribute of benevolence, while: In the Lord, I will praise His word; that is the attribute of suffering; even if God brings suffering to bear upon me, I will still praise Him. Rabbi Tanḥum said: The proof is from here, as it is stated: “I will lift up the cup of salvation and call upon the name of the Lord” (Psalms 116:13), and: “I found trouble and sorrow, but I called upon the name of the Lord” (Psalms 116:3–4). And the Rabbis said: The proof is from here, as it is stated: “The Lord has given and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21). Rav Huna said that Rav said that Rabbi Meir said; and so it was taught in a baraita in the name of Rabbi Akiva: One must always accustom oneself to say: Everything that God does, He does for the best. The Gemara relates: Like this incident, when Rabbi Akiva was walking along the road and came to a certain city, he inquired about lodging and they did not give him any. He said: Everything that God does, He does for the best. He went and slept in a field, and he had with him a rooster, a donkey and a candle. A gust of wind came and extinguished the candle; a cat came and ate the rooster; and a lion came and ate the donkey. He said: Everything that God does, He does for the best. That night, an army came and took the city into captivity. It turned out that Rabbi Akiva alone, who was not in the city and had no lit candle, noisy rooster or donkey to give away his location, was saved. He said to them: Didn’t I tell you? Everything that God does,
    דיון
    מבחן התוצאה
    1. עם איזה סיפור אתם מזדהים יותר? מדוע?
    2. מה היתרונות של ראיית המציאות בדרך זו?
    3. מה החסרונות בכך?
    4. ספרו על מקרה בחייכם שבו נקטתם גישה זו?
    5. האם היה מקרה שבו לא נקטתם גישה זו ואתם מצטערים על כך?
    6. האם הייתם רוצים לאמץ גישה זו בחייכם? מדוע?
    7. מה היה קורה אילו סיפורו של רבי עקיבא היה נגמר אחרת? עדיין הייתם חושבים אותו הדבר?
    דיון
    שאלות מנחות לצפייה בסרט "כשהאסימונים נופלים"
    במהלך הסרט חשבו:
  • מהם העקרונות לשינוי שמציע ריצ'רד לבוי?
  • אילו שיטות עובדות ואילו אינן עובדות, לדעת ריצ'רד לבוי?
  • איך בונים הערכה עצמית על פי ריצ'רד לבוי?
  • בחרו משפט הנתפס בעיניכם כחשוב ומשמעותי.
  • בחרו אמירה או משפט המעוררים בכם התנגדות.
  • דיון
    לסיכום...
  • מה דעתכם על חיים לפי דרך מחשבה זו?
  • האם אפשר להתקדם ולהשתפר אם מסתכלים כל הזמן על חצי הכוס המלאה?
  • מהי הדרך לגשר על הפער שבין הגישה ש"הכול לטובה" לבין הצורך שלנו להיות ביקורתיים ולנסות לשפר את חיינו כל העת?
  • קישורים לרקע והרחבה:
    פסיכולוגיה חיובית