As queer people, so much of Jewish ritual was not created for us, and does not include us, at least in its original form. As such, we need to think seriously about what ways we can excavate ritual and reconstruct it into a Judaism that works for us.
Judith Plaskow says elsewhere:
Commitment to “women’s experience” marks precisely an a priori commitment to women’s humanity. It is the fundamental feminist methodological move... [it] is to say that women as well as men define Jewish humanity and that there is no Judaism—there is only male Judaism—without the insights of both.
So too with queer Judaism: Straight Judaism, which is all we had for thousands of years, is only a fraction of the Judaism we do have, and we will need to excavate, turn over, and perhaps even create anew the rest in order to reveal it in full. That's the project here. We're going to examine one location where that might be possible.
(א) בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' אֱלהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעולָם אֲשֶׁר יָצַר אֶת הָאָדָם בְּחָכְמָה וּבָרָא בו נְקָבִים נְקָבִים חֲלוּלִים חֲלוּלִים. גָּלוּי וְיָדוּעַ לִפְנֵי כִסֵּא כְבודֶךָ שֶׁאִם יִפָּתֵחַ אֶחָד מֵהֶם או יִסָּתֵם אֶחָד מֵהֶם אִי אֶפְשַׁר לְהִתְקַיֵּם וְלַעֲמוד לְפָנֶיךָ אֲפִילוּ שָׁעָה אֶחָת:
(ב) בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' רופֵא כָל בָּשר וּמַפְלִיא לַעֲשות:
Blessed are you God, Master of the Universe, who formed the human in your wisdom and created inside of them many orifices and cavities. It's obvious and known before your Seat of Honor that if one (that should remain closed) opened or one (that should remain open) was closed, we would not be able to arise and stand before you for even one moment. Blessed are you God, who heals all flesh and acts wondrously.
(א) כָּל הַיּוֹם כְּשֶׁעוֹשִׂים צְרָכָיו בֵּין קְטַנִּים בֵּין גְּדוֹלִים מְבָרֵךְ אֲשֶׁר יָצַר, וְלֹא עַל נְטִילַת יָדַיִם, אַף אִם רוֹצֶה לִלְמֹד אוֹ לְהִתְפַּלֵּל מִיָּד
(1) Every day when "visiting the facilities," whether urination or defecation, bless "Who has formed" and not "concerning the washing of the hands," even if one wants to learn or pray immediately.
’ומפליא לעשות,’ מפני שאדם דומה לנוד מלא רוח, יאם יעשה אדם בנוד נקב כחדה של מחו הרוח יוצא, והאדם מלא נקבים ורוחו משתמרת בתוכו, הרי זה פלא. ועוד יש לפרש, על שם שבורר טוב המאכל ודוחה פסולת.
The phrase “One who acts wondrously” is because man is comparable to a flask full of air. If one makes a hole the size of the point of a needle in the flask, the air will escape, whereas man is full of openings and yet his air is preserved inside him. This is a wonder! A further explanation is that it is because the body picks out the good from the food one eats and rejects the waste.
(א) דין ברכת אשר יצר ואלהי נשמה ופירושיו. ובו ד"ס:
המפה, ר׳ משה איסרליש
הגה ועוד יש לפרש שמפליא לעשות במה ששומר רוח האדם בקרבו וקושר דבר רוחני בדבר גשמי והכל הוא ע"י שהוא רופא כל בשר כי אז האדם בקו הבריאות ונשמתו משתמרת בקרבו (דברי עצמו):
HaMapah, R' Moshe Iserless
(Gloss on "Who acts wondrously") And furthermore, there are those that explain that "Who acts wondrously" refers to that [God] keeps the spirit of human beings in their innards and binds something spiritual to something physical, and all this is on account of that God is the healer of all flesh because then human beings stay on the line of health, and their soul is kept in their innards (Divrei Atzmo).
(כ) וְשָׁלַחְתִּ֤י אֶת־יָדִי֙ וְהִכֵּיתִ֣י אֶת־מִצְרַ֔יִם בְּכֹל֙ נִפְלְאֹתַ֔י אֲשֶׁ֥ר אֶֽעֱשֶׂ֖ה בְּקִרְבּ֑וֹ וְאַחֲרֵי־כֵ֖ן יְשַׁלַּ֥ח אֶתְכֶֽם׃
(20) So I will stretch out My hand and smite Egypt with various wonders which I will work upon them; after that he shall let you go.
(יא) מִֽי־כָמֹ֤כָה בָּֽאֵלִם֙ יְהֹוָ֔ה מִ֥י כָּמֹ֖כָה נֶאְדָּ֣ר בַּקֹּ֑דֶשׁ נוֹרָ֥א תְהִלֹּ֖ת עֹ֥שֵׂה פֶֽלֶא׃
(11) Who is like You, יהוה, among the celestials;
Who is like You, majestic in holiness,
Awesome in splendor, working wonders!
(יא) כִּ֚י הַמִּצְוָ֣ה הַזֹּ֔את אֲשֶׁ֛ר אָנֹכִ֥י מְצַוְּךָ֖ הַיּ֑וֹם לֹא־נִפְלֵ֥את הִוא֙ מִמְּךָ֔ וְלֹ֥א רְחֹקָ֖ה הִֽוא׃ (יב) לֹ֥א בַשָּׁמַ֖יִם הִ֑וא לֵאמֹ֗ר מִ֣י יַעֲלֶה־לָּ֤נוּ הַשָּׁמַ֙יְמָה֙ וְיִקָּחֶ֣הָ לָּ֔נוּ וְיַשְׁמִעֵ֥נוּ אֹתָ֖הּ וְנַעֲשֶֽׂנָּה׃
(11) Surely, this Instruction which I enjoin upon you this day is not too baffling for you, nor is it beyond reach. (12) It is not in the heavens, that you should say, “Who among us can go up to the heavens and get it for us and impart it to us, that we may observe it?”
I'm really interested in how פ–ל–א consistently shows up as a word used to describe God's ability to divide between things: waste and not waste, Egypt and Israel, between two literal walls of water, between instruction that is attainable and not (literally, the divide between the earth and the sky in metaphor) - not sure what to do with this but I'll leave it here for now.
כִּי מִתְּעַר אוֹמֵר: ״אֱלֹהַי, נְשָׁמָה שֶׁנָּתַתָּ בִּי טְהוֹרָה. אַתָּה יְצַרְתָּהּ בִּי, אַתָּה נְפַחְתָּהּ בִּי, וְאַתָּה מְשַׁמְּרָהּ בְּקִרְבִּי, וְאַתָּה עָתִיד לִיטְּלָהּ מִמֶּנִּי וּלְהַחֲזִירָהּ בִּי לְעָתִיד לָבֹא. כׇּל זְמַן שֶׁהַנְּשָׁמָה בְּקִרְבִּי מוֹדֶה אֲנִי לְפָנֶיךָ ה׳ אֱלֹהַי וֵאלֹהֵי אֲבוֹתַי, רִבּוֹן כׇּל הָעוֹלָמִים, אֲדוֹן כׇּל הַנְּשָׁמוֹת. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה׳, הַמַּחֲזִיר נְשָׁמוֹת לִפְגָרִים מֵתִים״.
When one awakens, one recites:
My God, the soul You have placed within me is pure.
You formed it within me,
You breathed it into me,
and You guard it while it is within me.
One day You will take it from me and restore it within me in the time to come.
As long as the soul is within me, I thank You,
O Lord my God and God of my ancestors, Master of all worlds, Lord of all souls.
Blessed are You, O Lord, who restores souls to lifeless bodies.
One who enters a bathroom says to the angels who accompany him at all times:
Be honored, honorable holy ones, servants of the One on High,
give honor to the God of Israel,
leave me until I enter and do my will and come back to you.
Abaye said: A person should not say this, lest they abandon them and go. Rather they should say:
Guard me, guard me,
help me, help me,
support me, support me,
wait for me, wait for me until I enter and come out, as this is the way of human beings.
Upon exiting, one says:
Blessed…Who formed human beings in wisdom,
and created in them many orifices and cavities.
It is revealed and known before the throne of Your glory
that were one of them to be opened or blocked, it would be impossible to survive and stand before You.
^This isn't something where we leave our angels behind- the rabbinic idea of angels empower us to perform this task. They are recognizing something wondrous in the act of our body filtering properly
(ד) אֵין שִׁעוּר לְהַשְׁתִּין מַיִם כִּי אֲפִלּוּ לְטִפָּה אַחַת חַיָּב לְבָרֵךְ, שֶׁאִם יִסָתֵם הַנֶּקֶב מִלְּהוֹצִיא הַטִּפָּה הַהִיא הָיָה קָשֶׁה לוֹ וְחַיָּב לְהוֹדוֹת:
(4) There is no specific amount of urinating required, because even if one urinates a single drop one must bless ["Asher Yatzar"], because one's opening may have been blocked from urinating that drop and so it may have been difficult for them, and so they are required to give thanks.
הגה: וי”א [ויש אומרים] גם אשר יצר, ואפילו לא עשה צרכיו, וכן נהגו
Gloss: There are those who say also [to recite first thing in the morning] Asher Yatzar, even if they did not relieve themselves, and this practice has been adopted.(Abudirham)
^last two sources^ Every opportunity should be taken to say Asher Yatzar
וצריכין ליזהר אותם הנעורים כל הלילה שלא לברך על נטילת ידים בבוקר רק אחר שעשה צרכיו קודם התפלה ואז מברך על נט"י ואשר יצר וכמבואר לעיל בסימן ד' סק"ל ע"ש
One who is up all night needs to be careful that the do not make a Netillat Yadyim in the morning unless they first used the bathroom before davening. Then they may make an Al Netillat Yadyim and an Asher Yatzar like we explained [before].
Counterpoint to the preceding source - Is Asher Yatzar something associated with a specific act, or does it speak to something broader about the way human beings conceptualize their own bodies?
Still up in the air as to whether or not I want to cut this section
And the third blessing is: Blessed are You…Who made humanity in God's image, in the image of the likeness of God's form, and out of God's very self formed a building (see Genesis 2:22) for eternity. Blessed are You, Lord, Creator of mankind.
Similarly, we learned in a baraita: Ben Azzai said: I once entered a bathroom after Rabbi Akiva, and I learned three things from observing his behavior: I learned that one should not defecate while facing east and west, but rather while facing north and south; I learned that one should not uncover himself while standing, but while sitting; and I learned that one should not wipe with their right hand, but with their left. Rabbi Yehuda said to him: You were impertinent to your teacher to that extent? He replied: It is Torah, and I must learn.
Rav Kahana entered and lay beneath Rav’s bed. He heard Rav chatting and laughing with his wife, and doing the things that he needed to do, i.e., having sex with her. Rav Kahana said to Rav: The mouth of Abba, Rav, is like one whom has never eaten a cooked dish, i.e., his behavior was lustful. Rav said to him: Kahana, you are here? Leave! It isn't ok to hide under someone's bed while they have sex. Rav Kahana said to him: It is Torah, and I must learn.
If sex is Torah, all Torah requires a blessing- by the transitive property, does sex need a brakhah?
שְׁלֹשָׁה אֵין נִכְנָסִין לַגּוּף, וְהַגּוּף נֶהֱנֶה מֵהֶן, אֵלּוּ הֵן: רְחִיצָה, וְסִיכָה, וְתַשְׁמִישׁ. שְׁלֹשָׁה מֵעֵין הָעוֹלָם הַבָּא, אֵלּוּ הֵן: שַׁבָּת, שֶׁמֶשׁ, וְתַשְׁמִישׁ. תַּשְׁמִישׁ דְּמַאי? אִילֵּימָא תַּשְׁמִישׁ הַמִּטָּה — הָא מִכְחָשׁ כָּחֵישׁ! אֶלָּא תַּשְׁמִישׁ נְקָבִים.
Three matters do not enter the body yet the body benefits from them, and they are: Washing, anointing, and tashmish (usage). Three matters are microcosms of the World-to-Come, and they are: Sabbath, the sun, and tashmish (usage). The Gemara asks: Usage of what benefits the body and is a microcosm of the World-to-Come? If you say that it refers to conjugal relations, doesn’t that weaken the body (a reference to exhaustion after the refractory period)? Rather, it refers to usage of orifices (lit: "holes"), relieving oneself.
רַב כָּהֲנָא הֲוָה פָּסֵיק סִידְרָא קַמֵּיהּ דְּרַב. כִּי מְטָא לְהַאי קְרָא, נְגֵיד וְאִתְּנַח. אֲמַר, שְׁמַע מִינַּהּ בְּטֵל לֵיהּ חֶמְדֵּיהּ דְּרַב. אָמַר רַב כָּהֲנָא, מַאי דִּכְתִיב: ״כִּי הוּא אָמַר וַיֶּהִי״ — זוֹ אִשָּׁה. ״הוּא צִוָּה וַיַּעֲמוֹד״ — אֵלּוּ בָּנִים. תָּנָא: אִשָּׁה חֵמֶת מָלֵא צוֹאָה, וּפִיהָ מָלֵא דָּם — וְהַכֹּל רָצִין אַחֲרֶיהָ.
The Gemara relates that Rav Kahana was reading biblical verses before Rav. When he got to this verse, Rav sighed. Rav Kahana said: We can derive from this that Rav’s desire has ceased. Rav Kahana also said: What is the meaning of that which is written: “For He spoke and it was, He commanded and it stood” (Psalms 33:9)? He understands this to mean that God created man with desires that push him to do things he would not do if he acted purely on the judgment of his intellect, and Rav Kahana therefore interprets the verse in the following manner: “For God spoke and it was”; this is a woman that a man marries. “God commanded and it stood”; these are the children who one works hard to raise. A tanna taught in a baraita: A woman is essentially a flask full of feces, a reference to the digestive system, and her mouth is full of blood, a euphemistic reference to menstruation, yet men are not deterred and they all run after her with desire.
אֲמַר לֵיהּ: מַאי דִּכְתִיב, ״בָּרְכִי נַפְשִׁי אֶת ה׳ וְכָל קְרָבַי אֶת שֵׁם קָדְשׁוֹ״? אֲמַר לֵיהּ: בֹּא וּרְאֵה שֶׁלֹּא כְּמִדַּת הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא מִדַּת בָּשָׂר וָדָם. מִדַּת בָּשָׂר וָדָם צָר צוּרָה עַל גַּבֵּי הַכּוֹתֶל, וְאֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לְהָטִיל בָּהּ רוּחַ וּנְשָׁמָה קְרָבַיִם וּבְנֵי מֵעַיִם. וְהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא אֵינוֹ כֵּן, צָר צוּרָה בְּתוֹךְ צוּרָה וּמֵטִיל בָּהּ רוּחַ וּנְשָׁמָה קְרָבַיִם וּבְנֵי מֵעַיִם. וְהַיְינוּ דְּאָמְרָה חַנָּה: ״אֵין קָדוֹשׁ כַּה׳ כִּי אֵין בִּלְתֶּךָ וְאֵין צוּר כֵּאלֹהֵינוּ״. מַאי ״אֵין צוּר כֵּאלֹהֵינוּ״ — אֵין צַיָּיר כֵּאלֹהֵינוּ.
Once, Rabbi Shimon ben Pazi said to him: What is the meaning of that which is written: “Bless the Lord, my soul, and all that is within me bless His Holy name”? Rav Shimi bar Ukva said to Rabbi Shimon ben Pazi: Come and see that the attribute of the Holy One of Blessing, is not like the attribute of flesh and blood, as this verse praises the formation of a person in their mother’s womb. The attribute of flesh and blood is such that they shape a form on the wall for all to see, yet they cannot instill it with a spirit and soul, bowels and intestines. While the Holy One of Blessing, is not so, as God shapes one form within another form, a child in its mother’s womb, and instills it with spirit and soul, bowels and intestines. And this is the explanation of what Hannah said with regard to the birth of Samuel: “There is none holy like the Lord, for there is none like You, and there is no Rock like our God” (I Samuel 2:2). What is the meaning of there is no rock [tzur] like our God? There is no artist [tzayyar] like our God.
Come and see...- He reasoned what we must be taught from intestines and bowels
^^Even our bowels and intestines have Torah to teach us
בְּנֹהַג שֶׁבָּעוֹלָם מֶלֶךְ בָּשָׂר וָדָם בּוֹנֶה פָּלָטִין בִּמְקוֹם הַבִּיבִים, וּבִמְקוֹם הָאַשְׁפָּה, וּבִמְקוֹם הַסָּרִיּוֹת, כָּל מִי שֶׁהוּא בָּא לוֹמַר פָּלָטִין זוֹ בְּנוּיָה בִּמְקוֹם הַבִּיבִים וּבִמְקוֹם הָאַשְׁפָּה וּבִמְקוֹם הַסָּרִיּוֹת, אֵינוֹ פּוֹגֵם. כָּךְ כָּל מִי שֶׁהוּא בָּא לוֹמַר הָעוֹלָם הַזֶּה נִבְרָא מִתּוֹךְ תֹּהוּ וָבֹהוּ, אֵינוֹ פּוֹגֵם, אֶתְמְהָה.
In the way of the world, when a king builds a palace in a place of sewers, dunghills, and garbage, everyone who says: "This palace is built on sewers, dunghills, and garbage" discredits/misunderstands it. So too, everyone who says the universe was created from nothingness discredits/misunderstands it.
משכן גאוה: חגיגה של גאוה יהודי חיים ועבודה
תפילות וברוכות יומים,
רבי אפרת רותם, 2011, תרגום ביד רבי סוג׳א ק. פילז, דוקטורט
ברוכה את יה, רוח העולם, המפליאה לעשות, אשר יצרה אותי בגופי בדיבור אחד, הנוסכת סלווה בנפסי ועוז בלבי. כפנים הגדולות המאירות את העולם, "יאר ה׳ פניו אלינו ויחוננו." בפנים אוהובות אדע כי "מצאתי חן בעיניך להכירני" גוף האדם פנים ואחור ימים ושמאל, כנגד ארבעה רוחות עולם, שט על ימים, מרחיק עד כוכבים, מתקיים ברגעובאין–זמן, כרמז לעולמות עליונים. מודה אני לך, הטובה והמיטיבה, אשר יצרה את האדם והאשה בחלמה, רבת פגיעות, שותתת אהבה, טהורת נשמה. ברוך אתה ה׳, השם שלום בלילותינו.
Where Pride Dwells: A Celebration of LGBTQ Life and Ritual
Daily Prayers and Blessings,
Rabbi Efrat Rotem, 2011, Translation by Rabbi Sonja K Pilz, PhD
Praised are You, Spirit of the world, working wondrously, who created me as one whole body with one whole word, who pours peace into my mind and power into my body. Let Your face shine on this world, and be gracious to us. In the face of Your love, I will know that I please You and that You recognize me. My body is made of right and left, front and back, like a map of this world. It sails on water, it stretches out to the stars, it lives in the moment and will remain forever- an unalterable part of the worlds above. Thank You, who blesses the world with abundance and wonders; who created the human body with mercy, vulnerability, overflowing love, and purity of soul. Praised are you, Eternal, who gives us peace at night.
Note the female God-language in this prayer, which fits in with the blessing's overall shift towards the feminine God ("נבקים")
Also note here how the blessing changes the use of "המפליאה" to refer to something whole/unified rather than something divided.
Blessed are you, Adonai our God, Sovereign of the universe, who formed the human body with skill, creating the body's many pathways and openings. It is well known before your throne of glory that if one of them be wrongly opened or closed, it would be impossible to endure and stand before you.
May the day come when it is also well known that if just one unique body within your creation is not allowed to make its distinctive beauty manifest in the world, it is impossible for all of Your creation to thrive and rise each day joyfully before you.
Blessed are You, Source of all life and form, who implanted within us the ability to form ourselves–molding, changing, transitioning, and adorning our bodies–so that the fullness of our many genders, the abundance of our desires, and the diversity of our souls can be revealed.
ברוכה אתה ה׳ אלוקינו מלך העולם אשר יצרה את בני ובנות אדם חוה בחכמה
Blessed are You, Adonai our God, who has made me your partner in daily completing the task of my own formation.
–by Rabbi Elliot Kukla, 2012
ואשר יצר את האדם בצלמו בצלם דמות תבניתו והתקין לו ממנו בנין עדי עד ברוך אתה ה' יוצר האדם
...who has shaped humanity in Your image, patterned after Your image and likeness, and enabled them to perpetuate this image out of their own being. Blessed are You, Adonai, shaper of humanity.
בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' אֶלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם אַשֶׁר קִדְּשָׁנוּ בְּמִצְוֹתָיו וְצִוָּנוּ לַעֲשׂוֹת גְבוּלִין גְבוּלִין אִסוּרִין וְהֶתֱרִין, וְנַתָן לָנוּ חֻקִים וּמִשְׁפָּטִים לְהַבְחִין בֵּין הֶקְדֶשׁ וְחוּלִין, וּלְהַבְדִיל בֵּין טְמֵאִים וּטְהוֹרִים: גַלוּי וְידוּעַ לְךָ שֶׁאִם לֹא נְתַתָּם לָנוּ וְלֹא לִימַדְתָּנוּ אִי אֶפְשַׁר לָנוּ לְהִתְקַיֵּם וּלְהִיוֹת עָמְךָ. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' הַנוֹתֵן תוֹרָה לְעָמוֹ וּרְשׁוּת לִפְסוֹק הָלֳכָה לְדַייַנֵי בְּנֵי בְרִיתוֹ, לַעֲשׂוֹת קְשָׁרִים טְהוֹרִים וְחַיִים קְדוֹשִׁים
Rabbis Amitai Adler and Julie Pelc Adler, replacement for Birkat Eirusin
Blessed are You, Adonai our God, Sovereign of the Universe, who has sanctified us with mitzvot, and commanded us to set boundaries of varying kinds, and proscriptions and permissions; and has given us laws and legislations that we may discern between the sanctified and the mundane, and separate between the pure and the impure. Behold it is manifest and known before You that had You not given us these things, and had not taught us those things, it would be impossible for us to continue, or to be Your people. Blessed are You, Adonai, who gives Torah to His people, and jurisdiction to interpret the halachah to the judges among your covenant-partners, that they may make pure bonds between people, and create holy lives.
Awe is more than an emotion; it is a way of understanding, insight into a meaning greater than ourselves. The beginning of awe is wonder, and the beginning of wisdom is awe. Awe is an intuition for the dignity of all things, a realization that things not only are what they are but also stand, however remotely, for something supreme.
Awe is a sense for the transcendence, for the reference everywhere to mystery beyond all things. It enables us to perceive in the world intimations of the divine, to sense in small things the beginning of infinite significance, to sense the ultimate in the common and the simple; to feel in the rush of the passing the stillness of the eternal.
What we cannot comprehend by analysis, we become aware of in awe.