On Sunday evening, after we had returned from the lovely Chanukah party, Stephnie and I went to the see the newest film adaptation of Louisa May Alcott's 'Little Women' which was simply wonderful.
I have long been a huge fan of this story, perhaps because I can relate to the story of four headstrong young ladies, which remind me of my own four daughters! The March girls don't have an easy time, growing up during the American Civil War, with a father who is absent for more of the time and who gets wounded in battle, but this is more than compensated for by the presence of their gentle and stoic 'Marmee'.
Amongst the many events that take place, a few stand out in my mind.
Firstly, the rivalry between Amy, the youngest of the girls and her older sister Jo, an aspiring writer.
In one pivotal scene, Jo and Meg have been invited to the theatre by their neighbour, the handsome Laurie. Amy begs to come along but is refused from doing so by Jo, even though Meg would gladly relinquish her seat. Whilst the girls are out, Amy spitefully finds Jo's manuscript hidden in a drawer and gleefully sets it alight, burning the entire tome.
Jo only finds out about this the next morning when she searches for the said manuscript. The ensuing scenes demonstrate Jo's fury at her sister's actions as she refuses to speak with her.
As an only child, I was never privy to the vagaries of sibling rivalry. I was fortunate in that I didn't grow up needing to share my valuable possessions with others. As a father of a progressively increasing family, I found it challenging to understand the concept of siblings fighting over clothes and needing to mark their territory, both figuratively and physically. It was a concept that was simply alien to me.
At the same time, my one wish from as long as I can recall was to be blessed with a sibling - most probably a brother. I know that I would have inevitably argued with him and driven my parents to distraction as a result.
With the above in mind, I wonder how it must have felt to have been Joseph at the moment when he was reunited with his brothers.
The Torah's description of that moment is described vividly in this week's parsha:
(3) Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph. Is my father still well?” But his brothers could not answer him, so dumbfounded were they on account of him.
(4) Then Joseph said to his brothers, “Come forward to me.” And when they came forward, he said, “I am your brother Joseph, he whom you sold into Egypt.
Can you just imagine the scene?
How dumbfounded the brothers must have felt when Joseph revealed his identity to them?
What could they say?
Like Jo (his namesake), Joseph's anger towards his brothers (aka Amy) could have resulted in his not wishing to communicate with them again.
But, here we are, with his brothers having fallen deeply into the bottomless pit of existence brought on by a drought in the region - he is giving them a lifeline, despite everything that has happened.
He continues:
Reading the story carefully, we note that Joseph is very quick to move on from shocking his brethren to ensuring that they know they are forgiven and that, as far as he is concerned, he would like to "move on".
Going back to 'Little Women', soon after the fight, Jo and Laurie go skating on the frozen lake near their home. Amy follows them and falls into the freezing water, only to be saved by Jo.
As Amy recuperates in bed, Jo blames herself for what has happened and realises that she could have been responsible for Amy's death. The burnt manuscript becomes but a memory.
Knowing myself, I would have probably rowed with my brother and hopefully made up, because he could have been the only person who would have truly understood the person that I am.
Modern and ancient history is replete with stories of sibling rivalry that has torn valuable foundations apart.
In music - can you imagine what we could have heard had Ray and Dave Davies not let their fraternal squabbles sink the wonderful Kinks?
What if Noel and Liam Gallagher, the talented brothers behind Oasis had not squabbled and destroyed the excellent group that they had formed together?
What about the rivalry that converted the harmonious melodies of the Everly Brothers into single voices? It took nearly thirty years for them to reunite, fortunately before Phil died in 2014. What a lost opportunity!
The book of Bereshit is replete with instances of sibling rivalry, some of which lead to reconciliations like that of Isaac and Ishmael and to a certain degree, Jacob and Esau - and those that cannot be repaired, like Cain and Abel.
And as we reach the end of the book, we realise that, like Jo and Amy, Joseph and his brothers are examples of how precious sibling relationships are.
In my case, it will always be a question of what if - but I'd like to believe that were I to have had a brother, I would still be close to him, through thick and thin.
As we look towards the Book of Shemot and marvel at the love between Moshe, Aharon and Miriam, we see that, at the heart of a truly great nation is a truly great relationship between siblings.
After all, this nuclear family was the beacon that Gd used to guide us through the desert into the land of Israel!
Shabbat Shalom.