Let's begin with a source from the the Torah. The Torah directs each Jew towards a life of holiness and specifies that a life of holiness is not to be comprised of deceitful and false dealings:
We generally think of dishonesty as a bad thing. Have you ever felt justified in being dishonest?
We see examples in the Torah and Gemara justifying white lies for the sake of "peace" (as well as for other reasons).
A second example:
BUT it's never that straightforward.
Even in the above cases, we can think about how the white lies above had negative effects.
In addition, elsewhere in the Torah, it describes how such interactions are not innocuous.
Another Jewish concept is that of genevat da'at, which is theft of one's mind, thoughts, wisdom, or knowledge, i.e., fooling someone and thereby causing him or her to have a mistaken assumption, belief, and/or impression.
The origin of the term is attributed to the Talmudic sage Samuel of Nehardea in Talmud Chullin (94a): "It is forbidden to mislead people, even a non-Jew." Indeed, one Midrash states that genevat da'at is the worst type of theft because it directly harms the person, not merely their money.
Let's examine where this concept comes from to see how the concepts of permissible white lies and genevat da'at might fit together.
Referring back to the prohibition on stealing, we see a connection between theft and deception. We see this in language used elsewhere in the Torah and Prophets:
(26) And Laban said to Jacob, “What did you mean by deceiving me (lit. stealing my heart) and carrying off my daughters like captives of the sword?
(5) And if a man approached to bow to him, [Absalom] would extend his hand and take hold of him and kiss him. (6) Absalom did this to every Israelite who came to the king for judgment. Thus Absalom won away (lit. stole) the hearts of the men of Israel.
And the gravity of theft of the heart is outlined in the Gemara:
And because he [Absalom] stole three times, committing three thefts of people’s hearts: The heart of his father, as he tricked him by saying that he was going to sacrifice offerings; the heart of the court, as he tricked them into following him; and the heart of the Jewish people, as it is stated: “So Absalom stole the hearts of the men of Israel” (II Samuel 15:6), therefore three spears were embedded into his heart, as it is stated: “Then said Joab: I may not tarry like this with you. And he took three spears in his hand, and thrust them through the heart of Absalom, while he was yet alive” (II Samuel 18:14).
Another discussion:
The above can both be prescriptive about how one should act, but it also raises the question of how to interact with others. How do we respond to deceptive people in our midst? How do our actions change if we suspect people may be acting falsely rather than assume best intentions? To what extent can such deception spill over into political or historical narratives, when is that a problem, and when is it justified?
The Gemara gives several examples of genevat da’at:
- Pressing someone to come for a meal when you know they will say no
- Opening a new bottle of wine where the guest thinks that you are doing it especially for him, but really you have to open it anyway
- Offering things that you don’t really have to people you know will refuse
- Walking into a shiva house with what looks like a bottle of wine but which is really full of water
- Selling a shoe made of leather which you say is from a shechted healthy animal but which really came from a sick animal which died
- Selling a barrel of oil which is in fact wine with only a thin layer of oil on the top
This raises many questions. How is genevat da'at different from a white lie? Does this discussion change your view on dishonesty?
"It's the strangest thing about being human: to know so much, to communicate so much, and yet always to fall so drastically short of clarity, to be, in the end, so isolate and inadequate. Even when people try to say things, they say them poorly, or obliquely, or they outright lie, sometimes because they're lying to you, but as often because they're lying to themselves."
- Claire Messud, The Woman Upstairs