ואמר רב יהודה שלשה דברים [המאריך בהן] מאריכין ימיו ושנותיו של אדם המאריך בתפלתו והמאריך על שלחנו והמאריך בבית הכסא והמאריך בתפלתו מעליותא היא והאמר רבי חייא בר אבא א"ר יוחנן כל המאריך בתפלתו ומעיין בה סוף בא לידי כאב לב שנאמר (משלי יג, יב) תוחלת ממושכה מחלה לב וא"ר יצחק שלשה דברים מזכירים עונותיו של אדם ואלו הן קיר נטוי ועיון תפלה ומוסר דין על חבירו לשמים הא לא קשיא הא דמעיין בה הא דלא מעיין בה והיכי עביד דמפיש ברחמי והמאריך על שלחנו דלמא אתי עניא ויהיב ליה דכתיב (יחזקאל מא, כב) המזבח עץ שלש אמות גבוה וכתיב (יחזקאל מא, כב) וידבר אלי זה השלחן אשר לפני ה' פתח במזבח וסיים בשלחן ר' יוחנן ור' אלעזר דאמרי תרוייהו כל זמן שבהמ"ק קיים מזבח מכפר על ישראל ועכשיו שלחנו של אדם מכפר עליו והמאריך בבית הכסא מעליותא הוא והתניא עשרה דברים מביאין את האדם לידי תחתוניות האוכל עלי קנים ועלי גפנים ולולבי גפנים ומוריגי בהמה ושדרו של דג ודג מליח שאינו מבושל כל צרכו והשותה שמרי יין והמקנח בסיד ובחרסית והמקנח בצרור שקנח בו חבירו וי"א אף התולה עצמו בבית הכסא יותר מדאי לא קשיא הא דמאריך ותלי הא דמאריך ולא תלי כי הא דאמרה ליה ההיא מטרוניתא לר' יהודה בר' אלעאי פניך דומים למגדלי חזירים ולמלוי ברבית אמר לה הימנותא לדידי תרוייהו אסירן אלא עשרים וארבעה בית הכסא איכא מאושפיזאי לבי מדרשא דכי אזילנא בדיקנא נפשאי בכולהו.
And Rav Yehuda said: There are three matters which, when one who prolongs their duration, they extend a person’s days and years.
They are: One who prolongs his prayer, one who prolongs his mealtime at the table, and one who prolongs his time in the bathroom.
The Gemara asks: And one who prolongs his prayer; is that a virtue?
Didn’t Rabbi Ḥiyya bar Abba say that Rabbi Yoḥanan said: Anyone who prolongs his prayer and expects it to be answered, will ultimately come to heartache, as it is stated: “Hope deferred makes the heart sick” (Proverbs 13:12). Similarly, Rabbi Yitzḥak said: Three matters evoke a person’s sins, and they are: Endangering oneself by sitting or standing next to an inclined wall that is about to collapse, expecting prayer to be accepted, as that leads to an assessment of his status and merit, and passing a case against another to Heaven, as praying for Heaven to pass judgment on another person causes one’s own deeds to be examined and compared with the deeds of that other person. This proves that prolonging prayer is a fault.
The Gemara resolves the apparent contradiction: This is not difficult.
This, where we learned that prolonging prayer is undesirable, refers to a situation when one expects his prayer to be accepted, while this, where Rav Yehuda says that prolonging prayer prolongs one’s life, refers to a situation where one does not expect his prayer to be accepted.
How does he prolong his prayer?
By increasing his supplication.
As for the virtue of prolonging one’s mealtime at the table, which Rav Yehuda mentioned, the Gemara explains: Perhaps a poor person will come during the meal and the host will be in a position to give him food immediately, without forcing the poor person to wait.
The Sages elsewhere praised a person who acts appropriately at a meal, as it is written: “The altar, three cubits high and the length thereof, two cubits, was of wood, and so the corners thereof; the length thereof, and the walls thereof, were also of wood” (Ezekiel 41:22), and it is written in the continuation of that verse: “And he said unto me: This is the table that is before the Lord.”
The language of this verse is difficult, as it begins with the altar and concludes with the table. Rather, Rabbi Yoḥanan and Rabbi Elazar both say: As long as the Temple stood, the altar atoned for Israel’s transgressions. Now that it is destroyed, a person’s table atones for his transgressions.
With regard to what Rav Yehuda said in praise of one who prolongs his time in the bathroom, the Gemara asks: Is that a virtue?
Wasn’t it taught in a baraita: Ten things bring a person to suffer from hemorrhoids: One who eats the leaves of bulrushes, grape leaves, tendrils of grapevines, the palate and tongue of an animal, as well as any other part of the animal which is not smooth and which has protrusions, the spine of a fish, a salty fish that is not fully cooked, and one who drinks wine dregs, and one who wipes himself with lime and clay, the materials from which earthenware is made, and one who wipes himself with a stone with which another person wiped himself. And some say: One who suspends himself too much in the bathroom as well. This proves that prolonging one’s time in the bathroom is harmful.
The Gemara responds: This is not difficult. This baraita, which teaches that doing so is harmful, refers to where one prolongs his time there and suspends himself, while this statement of Rav Yehuda refers to where one prolongs his time there and does not suspend himself. The Gemara relates the benefits of prolonging one’s time in the bathroom. Like that incident when a matron [matronita] said to Rabbi Yehuda son of Rabbi El’ai: Your face is fat and full, like the faces of pig farmers and usurers who do not work hard and who make a plentiful living. He said to her: Honestly, those two occupations are prohibited to me; rather, why is it that my face is nice? Because there are twenty-four bathrooms between my lodging and the study hall, and when I walk I stop and examine myself in all of them.
"Your table atones for you," through welcoming guests
Rav Soloveitchik, Abraham's Journey
The Almighty is the great makhnis orchim. His hospitality made it possible for humanity to exist, for the world to come into being. "To be" means to share in the infinite being of the Almighty. The Almightly, like Abraham, invites people to partake of His boundless existence. Creation is an act of haknasat orchim. Our sages (Berakhot 7b) said that Abraham was the first person to invoke God by the name A-donai. This name is of juridic origin; God owns the world in juridic terms...We are just strangers whom the Almighty has invited into his "tent," which is the universe. How beautiful is the doctrine of tzimtzum, of contraction....What is hakhnasat orchim if not withdrawal by the master from a part of his home so that a stranger can occupy the empty part he vacates?
(א) קְבוּרָה הָאֲמוּרָה בַּתּוֹרָה, הִיא שֶׁיִּתֵּן אֶת הַמֵּת בַּקַּרְקַע מַמָּשׁ. וּבְהַרְבֵּה מְקוֹמוֹת נוֹהֲגִין לְהַנִּיחַ אֶת הַמֵּת בְּאָרוֹן הֶעָשׂוּי מִנְּסָרִים וְכָךְ קוֹבְרִין אוֹתוֹ, דְּאִי אֶפְשָׁר שֶׁלֹּא יִהְיוּ נְקָבִים בְּאָרוֹן זֶה, וְסַגֵּי בְּהָכִי. וְיֵשׁ מְקוֹמוֹת שֶׁקּוֹבְרִין בְּלֹא אָרוֹן, אֶלָּא מַנִּיחִין אוֹתוֹ עַל הַקַּרְקַע מַמָּשׁ בְלֹא דַף תַּחְתָּיו, אֶלָּא מִן הַצְּדָדִין נוֹתְנִים שְׁנֵי דַפִּים, וְעַל אֵלּוּ נוֹתְנִים עוֹד דַּף אֶחָד, כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יִפּוֹל הֶעָפָר עַל גּוּף הַמֵּת, שֶׁזֶּה בִזָּיוֹן לוֹ. וְיֵשׁ עוֹד מְקוֹמוֹת שֶׁקּוֹבְרִין שְׁאָר מֵתִים כָּךְ בְּלֹא אָרוֹן, וְרַק לְכֹהֲנִים וּבְכוֹרִים שֶׁהֵם חֲשׁוּבִים, עוֹשִׂים אָרוֹן. כְּשֶׁעוֹשִׂין אָרוֹן, יֵשׁ לִזָּהֵר בְּשִׁיּוּרֵי הַנְּסָרִים, שֶׁלֹּא לַעֲשֹוֹת מֵהֶם אֵיזֶה תַשְׁמִישׁ, וְיֵשׁ לְהַסִּיק בָּהֶן תַּחַת הַכְּלִי שֶׁמְּחַמְּמִים אֶת הַמַּיִם לְטָהֳרָה. טוֹבֵי לֵבָב שֶׁהֶאֱכִילוּ עֲנִיִים עַל שֻׁלְחָנָם, יֵש לַעֲשוֹת לָהֶם אָרוֹן מִן הַשֻׁלְחָן, כְּמוֹ שֶׁכָּתוּב, וְהָלַךְ לְפָנֶיךָ צִדְקֶךָ.
(1) The burial mentioned in the Torah, means actually placing the body in the earth.1Cremation of the body is forbidden and those who ask to be cremated are considered transgressors and heretics as they deny the resurrection. Their ashes are forbidden to be interred in a Jewish cemetery and there should be no mourning over them. (See Yora Deiah 345:5) In many places it is customary to place the deceased in a wooden coffin, and he is buried in that manner. Since it is impossible that such a coffin is without holes [at the bottom], it is sufficient to bury him is such a way. In some places the body is buried without a coffin, rather it is placed actually on the earth, without a board underneath, but with one board placed on each side, and one more board on top of them to prevent any dirt from falling upon the body, which would be a dishonor to him. In other communities, ordinary men are buried without a coffin, and only for kohanim and firstborn males, who are of special importance, are coffins made. When making a coffin, care must be taken that the remnants of the boards not be used for any other purpose. They should be burned for fuel to heat the cauldron in which water is warmed for the ritual purification of the deceased. Benevolent people, who in their lifetime fed the poor at their table, should be buried in a coffin made of boards from the table, as it is written, "And your righteousness shall go before you."2Isaiah 58:8.